Can religion have negative effects on one's mind and life?

[Anonymous]

I've grown up very religious and grew up kind of strict. I'm at the age where I am a grown man but feel like there are mental blocks in my mind that has inhibit my ability to be a normal person. Like no premarital sex is engraved in my mind, no cursing, etc. It is so embedded in my mind that It held me back from not having a girlfriend or being flirtatious with women. I fear that it has damaged me permanently mentally. How can I break down these mental blocks and start to live?

[Metlahaed]

I don't know all the religions through and through, but the most popular ones most certainly can, and do. In fact, they can't avoid it. Negative effects are written fundamentally into their fabric.

The simple reality (whether people want to accept it or not) is that ALL religions are 100% man made, and they are all trying to sell you something (secret to life, happiness, access to heaven etc). The problem is that while their promises sound enlightening, the basis through which those promises are achieved have little or no bearing on the reality presented to us, and are often ritualistic and barbaric in nature (eating blood and body of Christ, circumcision, etc.). Yet, each religion urges you to trust in their stories and practices of divine nature, despite there being no actual divinity to them. It was PEOPLE, who didn't even know the earth was round, and screwed holes in your head to cure headaches, wait, I mean, to remove the evil demons within your skull... Riiiight.

Naturally, our brain does what 4 billion years of evolution programmed it to do, it tries to make sense of the reality presented to us. Since religions are NOT founded it reality, the methodology our brain uses to develop our value systems, our understanding, our ego, etc, faces a large amount of stress because often reality conflicts with the brainwashed belief system people formed, mostly unwittingly, and often without question, as a CHILD (this is also known as cognitive dissonance). So as the brain matures and gains relative information, your belief systems tend to created pain. This is also the reason so many people tend to "cherry-pick" which parts of their religion is relevant to them, it is the brain trying to reconciliation the conflict between the "divine" unquestionable truths of life, and their own coming-to-know of virtue through life experience. Pretending some parts of your religion don't exist is a small price to pay in order to keep your mind in check. The brain created a shortcut because it is easier to cut a few circuits than it is to rewire the whole brain.

Long story short, if you are convinced a squares are triangles, your gonna have to do some damage to your square to make it fit. (Beliefs vs reality vs behaviour). I should add, I mean reality based on evidence!

This fundamental flaw could drive people to baseless suicide bombings, it could deter you from falling in love with who in reality, would be best for you, and a million things in-between,

[Metlahaed]

I do realize there are certain benefits from religion as well, but lets not get into a religious debate.

No doubt there are many other ways religion is damaging as well, but the one I described is fundamentally ingrained in them all. People need to recognize that "I don't know" is a good answer in a lot of circumstances, and with that answer, you escape the commitment of shaping an unfounded belief that may cause damage when a situation contradicting that belief arises.

Overall, I feel religion has done more harm then good. Sadly, a lot of that harm is caused in order to preserve something that is completely contrived in the first place. And worst of all, I think that any good that does come from religion is completely achievable, and better off, without a religious overtone.

Needless to say, Religion takes up only a tiny fraction on the scale of human existence and development. I consider it a necessary evil on the path to scientific enlightenment.

[Metlahaed]

After all, It does make more sense that an early human would see a headache as an attack from outside moving inwards, or witness thunder and lighting and fear an unknowable power in the skies, than he would make a connection between blood vessels and the brain, or the effects of electromagnetism in the atmosphere.

This is simply the natural progress of a species blessed (or cursed) with a mutation causing rapid growth of the cortex thus making space for more neurons than it knows what to do with.

Ironically, early humans were indeed trying to make sense out of the reality presented to them, but they had little to no database of knowledge to build on, and the forces of nature were too intimately connected to their well-being to justify avoiding some explanation. That was the beginnings of superstition and religions.

[Metlahaed]

Sorry for the novel.

P. S I am not saying that some form of a God LIKE entity can't exist, I'm saying that if it does, we have absolutely no idea what it is like. But I can tell you two things; 1. if it does exist, it is much more mysterious, amazing, and incomprehensible than anything any human could ever write in a book and call it Holy.
And 2. It would probably care about me and you, humanity, earth, or even our universe as much as you care about the 3rd biggest shit you've ever taken in your life.

[Metlahaed]

Lol, I just realized I didn't even answer your question.

In tune with what I just said, the reality is that you are a sexual being, the false belief you have brainwashed into you is that sex need to be regarded as Holy. That right there creates a wallop of conflicting behaviors and beliefs. To me, it sounds like you are ready to break down those belief systems, and unfortunately, the only way to change your behavior is by acting on it. You can practice, get mentor, flirt with girls you know you aren't into at first, compliment a stranger on an article of clothing before never seeing them again... But you have to do it. There is no trick. You just have to convince yourself changing your behavior to match your changing beliefs is important enough to you.

[Metlahaed]

Also talk to people who were like you, inspirational stories, transformation stories etc.

[Metlahaed]

Lol sorry I keep adding to this, but I am going to assume you masturbate and watch porn, don't you think that interacting with a real human is so much more meaningful? In my opinion watching porn is a worse sin than premarital sex because it dehumanizes the entire experience. Why don't you try savrificng one for the other?

[Phantomium]

Misunderstood religion is what causes negative effects. That and lack of proper explanations for the child. Many religious rules have very sound logic behind them. You give as an example premarital sex:
1. 2000 years ago there were no contraceptives
2. The abortion option was non-existent.
3. A lone mother with a child couldn't really survive on her own.
4. Most men are unwilling to raise someone else's child
5. No treatments for STDs.

So the people of the time had only one solution - no sex. Add to that the idea that people should not be ruled by their primitive desires and that there's more to life than the purely physical and you get yourself a dogma, not to be questioned. This way you can explain to yourself all those "blocks" you have. The reasonable once should stay. The absurd ones should go. And the archaic ones that doesn't sound too bad should be determined by your own conscience.

