My boyfriend head butted and back handed me?

My boyfriend woke me up arguing with me about something that didn't even matter as the argument increased he head butted me really hard and my reaction was to hit back then he back handed me twice and left the room... I've never been hit before I was in shock I don't know what to do he's never hit me before. He came back 30 minutes later and said sorry but made it look like I'm the one who made him do it... I don't know what to do


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I dont know the context well enough to give advise but the same thing happened to me only my boyfriend immediately apologized left and started bawling in the other room. Your guys an asshole for trying to blame you for his actions.

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What Guys Said 13

  • DO NOT ACCEPT THIS! GET OUT and LEAVE HIS ASS. I hope you have a safe place to go. Call a friend, your mom, someone that you trust and go with them. This douche sounds like a Coward. No Guy should ever hit a girl regardless of the situation, regardless of whos at fault. If you tell yourself its Okay and that he won't do it again, I would say your lying to yourself. Why do you think he's trying to blame you so he looks like he was some sort of Victim. I know it may be hard for you but should just end it now.

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  • I'm sorry, never an excuse for hitting... The chances of him doing it again are very high, especially if you stay with him (which indirectly says "I'm okay with you head-butting and smacking me")... Dump him and move on...

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  • Leave now. Blaming you means he has no intent to change. I can't stress this enough. Leave now. Don't go back to him!

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  • Leave him immediately.

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  • Lol this guy is a fucking lunatic. Normal people don't fly off over a stupid argument and head butt someone, even if they lose their tempers. He's definitely mentally disturbed and will probably get murdered someday when he pulls this on the wrong guy.

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  • He had no right to hit you so you better see this
    is a red flag

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  • It says something about the sort of guys you're attracted to. I'm sorry you had to go through that. My advice is to get a restraining order.

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  • It will only become more easier for him to hurt you. best to leave him.

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  • He is a pussy. Leave him

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  • You need to get out of that relationship NOW! That is abuse, and there is NO excuse for it!

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  • What are you doing with a little bitch anyways. Next time he even raises his hand just give him a good kick to his VAGINA. Or get some little 12 yr old kid to do it if he doesn't run away like a coward.

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  • he was wrong to hit you. but you were wrong to hit him back. violence is not the answer to violence.

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    • I'm sure there are a number of murder victims out there that would have argued against that opinion.

    • yeah she wasn't in danger tho. in fact hitting back icreased the danger for her. hitting back was just an attempt at retaliation, not serious self-defense

  • Talk to your mother. Get some advice from someone who knows you well.

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What Girls Said 10

  • My mother was abused by my father it was really bad and almost got her killed. He abused my oldest sister because she looked caucasian (we are Mexican and my moms side is extremely light skinned) and almost killed me as a baby because I was extremely light skinned. It had a lot to do with starving, hitting, pushing, mental abuse, and rape. It all started with a slap... don't think it will stop or it will never happen again because it will. You let it happen once and he will know he can get away with it. I say leave before you end up his target anytime he becomes mad. Its not ok no matter what you did he should have walked away when you hit him which wouldn't of happened if he didn't head butt you. I know ending a relationship is hard but this one is no good and he proved it for times. One head butt, one back handed slap, another back handed slap, then coming and "apologizing" making you seem at fault. Four times in one night he proved he is no longer worth your time, effort, love, compassion, or fear.

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  • This is how regular abuse in a relationship starts.
    I wouldn't forgive him.
    He needs counseling.
    Tell him when he's receiving it only then will you reconsider your relationship.
    He struck you three times, that's definitely not okay.

    It's possible that he lost his temper and will never do that again.
    But because his actions were so extreme I would think the chances of that happening again
    are very likely.

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    • Re read the story - no exception ! Leave him ! I didn't see the part where he continued to blame you even after the event. This is bad news.

  • Ugh, just leave him. Resorting to physical violence during an argument is just sad. And the fact that he tried to blame you for "making him do it" shows that he's an immature brat who tries to manipulate people when he doesn't want to take responsibility over his own actions.

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  • that is not cool, not cool at all. If you can, leave the house for a few days so that he understands the gravity and seriousness of the situation. Then, if you feel you want to continue with him you need to address what happened, why it happened and how he's going to make sure it never happens again. Losing your temper is no one's fault but your own, I'm sure there have been times when you've felt like punching him in the face, but you haven't because you know that it's not acceptable. There is no way he should be blaming you for his actions and this screams domestic abuser. It very very scary being hit for the first time, it's also extremely emotional, I think your mom is who you need right now. I was in a relationship with this guy who would hurt me, the first time he did it he was so apologetic, and the third, and the fourth, by the fifth time I wasn't scared of him anymore and then just left. Get away for a few nights, let him really think about his actions.

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  • This isn't ok. It's never ok to hit a woman despite how angry she could of made him. It isn't in any way your fault. This is uncalled for. This is typical abusive behavior and this will not be the last time he hits you. I suggest you end this relationship and I also suggest you cut all ties to him. Reason being he will lure you back in with apologies. If you need help getting out of the situation contact family or friends or the police. This isn't ok and it's really upsetting to see so many woman being abused and being told it's their fault. I really hope your ok :( don't let him do this to you again!

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  • I've never heard of an isolated incident like that... if it happens once, it'll happen again. Especially if he's making you feel like its your fault.

    Leave him.

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  • It's not like there are different options of what you could do now, even if you may believe there are. There's only one.

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  • Jesus... talk to him and talk to his friends, and your family. Try to figure out just what the hell made him lose his temper.

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  • leave the pussy. get to a safe place and leave whilst he's out etc he won't change they never do,

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  • Get out run for your life run.

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