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Home > Articles > Behavior Articles > Why Do Girls Want to Get Married?
Kyttee
Written By Kyttee

Why Do Girls Want to Get Married?

 
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Posted More than a year ago Views 8290 Comments 18 Category Behavior
Starting at birth, our heads are filled with images of our wedding day. Parents dream of seeing their little girl walking down the aisle in a beautiful wedding gown. Even if we do find the cure for cancer, we better be married when we do it! While I'm sure parents equally dream of their sons eventually getting married, it is a bit less exciting to plan for the day they will finally get to wear that rented suit and patent leather shoes.

What naturally comes along with this pressure to get married is the guilt, particularly from our mothers, when we aren't yet wed. As we get older, the level of guilt is ratcheted up exponentially with each year that passes without a set wedding date. With every family gathering we attend without a "fiance", we are forced to endure a sort of Chinese Water Torture that involves hearing about every other relative or friend who is getting married soon.

We must invent more creative and believable excuses to answer the inevitable, "When are you getting married?" question at parties. Like, "I want to finish my time in the Peace Corp first", or "I have a pact with my best friend that we will not get married before the other and she cannot find the right man." In addition, we are endlessly subjected to the hushed whispers of how we must be lesbians or just do not know how to cook.


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Another thing to keep in mind is the constant barrage of images we see our entire lives which place us all on the inevitable path towards marriage. Barbie, the symbol of unattainable wealth, beauty, success, and happiness always looked her most beautiful in her long white wedding gown as she walked down the tissue constructed aisle in our backyard ceremonies to Ken, her handsome groom. Every book, television show, movie, or song that is marketed towards girls always focuses on falling in love, getting married, and living happily ever after.

From Cinderella and Prince Charming, to Luke and Laura, to Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise, we are inundated with the idea that we will never be truly happy until we find that perfect man and walk down the aisle. It is almost like some sort of cultist mind-control that has been ruling our destiny since we were old enough to say the words, "I Do."

While guys do not seem to think that these issues are that big of a deal, for girls the decades of pressure, guilt and marketing have taken their toll and we start to feel as if we are actually going to explode if we do not get married soon. This certainly does not apply to all women but it does apply to most.

Ultimately, we all just want to have that feeling of safety and security. Women today are capable of doing just about everything a man can do. We are doctors and lawyers and builders and athletes, but for some reason when it comes to the thought of going through life as a single woman, a chill shoots through our spines like ice was dropped down our shirts. Our minds drift back to our "old maid" Aunt Mary who everyone else felt sorry for. (Although in retrospect, she did seem happier than all the other aunts).

So remember, girls are not obsessed with getting married because we want to be. We are obsessed with it because that is what society expects from us. We are merely the victims of a lifetime of mind control and advertising dollars. So, give us a break and just propose already! It will make us all a little less stressed and our mothers happier too.


