I got friendzoned and I don't want to live anymore

Two weeks ago, the only girl I ever cared about friendzoned me and I truly do not want to live anymore. Life is just crap, I hate it, I hate everything about it, I wish I was aborted, in fact, if I had a time machine I'd go back and kill myself on the day I was born, that's how much I utterly despise my life and myself. This one girl, she was one of the few things that made me happy, I loved her more than anything, more than myself, but, apparently I'm worth nothing to her. And please don't give me that nonsense about how "oh, but, at least she wants to be your friend" or "oh, that means you're even more special to her" that's a lie and you know it. I'm not good enough, I'm not good enough to actually be loved, just to be a little lapdog, a "friend". And if you think I only became her friend to get her, don't, I liked her because I got to know her, not the other way around. I'm just so miserable and angry, I wish everyone felt this way, I really do, I did nothing to deserve this, but I still got it anyway, I wish everyone knew how it felt to want to out a gun to your head. It's not fair, I would have done anything for her, so of course I'm, "just a friend", as if I'm less than she is. And don't give me that bs about how I'll "find someone else" or "love comes to those who wait" or anymore more nonsense about love, those are just lies for the weak, the reality is just cruel and pointless, and death is probably the best solution anyway. I don't care about any other girl, they're not her, they're worthless to me. Dying is all I really want, I don't care about what's after death, I don't care if there's nothing after death, I just don't want to be feeling this anymore. I'm a man, a pathetic excuse for one, if I was a real man, I wouldn't care. Oh well, the one girl I loved/wanted basically told me I'm worth nothing and that I'm below her, and, you know what she's right. Right now, I just want to go and die, I'm going to die alone and as a virgin anyway.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sweetheart, what is happening over here? You should never let someone else's actions make you feel like you need to end your life. Nobody is worth that... I'm sorry that you got friendzoned, especially since she clearly meant so much to you, but... there is no proof, no evidence that there is only one person for each of us. Think about all the girls that you have met... that's SUCH a small fraction of all the girls in the world... do you really believe that it's impossible for you to like another girl? You never know- later on in life, you may find certain personality and physical traits attractive that you didn't before... Peoples' tastes change over time as a result of our experiences, our mental and physical development- I know my tastes vastly changed and continue to change. To end it all now is such a disservice to yourself. Finding a partner is just -one- aspect of life. How about all the amazing things that you can do on your own? How about the people you can help by being their friend? Or your role as a son or a sibling? It doesn't even have to be that profound... just holding the door open for a random person who had been having a bad day can change his or her life for the better. If you remove yourself from this grand equation, you're going to throw us all off. Do you really want to do that? :p

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    • I'm a crappy son, and a drag on my friends, I'm an error in the equation, in fact, sometimes I think I was born specifically to suffer and die.

    • We are all born to die. The first second we open our eyes is just another second closer to the moment we will die. That is true. But between birth and death, there is so much that you can do. I know I've been a crappy daughter, a drag on my friends, and I too felt like an error in the equation for the longest time... but it's almost egocentric to think that what is happening to you is horrible enough to warrant an untimely death. Maybe my bad experiences and what I learned from them was put into the equation so that I could talk to you about it, and hopefully get you to see that there is absolutely nothing in this world that warrants suicide. I -know- how bad you feel. I really, really, truly do. But you need to trust me when I say that you need to give your life a chance. What do you have to lose by waiting? Nothing. But you have EVERYTHING to gain.

What Girls Said 16

  • I think you are a spineless twit. Killing yourself over a girl. There are fucking children dying from war and you are complaining over a girl?

    I have been early kidnapped, assaulted twice, and rejected by every guy except one (did not cry the whole time), and you are crying over a girl?

    I hear everyday of innocent people being fucking murdered and all you care about is a stupid girl who probably didn't even deserve you.

    You will get rejected again, I promise you that. So either man up or never find a girl.

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    • If it bothers you so much, do something, change the fucking world, you hypocrite, oh wait, YOU CAN'T. You want to attack me for being miserable because there's other bad things in the world, then do something about them, or shut up. You think I don't want to change the world, guess what, I can't, neither can you, at least I don't have the fucking hypocrisy to call someone out on that, saying bs like "there are kids dying in war" as if I'm going to do something about it. All you did was prove my point that the world is awful, nice going, brainless twat.

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    • Exactly, because you know you're wrong, and that the only person on your side is that little fangirl yours. Go ahead, run away, you on, y ever proved me right.

