How to not "hit the wall" as a man?

[Unit1]

What is "hitting the wall" anyway?

"hit the wall" is the saying formed by the MGTOW community in order to describe women, who are past their natural prime and have made choices after choices to degrade themselves to the point, where most men don't even want to look at them by the time they are aging (typically at 30). And by the time the alarm bells go off like that, it's too late to turn back.

I put this in quote marks since I don't like the choice of words for this tendency. "self-degradation" suits it so much more. Or ruining themselves.

Now, here's the direction I want to steer this question.

When girls reach adulthood, they are young and beautiful and cute. If there's one thing girls need to know is that these things won't last for too long and with the right lifestyle choices (and sticking to these) they can prolong it for so much longer beyond the 30s.

For some reason there's a... lets say a big number of them going the opposite direction such as exploiting men by abusing their youth & beauty, bad life decisions, unhealthy habits and who knows why they treat their youth & beauty as a given and weaponize it rather than something to treasure and preserve. These things WILL reflect and bounce off right back and at some point it will accumulate enough, so that no guy wants to look at them.

BUT WAIT! This isn't about the girls! This is about the boys!

What characteristics or qualities do young boys possess, that makes them wanted by the girls? And how can the boys preserve those things and stay attractive and not ruin themselves as they get older? Or is it like the men keep preaching how it's all about status and money (ew!)? Surely many girls did wish to have a teenage or 20-something year old boyfriend or else they wouldn't be thinking about anime boys or Vito Scaletta from Mafia 2 (i remember this one from one girl here) while they're hugging their pillows and blankets.

[RebelinSteel]

That there is one of greatest problems some guys have

“And how can the boys preserve those things and stay attractive and not ruin themselves as they get older?”

the answer is you don’t, no one wants to date a teen. I don’t think there is anything I did as a teen that would be remotely attractive to a 20-40 woman.

Understanding a room, the area you are, the type of people you are socialising with, being realistic about who you can score with, not getting bitch hurt because you can’t pull the hottest girl in the room and then quitting.

[alice55]

It all depend on the person, hit the wall at 30 for women make no sense considering that healthy 30 years old women who are wealthy definitely look younger and much better than a lots of poor 20s women (more and more obesity, overweight, overworking, stress, poverty, pregnancy, etc...) a lot of stuff cn damage body and mind, your age doesn't' determine your attractiveness as much as your lifestyle.

For men I would say the age is usually late 30s that they hit the wall because at this age most are balding or having grey white hair and being obese / overweight as well as not putting any effort in their appearance because laziness or too much work. (Like I found Tom Hardy attractive in the early 2010s but now he's just fat and wrinkly, he was much more attractive in his 20s and early 30s).

Only things that make older men attractive to some is money or being in a position of power (they care more about material than appearance). For men to keep being attractive while older they need to sleep the required time 9 hours, taking care of their skin, working out and staying fit (not become overweight and eating in a healthy ways, drinking enough water, not getting sick, not drinking because it ruin skin and make it dry, protecting skin for the harsh sun, etc...). After some people are just lucky and look young too. Depend on the family gene.

[KostasKouvalis]

I Googled his current pics after reading this, and I agree, he looks gross now. I also feel that a lot of men let themselves go after they get married, because they already achieved their goal. By this point she's already fallen in love with him and he knows divorce is tideous, so he has no more incentive to look good. While a woman is expected to keep pleasing her man so she is held to higher standards. And women in general are pressured to look good for society. But you'd be amazed how many women cheat on their husbands after a certain time, with younger men, even if it's only sexting.

In the case of celebrities, women are expected to look presentable in the public eye if they want a job. I was afraid what would happened when my celebrity crushes start turning 50, but I'm still attracted to them ^_^ And I had a crush on one of my university professors who was in her 40s. Female celebrities can still look hot well into their 50s and even 60s. And I've noticed this too, that for some reason a lot of women get hotter when they get older. There's one Brazilian volleyball player I find attractive, who looked so ugly 10 years ago. My cousins are maybe the only exception to this. Two of them got ugly from too much alcohol and cigarette use, and the other two let themselves go. One was having marriage problems the other was having man problems in general, so I think they just lost the incentive to stay attractive.

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis Yes, I found him so attractive before (I watched his older movie) but when I saw pictures of his new movies, I was like, "yea he definitely let himself go" at his age it doesn't surprise me though most men do not take care of themselves when getting older. It's not even a matter of having a wife or not it's just they lose interest in taking care of themselves or just never did, it's rare to see men taking care of themselves after 30s.
Even a lot of 20s guys don't do it, they get overweight and / or just dress in sweatpants all days, when they get married 10 / 20 years of marriage the wife does get fed up by it and yes there's cheating though in France women don't cheat that much 30 % compared to Russia or Scandinavian countries it's very low.

Divorce is not tedious though only men think is it it seem because women have no trouble filling for divorce (I think 8 divorce out of 10 are starting by women)

Yes, it all depend if she take care of herself or not. Men also do smoke et drink a lot of alcohol so it doesn't help.

Now my celebrity crush is Tom Blyth.

[KostasKouvalis]

It's so funny because they were talking about making him the next James Bond and I was like, "Alice will be so happy." ^_^

I think you mentioned him before. I Googled him, and he's hot. I'm jealous.

