Why do older baby boomer men hug women in their 20s without asking first?

Anonymous

I'm not trying to upset anyone by asking this question. This question is a bit of a rant. I'm not saying all baby boomer men do this. But I noticed that that generation isn't big on asking for permission first before hugging women way younger than them.

They just hug them wordlessly expecting that the woman will be fine with it. I'm someone where I wasn't taught to stand up for myself. It's extremely hard for me to deflect the hug and offer my hand instead, in fear that I'll upset the guy and get a bad reaction.

Maybe most guys won't care, maybe they'd prefer if the girl would tell them no. But I don't know most men so I always err on the side of caution even though I'm uncomfortable and I don't want to be doing this.

If he had asked first I would feel way better hugging him because he asked for my permission first even if we just met. If I don't want to hug someone I just met I would offer my hand for handshake instead.

But to just assume every woman wants to be touched by some random man even if he doesn't mean anything by it or has good or bad intentions, I think no matter what you should always ask first. Man or woman. You don't know their trauma, their life. Most men don't hug so usually people don't put men in the awkward position to hug them.

However they shouldn't assume every woman in this entire world wants to hug. Some women don't like being touched, is that so crazy? It just really annoys me that people don't take inconsideration if the woman is comfortable with something before doing it. Like they don't even ask her first... Why?

I'll be honest I don't even like hugging women either. But every woman who has hugged me has asked if I am comfortable with hugs before doing it.

I never had a man ask me for my permission and I just wonder why when men are so afraid of rape and sexual assault accusations. I know a young guy, a stranger, around my age would never hug me out of nowhere. I'm glad they know not to do that.

Why do older baby boomer men hug women in their 20s without asking first?
3 Opinion