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Article Comments

 
marisa Eh, I suppose this applies to some girls, maybe most. I never dreamed of a white wedding, though. As a little girl, I dreamed of making piles of money and changing the world. I hope more women grow to focus on things other than walking down the aisle. - More than a year ago
David-C Marraige is over rated anyway. I think people should just work on being happy and if it happens great, if not, well that's great too. - More than a year ago
A-R-Norman I never dreamt of a white wedding and didn't think I'd get married. I didn't stress over it. Met a good guy--we married in a court house. Women should have the right to choose, just as men do and not stress or be labelled. - More than a year ago
djPechkin I definitely agree that the pressure comes from the parents. Biologically speaking a person's life isn't complete until they have grandchildren. (Until they've raised a child that can procreate on his/her own). For girls, that goal is so much more potent! - More than a year ago
pointyourtoe My-uh-"Aunt Mary" is actually the one who is putting the most pressure on me to be with someone, to the point where she said I'm not allowed to bring a friend to the family Christmas party if it's not a man. I do have to admit I have often thought of my ideal white wedding, but until recenlty when family has started pressuring me to "bring home a man" and friends have semi-jokingly said that I will be a cat lady soon if I don't get dating, it hadn't really bothered me that I haven't dated. - More than a year ago
condoractual All of my married friends tell me that they envy me and then ask when I'm going to get married and join them in Hell. If that doesn't keep a man single then consider what my friends tell about arguements and disagreements: "You can be right, or you can be happy. It's your choice". I'll stick to bachelorhood for a while longer thanks. - More than a year ago
melissarose8585 I, um, I'm actually one of those rare females that hates the idea of marriage. It could be a long-term thing, as when I was younger I also tended to get very angry at Barbie for having everything she wanted, or could be me rebelling against the status quo. But I do feel what you're saying, as many of us have been there and been pressured to "get married" and "start a family." - More than a year ago
Romanticguy1988 Why girls want to get married?
I would no doubt say ''Eternal Love''. - 11 months ago
kigirl33 So I don't know what happened durring your child hood but my mom always said to be happy and sucessful before I even considered marriage(other wise she will kill me). I think this next generation has been more focused on jobs and careers than boys and babies. Marriage is a serious thing and moms preasure should not be a factor in the decision. Chill out on the wedding thing if it happens awsome if not, there are better things to do anyway. ps do most women really feel all this preasure? - 11 months ago
mndjoy Great article... until the last paragraph. So, not only are women NOT expected to fight back against massive peer-pressure and mind control, men ARE expected to give into it as well.

Ladies this is OUR problem, not theirs. - 7 months ago
janeek Who are Luke and Laura? And is this article some kind of joke? Seriously. - 6 months ago
xxcalibanxx Liked the article however I would have to disagree. I was never pressured to get into a realtionship, get married etc. I want to be married, but that is because I want security and I think its the only way you can show how much you love that other person. And society doesn't expect us to get married. I know tons of older people that aren't married. And I wouldn't say obessed with getting married, people just want to get married more then others. And its a shame people are pushed into marriage. - 4 months ago
xxcalibanxx (sorry ran out of space). If people are pushed into marriage then it is the wrong meaning of marriage (which I hate, marriage is for life). I respect women that don't want to get married but at the end of the day, if I didn't want to, I'd stand up for myself, and just say marriage isn't for me. Even if there is guilt, your parents etc. should respect you for your decision. - 4 months ago
Standingpretty I truly want to get married some day- not because of stupid media pressure, my family/friends/mother, or because of Barbi. I want to get married to have a day so everyone can celebrate that I have found the love of my life (I know you don't need a special day to do that,everyday should be a celebration, but I want one anyways) and so I can have that one dream day of my partners and my life that will only get to happen once. It's the closet thing to a fairytale that a woman can experience. - A month ago
SeanE So it goes with society, women are abandoning family-related things and are just pursuing their things. The result, the destruction of men and that good ol' thing we called "family."

So what do people with this kind of mind want to achieve? Just be a single woman forever? Or marry, have kids with a man you want, then divorce him? I mean, not even men ever had this kind of thinking. I'm sorry, but in America, women were always capable of becoming whatever they wanted to be. Amelia Earhart e.g. - A month ago
joe903 Well being a guy , some say its sad but I dream of getting married and plan it out and how special it will be in the same way as most girls dream about it. I cannot wait untill I meet the right girl :) - A month ago
Jessicafromboston To a certain extent I do believe what the article says. I can certainly say that in really catholic countries like Brazil, girls are expected to get married. The pressure is usually created by the girls themselves, usually when they are around thirty and unmarried, because they have not fulfilled the 'task' that society required of them. The pressure is also build up by the fact that most girls at this age are married and seem happy with their husband and possibly children, and also because they - 4 days ago
Jessicafromboston (continued ...) feel like they are running out of time. Many also feel sad and neglected, because it seems like all their friends have found true love, except them.

Well, in my case, I have always dreamed about the 'fairy-tale' wedding and I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I want to take care of my husband, have children and live what I consider a fulfilled life. I still wanna have a career and job , that's why I'm just waiting to graduate college to get married (already engaged) - 4 days ago
 
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