    • THE ONLY ASS IS YOU. PEOPLE WHO ARE ACTUALLY SUICIDAL DO NOT WHINE TO THE WHOLE ONLINE COMMUNITY. YOU WOULD KNOW THAT IF YOU ACTUALLY HELPED THEM INSTEAD OF WHINING LIKE A LITTLE BITCH.

      You are just an attention seeking ungrateful self entitled ass.

  • How do you know that life is not worth living if you've hardly even experienced it at all? Everyone else is saying the same thing cause it's true: you are so young and have no idea what life could have in store for you. Stop arguing with everyone and listen to what we're saying. You've obviously posted this because in the back of your mind you really want help, and that's exactly what we're trying to give to you. But talking to people online aren't going to solve your problems. Get some help, go to a therapist, talk to a friend, pray for the pain to go away (even if you say you don't believe in God, he is what you truly need more than anything).

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  • I have been in your spot for so much, like literally my best guy friend lead me on, and at the end he dropped me like that, called me a bitch and what not. Believe me I was SO DEPRESSED. I would barley get up to go to the bathroom, I wanted to cry all day and night, but my friends and I literally tried to take that part of me and try to push it away. I remember trying to seem happy, I remember trying to do things to KEEP me happy, but nothing. I noticed that my happiness was controlled by a person, which is the same that's happening for you, and you're right. I'm not going to tell you that you will find someone, or that all you'll need is to find someone else, because trust me, it's so hard,, and hurts like hell. Believe me I didn't even want to hear those words, I always that 'this is all bs, God please make my heart stop aching so bad!' and I'd just cry and cry. One thing I did get used to is not having him around me anymore, literally my life revolved around him, and I'm not posting this anonymous so people can see just how I coped with everything. I know it hurts like hell, but you WILL get past this, you WILL find happiness, but find it with life not a person. Sure you can make someone part of that life, but really look at life differently, if you ever need to talk, I'm always here you can message me (: good luck!

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    • Love what you said girl, good for you! For someone so young you are very wise. Just don't invest so much in men darlin', that's the key. Develop yourself and your own life first, then the right man will come. A man can't make you truly happy but, by God, they can certainly make you miserable!

    • Thank you! I honestly did learn the hard way, it wasn't easy, but I got there. And men only bring is temporarily happiness, but some men actually put in an effort. TBH I thought that all that was just not good for me to post, but this guy obviously needed to know there are worse cases for others where they get mislead by someone they really care about, and it sucks tbh ):

  • sweet heart this a natural thing that has happened to all human being it is normal to get friendzoned i am 21 and i 've got friendzoned a few times. Yes, it hard to know that someone you have beautiful feelings for dosen't see you the same way but sometimes it happenes for a good reason, there are more fish in the sea and i bet soon a nice girl will feel the same way you feel for her, so just give it time.

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  • I know you are upset and angry, but this is life. You gain this type of experience to know how to cope with what ever comes your way in the future. Everything you want, you will not be able to have, including women. Nobody is promised to you, period. There will be other girls in the future who will look much better and have a better personality, and they will make you forget all about this girl who has broken your heart. No, you did not deserve this, but she didn't deserve you. If you gave her your heart, time, and commitment and she walked away, then she's a fool and was unable to see how great you are.
    Do not end your life or wish that you were never born because of this situation. Talk to friends, family, just distance yourself away from this girl, because all old feelings will come back.
    You are good enough for someone who deserves you. She didn't. You are still young, enjoy your life, plan for the future, and take a break pursuing right now because you should take time out to heal.

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  • I know you feel like you'll never find anyone but that's not true. The world is a huge place. Heartbreak is probably the worst emotional destruction a person can go through but dont let it break your hopes and dreams. It sucks for somebody to tell you you're not worthy but remember opinions are subjective and not everybody values the same things. You'll be valuable to somebody you like sure enough. This helped me a lot recently and hopefully it can make you at least smile inside if only ever so faintly:

    Just try to be your own best possible self and it'll get easier.

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  • You can not make a girl the center of your life you are young think about you. Don't dwell on it. don't let this control your life and the out come of it. there are plenty of other girls out there and i mean that plenty! So take a step back and realize you are so young there is time and plenty of girls.

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  • Woah listen, please don't harm yourself! Think about it, right now is tough, but pull through begin a sport put your mind to rest, get a haircut, or something show this chick whats she is missing. In a few years life will be perfect! I bet you will have lots of girl-friends probably a girlfriend who you would be so thankful to meet! Think of it, if you harm yourself this girl, you might think doesn't like you or whatever but if you do it, she will feel so guilty, upset and possibly lean into your position! You don't want that to happen! Family, imagine how hard it would be! I am telling you this as i have experienced thoughts of suicide, and still do, but what gets me through is what i will miss in years, no good times in college, the fun work partys, the fun partys spend with friends, holidays etc. Don't do it, people will miss you.