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis I would still be happy if he get the role, still like him he's a great actor even if his looks went down, don't change the fact he's a great actor. I still appreciate him.

Not sure I did mention the character he's playing in the new hunger games movie but I'm not sure if I had mentioned his name.
I think I just talked about his character Coriolanus Snow, he does look very good with blond hair.
Yes, He's very hot.

[KostasKouvalis]

I don't know, you've shown me quite a few actors you find attractive. ^_^

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis Yes XD
There's many attractive actor like Anakin actor Hayden Christensen but he also hit the wall, last years I watched the Obi Wan series and he's in it and I could see that time wasn't kind with him at all. He look really old in it.

[KostasKouvalis]

Oh, I know that guy. Maybe if you were in your 40s you'd find him attractive. I often wonder if that'll happened to me when I get old. If I'll be attracted to grandmas, or younger girls ^_^

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis He's pretty well know; maybe, usually the more we get old the older our crush become like when we're 14 and think that 11 years old middle schooler look like baby and tiny and we see ourself as much bigger while in true when you become 17 you see 14 as being little kid. I'm 25 and when I see high schooler I consider them as baby.
Our perception of age change as we age, my mother consider 30 years old people as kid because she's nearing her 60. For me 30 feel far away while it's just 5 years away but I feel closer to 20s people than 30s.

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis I think if old people are attracted to really young girl it become quite creepy

[KostasKouvalis]

That's very true, and I remember when I was a kid I thought I would be married at 16 because 16 was so old. Yes, some people consider it weird to say "college KIDS" or call women "girls".
Yes, when I was in my late 20s I found myself starting to interact with women in their 30s. I'm 31 and my mom thinks 35 is too old for me😂
19 is about the lowest age I can still vibe with as I have a young mental age, and I often forget that 19 is too young for me to date ^_^. I think 25 is still fine 😉

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis That's so close though XD
I think it's important to remain close in age like no more than ten years gap cause after it get messy.
We're close in age after all ^^

[KostasKouvalis]

I know, yet she says 25 is okay. She's weird 😂 I guess the general rule of thumb is 8 years, but there's wiggle room and I've seen even larger age gaps. The main thing is, that you're most likely to be in different stages in your life.
We are. 6 years isn't that big, and I know my parents would be really happy if I brought home a French girl, especially my dad ^_^

[alice55]

@KostasKouvalis So weird yes XD
Yes and after there's always the older one that think he's superior and know everything (this happen so often the older one treating their partner as baby).
Yes, 6 years are ok especially if close in maturity ^^
that's great ^-^

[KostasKouvalis]

That's so annoying, honestly.
I think my parents would like you, especially your views, and my mom would like that you're Catholic and know how to cook dishes from different cultures. It would take some of the pressure off of her. There are some things my mom may not like though, as she's very picky and has high standards, but we could just hide those from her ^_^

I'll admit, I kind of wanna marry a French girl now and I like them more than Indian girls now. I love Indian anesthetics, but a lot of them are very artificial, like the jewelry and make up. While French girls I like for their natural beauty. Plus, Indian families are so demanding and their culture is so weird.
I know I've told you this before, but YOU got me obsessed with French girls. I never understood why my dad loves them so much, but now I do. ^_^

[Apple1996]

Most men are born at the wall so y'all unfortunately never have prime years. I think this is why some men get so bent out of shape about women having prime years because they are jealous of us

[KrakenAttackin]

@Apple1996 **bang**... there went another apple.458 troll round...

[Apple1996]

@KrakenAttackin oh this isn't trolling. a lot of women think this. I follow a tiktok account about men hitting the wall

[KrakenAttackin]

@Apple1996. Our "wall" is that we die a lot earlier than you.

[Apple1996]

@KrakenAttackin yeah right most men aren't even attractive in their early years. Then they go bald, fat, grey in later years. There is only a small percentage of desirable men

[Apple1996]

@KrakenAttackin the wall is really yalls hairline 😆

[KrakenAttackin]

@Apple1996. True enough, but men are valued for the resources they can provide more than anything else.

[Apple1996]

@KrakenAttackin eh I personally cannot get turned on if a guy is balding or grey. Maybe once I'm older it'll change but for now I care about hair and dick. My husband's resources meant nothing to me when we met

[KrakenAttackin]

@Apple1996. So what advice will you give your Sons?

[Apple1996]

@KrakenAttackin use hair oil and dye 😂😂

[ProbablyClueless]

It seems like guys can avoid hitting the wall by simply getting serious about hitting the gym, dressing well, and having good hygiene.

Have a good skin care routine. Have a good haircut. Trim your facial hair and make sure everything looks tidy.

[BonzoInBitburg]

Three of the things women want most in a man is confidence, maturity and financial security. If a man has that, there is no wall. Men don't even need to be attractive to attract a woman. I'm bald with a dad bod and I dated more at 50 than in high school playing on all the sports teams when I was in great shape.

[handsomelad70]

Bonzo, you hit the nail on the head, pard. Look at the ugly but ULTRA-RICH dudes with flat-out BABES !!!

[exitseven]

You need to live life as though it is a marathon and not a sprint. You are in it for the long term and realize that you need to develop and nurture not only your physical prowess but you mental abilities as well.

[Snakeyes7]

I always heard that men are born in the wall and have to work to escape it. That usually doesn't happen until their late 20s at best.