[Razzle-Bedazzle]

It depends on how strong your faith is, how knowledgeable you are about your religious beliefs and how close you are to God

My father is a Muslim and my mum is a Christian , and religion has never has a negative effect on any on my family

[assley]

Yes. Not all but many idealogies can be harmful and confuse young people.

[Metlahaed]

Which ones aren't? If you don't mind me asking.

[assley]

@Metlahaed some non denoms are not as strict. One in my town has a large youth following because they counsel about pre marital sex and drug use. Openly. No judging.

[Metlahaed]

Oh ok, what is the ideal though?

[histiletto]

Depending on who responds to such queries, both negative and affirmative comments will strive to promote their philosophy. Since something doesn't seem to work in making you a better person in relating to others, it is your responsibility to correct the effects you perceive it plays in your life as to the kind of person you are or want to radiate truthfully. Humans are social beings that seem to mature better as they interact with others through serving/aiding and being served/aided. Traditionally, religions have set up these scenarios for service, so that we can invigorate and encourage our family and friends while they do the same for us. If the fire and brimstone is the motivation to do better, then we might not be able to notice the exhorting opportunities for growth.

[KeiranByrne]

Well meaning zealots have, hopefully unintentionally, zeroed in on any slight transgression and pronounced it a sin for no good reason whatsoever.
Masturbation: there is nothing anywhere in the Bible saying you can't masturbate.
Fornication: sex between 2 unmarried people - the only rule against this has to do with unquestionable paternity rights when the woman does marry. Visiting prostitutes is a form of fornication but it is specifically allowed. I believe the only biblical point is that Jewish girls were not allowed to be prostitutes, but not prob otherwise.
Homosexuality: no prohibition there either. Arguably the 2 verses (just TWO compared with 1000's railing against adultery) both say man may not lie with a man as with a woman. AS WITH A WOMAN. In effect no anal sex - penetration with penis into a bodily orifice below the waist other than a vagina.

[MrRSole]

Yes, it can. You're so engrossed in what you've been taught you're not letting yourself live.

As for the way you can remove these mental blocks, try going with the quitting smoking method, ween it down bit by bit, try cursing, flirting and the likes.

Think to yourself how much you want to remove these, why, and what benefits does this give.

I'm personally non religious, so I'm biased, however make sure that no matter what you do, you don't sacrifice what you believe in!

You don't need to be die hard religious to believe.

Only change for yourself.

Most of all, just remember, there are plenty of heavily religious people that are married, have children and have successful social lives and relationships.

[AndyOh]

I have had the privilege of experiencing different religious beliefs, from attending services as well as bible studies and religious classes. So yes, I think some religions, or variations of them, can affect how one grows up. I also have seen where the real hard-core reglious ethics turn out a young adult who just goes crazy after being so oppressed, like you have been.
The best advice I can offer is to see a counselor, who can help you move forward and shed the shackles that are holding you back. Good luck.

[ClauseViter]

Ya the folk-metaphysics is mainly a crutch to legitimate main stream morals providing "support" to most of the obligatory contracts people are held to by the government. Ofcourse this a major impediment in reforming Federal policy because people lack now lack the competency to derive reflexive laws, in other words they have definitive notions of empty phrases such as "right" or "wrong".

A lot of problems could be solved if people sought rational sources for their beliefs and even then understood them to simply be 'beliefs'.

[sedrftvgyhujik]

Yes the unfounded guilt you get from religion is damaging to your psychological well being.
If you believe natural things are wrong ( masterbation and that every sperm is sacred ) then thats going to make you feel ashamed and bad and find it harder to talk openly about sex.
If you believe being gay is wrong it will make it harder to get on with 10-15 ish % of the population.
If you believe in preaching conversionism to your religion then you will really annoy pepole.
If you deeply believe something that goes against established facts like how things evolve or Radiometric dating then it will make it harder to understand how certain things work some of which may or may not benefit you personally.
If you won't accept transfusions you may lose your life as a result.
There are lot's of ways it could cause you problems depending on what exactly you believe.

[Lucifer_666]

Just keep in mind that you only have one life to live. Live life however you want to and take responsibility for your actions. Ask yourself why any loving god why prevent you from enjoying life when you're doing nothing wrong? And then there's the moral issue and that's a whole different topic

[Waffles731]

anything, religion, atheism, drugs, agnosticism can have ill affects on you're mind if its done to the point of arrogance or intolerance

[Greek_God]

Yes, if religion is presented as a boundry. Many parents force their kids into religion and use it to make their kids uptight. Fuck that. Religion is there to be like a fuel. To just help you achieve even greater distances than you could without it. Not to hold you down.

[tamont3]

I've seen it time and time again. Anyone who feels the NEED to keep reminding me of their righteousness, I get the hell away from. Bells and whistles in my head going apeshit.

[es20490446e]

https://youtu.be/r4Y-Ckp1jVY

[AskNaz]

Yes, but I think more so stemming from the misinterpretation of certain rules or properties of that religion, especially by young people.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely, especially if taken to extremes. The guilt associated with religion can be damaging, in my opinion.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

What's wrong with not having permartial sex or not cursing? I think those are good values.

Now religion where people shut down mental logic or become violent etc isn't good religion.

[HaveNoName]

There is nothing wrong with those values if you are sincere to them and with yourself. Do you think cursing gets you laid?

[DiegoO]

Only if you turn extremeist with your believes.

[LoveHorses]

There's a lot of hate in any kind of religion

[Walrus_au]

Hell yes. In almost innumerable ways.

[Consultantisback3]

it causes autism and weakness

[ladsin]

Yes it can