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    • Yeah, I know. Honestly, I've spent the past hour whipping myself up into psycho mode so I'd be the center of a perfect storm, and while I'm still very upset, I'm starting to calm down a bit. It's just, I want to give up on everything, but, I strangely don't at the same time.

  • Cheer up, when you're older, better looking and suave, the tables will be turned. She will be the one trying to get your attention.

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  • You should probably kill yourself, because your friend doesn't like you as more than a friend.

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    • Don't tell me something I already know.

    • Why do you ask for opinions then?

    • 13d

      Ill be honest - i hope you kill yourself faster than him.
      and please GOD let it be the most painful death you can ever have...

  • You're under 18. You don't need a relationship right now anyway.

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    • HAHA, you've never actually felt love for anything, have you?

    • Yes I have & I've always felt heartbreak. But I was strong enough to move the hell on & eventually stop crying about it.

  • You are way too young to give up now. Seriously. The good life doesn't begin until you're 30!

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    • And besides, what if she changes her mind later? You have to keep hope alive. People grow and change everyday. I know this is not how you want to show her you love her. You said you loved her.. why would you do this just because she doesn't have the same feelings for you right now? When you love someone, you set them free and if they love you, they come back. It's just the way it is for everyone. Everyone feels that pain at some point in their lives.

  • Don't be a coward.

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    • Oh please, this "don't be a coward" tripe again, how is that cowardly, what, I should live for people that couldn't give less of a shit about me? I should live for a life I never asked for? Cowardly is living even though you're miserable because you don't have the guts to end a pointless quirk of reality, being born.

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    • Bacaragirl99 if you read my next comment you would see I'm talking to him from experience that could be more helpful than everyone saying the exact same thing over and over again.

    • UglyKevin I've seen your posts girls do approach but that's not the point of this thread. He is talking about killing himself over a girl so whether you think girls never approach or anything is irrelevant.

  • It'll get better trust me and if she thinks your below her. Then she's not worth your time

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  • I was in love with my best friend for 7 years. About 4 years into it, I finally asked him how he felt. He had a girlfriend (I didn't care) and essentially friendzoned me. It was horribly painful. Horribly. Then when I broke off our friendship some years later I was actually grateful that I dropped my laptop on my foot so I could lie on the couch and concentrate on that pain.

    The thing about pain - and I've suffered from depression for 10 years - is it *goes away* God willing. My best friend broke off a friendship with a girl he loved (she got married and it was awful for him) and asked me how long - I estimated 3 days. Also, what you're saying about being a bad son etc. - pain compounds pain and I'm not surprised you're focusing on everything bad - it doesn't mean those things are true, just that you're perceiving a lot of things as bad at once. I usually pray and then cry and write it down and then kind of lie there stunned for a while and then sit in the sunshine and let it slowly seep out of me.

    It sucks. And it has always gone away thank God. The fact that it went away doesn't mean I loved him less if you're worried about that in your case. My advice is that (after, first and foremost, praying) you write down your feelings and sit in the sunshine (seriously - sunlight is like medicine) and let the pain wash over you and wash away. It might take a few days. And the sore spot may be there for a while. I don't know.

    But take it from someone who was legitimately in love for almost a decade. I was his friend, his companion... and never with him. And finally thank God I've gotten over him - I still care about him but in a person-to-person sense.

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  • Buddy, you're under 18. You got a lot of life ahead of you.

    I never kissed a guy before college. In high school no one ever asked me out, so I tried to ask the guy I like out and he friendzoned me. I get it, it sucks.

    But it's not the end of the world. You need to get some help. Go see a therapist. Call a suicide hotline. Death doesn't solve anything.

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    • It's the end of my world.

What Guys Said 11

  • At your age, everything in life is all or nothing. And your wrong if you think you're the only one who has been through what you're going through at this very moment. There are millions who have felt, thousands that feel, just as you do.

    The wrong thing to do right now would be to given in to this desire. Feed on your anger and use it as fuel to move forward. One day you'll find the fuels burnt up and something better takes it's place.

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  • I am in the same situation as you and yes I feel every thing you feel , but if you really loce her then stay as her friend and dont leave her and just wait! She will finally realize that she was wrong about you and she will love you , and even if that didn't happen then she is just not the one for you but still never stop talking to her and always treat her as a friend cuz she liked you as a friend and I know she will feel the same way as u do know if you just left her. Be strong man , I really wish that no one ever gets put in this situation

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  • Well... at least you are friends. I'll justify it.

