Do women have preferences for men that are resourceful and can provide (read details - it's important)?

[Cubus]

Read before you answer:

So, today I had a discussion with one person on this site. We came on topic to how society expects men to provide for family and if they don't they lose value and are told to kill themselves. All of this is (in her opinion) because of harmful cultural norms.

I told her that, yes, there are such expectations, but it is because it's completely normal for women to prefer men that are resourceful - this is how we are genetically adjusted. And even if society formally does not expect men to be breadwinners, women still expect men to at least participate in the house budget.

Her response was "that might be so where you are from but that isn’t the case in the USA"

That made me curious. I am not from USA, but I know the majority of people here are from USA, and a lot of them are women.

I want you to highlight me - is it a case or not?

Yes, it is expected

No, it is not expected

[TrueConfection]

I hear all the time that traditionalism is unimportant, unexpected, and in most cases unwelcomed. But...

Talk is cheap.

Those same people are in relationships and complaining that their spouse doesn't contribute as much to the household as they do (with money, chores, and childcare). So, yes of course the care and I do believe men are expected to be resourceful.

I know two couples where she is the breadwinner. In both cases, they split over the childish argument of who is doing more.

My husband and I have expectations of eachother and roles. We feel we are both equally important and equal contributors to the household. He knows he's not just a paycheck and I'm not the maid, but we are gears working on unison for the betterment of our family.

The couples we know that have been together for the long haul, share a similar viewpoint to ours.

I thought that maybe this view is age related, but my kids are your age and they have the same views and so do their friends.

Actually, just yesterday I was witnessing a teenage couple goofing off and flirting with eachother (I live in a small town, so they are acquaintances to me). They have been dating for a year so far and both are WOKE as can be. What I noticed was their behavior. Teasing and flirting, him grab her hand and her giggle and act submissive to his advance... Not the other way around and if no one moved there would be a stale mate. Maybe she doesn't mind if he lives on her couch, but I'm fairly certain she expects him to be resourceful.

[Cubus]

Interesting

[TrueConfection]

Thank you for the MHO ❤

[Cubus]

You're welcome

[Apple1996]

A little bit since I like being a stay at home mom so it's easier to have a husband that will provide but if he didn't I wouldn't mind doing it

[SnowedIn]

I think that there's still somewhat of a preference in the U. S. for men to be the primary bread winner -- sort of. But you also hear a lot about women who want their own career and to contribute.

I think the nuance here is that in the U. S. it is no longer expected that a woman won't work even if there are children. Regardless of who is supporting the family.

[Leopard23]

Absolutely even the so called strong independent women have this preference because their resources are for them but so are yours and if they get pregnant or lose their job or get sick you are supposed to support them

[LazerBean]

It is generally expected, but there are an increasing amount of desperate women who will put up with just about anything.

[Guy13]

Yeah man, she's got no clue and probably never had a long-term relationship. Ignore her as women expectations are high.

[Cubus]

She says she has a husband.

[Guy13]

Maybe she's been married 40 years... You can't tell on Sm about anything. LDRs for instance.

[greenice27]

The USA is a country with a masculine culture. But the prime minister of Finland is women. In that country, the position of women seems stronger. Spouse preferences may also differ from America.

[Lucy68]

Men are the hunters and providers