    Years ago, I met an amazing girl but for some reason, we never introduced each other. I was too scared to, and I don't know why she didn't.
    Long and complicated story and sounds stupid, but years on, I still dream of what would've happened if we got each other's numbers, or even running into her in the future. I don't care if either would've ended in rejection, at least it would offer closure.

    I can't emphasize enough how awesome this girl was. Smart, passionate about science and ridiculously pretty but a little shy. Shyness isn't a bad thing, but it is when I'm too freaking scared of what you'll think of me.

    So basically, I was a fucking dumbass beyond anything possible. And the fact that this event has fucked me up in the head is even worse. I can't talk straight to girls who remind me of her - smart girls, girls who love science, shy girls and girls who kinda resemble her. I can't take things further with girls anymore because I haven't let go of her in my mind yet. And thinking about her has wasted so much time that I could've spent being more productive. I literally still wish she could come back into my life.

    And you'd think this'll make me never make the same mistake again, and indeed it did. But as a side effect, I'm pretty fucked up as a person now.

    Anyways, that's not the point I'm trying to make. Just know that someone out there is having it worse off than you are, and for the stupidest reason ever. I'd do anything to be promoted to your situation right now.

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    • Oh, last thing.
      I'm still an undergrad and I do still meet plenty of girls like her. Smart, passionate about science, lots of chemistry (pun not intended, but actually makes a tonne of sense) and really pretty.

      I've tried to make that argument to myself, that "there's still plenty of fish in the water" but I guess I'm too closed-minded right now.

      I'll get over it some day. But that day is not now.

    • Me, I can't bring myself to care about any girl that isn't exactly like her.

  • You 're too immature to be thinking about guns.

    There are a billion better girls just in China alone!

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  • You don't know this girl.

    You're in love with the idea of her you have in your head.

    Just being friends tells you like 1/5th of what it would actually be like dating her.

    Find a girl who wants you.

    There's no perfect girl out there and you don't need one.

    What will actually make you happy is not an amazing girl, but an amazing relationship.

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  • Okay, a lot of people here I find want to kill themselves. That sucks, at one point I felt that way too, but I found that I stopped caring for what others thought about me when I started working out, even if they turned out to be compliments. When you run and exercise, you just feel good, sex is just a useless thing sometimes.

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  • Hey, you're young. And besides, a true man wouldn't consider taking their life over a woman. Do you honestly think it's manly at all taking your life over a girl? I know guys who are very skilled with women, though they've admitted to getting rejected a lot on their road to developing good social skills. And you're under 18, you'll meet a lot more women.

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    • I already said I'm a pathetic excuse for a man.

  • well, wanna kill yourself? no ones gonna stop ya from doin it, even thought is the most coward decision ya could take. think twice dude

    peace

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    • Coward? I don't know, I doubt you have the guts to even conceptualize taking your own life, hypocrite.

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    • How does taking your life make you a coward, that means you'd have to be capable of fighting your most basic desire, the will to live. Most people couldn't even sacrifice their life for someone they love, and me, I have NOTHING to live for, I bet you have an awesome life, a bunch of friends, a girlfriend, well, I'm not you, I'm just a worthless little note, I don't have any reason to live.

    • hey dude, its not quite hard to take your own life. it just shows how weak you are to face your life's problems, and then prefer to run away from they, showing your cowardice. cmon dude, get your face up and keep up, cuz kill yourself won't make ya a hero. ya think that that girl is all in your life, but Im pretty sure ya have a family and at least ONE friend that ya actually trust and like. they would surely miss ya. stop with that 'kill myself' bullshit, and show that you're not a 'pathetic excuse' for a man, show that ya ARE a truly man, that don't run away when life looks to be falling into peaces.
      Im sure ya will look back someday and realize how stupid ya were and what opportunities ya would have ignored if ya just had killed yourself.
      Much love, dude

  • Is that it? You're just going to give up? You're still under 18 you have a long time ahead of you to fix this.

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    • Fix what, that she friendzoned me?

    • What's the point of being depressed, it will get you nowhere.

  • I agree 110%. Women and girls have no idea how easy they have it when it comes to dating. 99% of them just sit/stand there while the guy does the asking. All they girl has to do is say Yes or No. We do the approaching but its the females who have the last say. It makes me sick.

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  • NO! DON'T DO IT BRO!

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