I made my boyfriend choose between me and football, was this wrong?

So, every Sunday my boyfriend plays football and i watch him, I've been doing this since October. Today i was outside and it was freezing, and i asked my boyfriend if he could finish playing football with his mates and come hang out with me. His reply was no. Then i told him that he had a choice, either me or football. He said he isn't going to choose, so i said, if you go back over there you don't love me and i'm going home. He then chose to go play football, am i wrong for making him choose?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Very wrong.

    He has one thing he does a week, ONE THING and you can't let him do it? If it's too cold just tell him and go off to do your own thing for the day, he'd understand.

    Do every man on Earth a favor and don't enter a relationship with one.

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What Guys Said 22

  • Wow that's very wrong and immature.
    I would of broke up with you if you said that to me.
    You don't blackmail your partners he plays football on Sunday. If it's too cold for you then you leave and see him later, that's it.

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  • To challenge someone's love is inherently unfair. "If you love me you would..." Just be prepared for the following response "if you love me you wouldn't challenge my love"

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  • That's insanely immature. You don't have to go you know. He can go do something while you go do something else. You put him in a position where he's either going to look bad to his friends or bad to you.

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  • Why did you give him an ultimatum like that?

    I think the whole "if you don't do such-and-such thing, then you don't love me" sounds really childish.

    I'm not saying this to make you feel bad or anything, but maybe you can take a step back and see it this way too?

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  • Yes, you're wrong for making him choose. He shouldn't have to choose between the girl he's with and a sport he likes to play.

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  • It sounds like you waited until he was semi obligated to his game or in the middle of it handing him a ultimatum. You might try suggesting spending more time together well ahead of his game. But be prepared if he doesn't commit if the games are something he's been doing for a long time.

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  • Sorry to say but yes, it was wrong.

    You knew he played football when you got in a relationship with him. So why take that away from him? Never try and change the people you love. It will always backfire.

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  • It was immature for both of you. He should have asked what was wrong or if you guys could negotiate. Both of you are in the wrong. But you did start it.

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  • He was right by choosing football.

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  • Yes yes yes very very wrong. Instead of supporting what he loves, what a good gf should do. Your demanding he gives up something positive to be with you

    Selfish and rude. He should dump you if you continue this

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  • Yeah you're so wrong. I was in the same situation as your boyfriend, making him choose is arrogant and controlling because he gives you every other day. I'd choose football too, football is life!

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  • If you make a man choose between his passion and you, then you're a selfish cunt.

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  • no you were right basically... if he keeps playing football leave him!

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  • Good luck with your single life.

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  • Girls like you are a pain.

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  • Yes. It's rather selfish. That is not love, that is selfishness. Love is not selfish and keeps not records of wrongs. Love him.

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  • Whoa!!! not cool... not cool at all.

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  • I love sports
    dont make me chose

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  • Sorry its very wrong I gave an ex an ulimatium once slimar reasons just other way around biggest mistake i ever made i regreted it for many years it haunted me and i aslo upset them.

    Have i learnt from it oh god yes Its a hard lesson to learn.

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  • Yes, you gave him an ultimatum rather than communicate and discuss your issues like a reasonable adult would. You don't give people a "me or the highway" choice, because it's irritating enough for many people to choose the highway over someone.

    And for your situation in particular, it's something he has been doing since before you came along I assume, and only once a week at that. It's time with him and his friends to do what they enjoy. So you not only wanted to pull him away from his commitments, but you gave him an ultimatum to do so (and he did exactly what I mentioned above, he chose the "highway" in this choice).

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  • Yeah that's wrong. aren't you confident of his love for you? He likes football.. probably before he even met you and he must just change?

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  • You were right to make him choose.

    Sure, a guy can like his hobbies, but at the same time if he can't spend time to make the relationship worthwhile it's pointless. Sure, I occasionally play games, but if I had a girlfriend I can spend time with I would want to make her happy, I dislike guys like that.

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What Girls Said 18

  • Yes! My biggest pet peeve with people in relationships, is when they throw out the "you don't love me then" phrase. That's so beyond wrong! Him not wanting to give up football doesn't mean he doesn't love you, but if you make a person choose you're always going to get the opposite of the result you were hoping for. Besides, if he made you choose between him and something you loved and then stated "you didn't love him if you did that other thing instead", you wouldn't be too happy with that would you? Now, imagine how he feels.

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  • Of course you were wrong. It's one day that he enjoys hanging out with his friends and doing something he likes. Giving ultimatums to people is just petty and immature.

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  • Yes, you are absolutely 100% wrong.

    If you can't handle a situation without setting ultimatums and trying to manipulate people into getting your way, you should stay away from relationships altogether.

    You're too selfish and immature.

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  • Yeah... that's like him saying chose him or hanging with your friends? That'd make you feel like he dosent love you because he's making you chose between the 2. So I'd say apologise

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  • To be quite honest you were definitely in the wrong and bang out of order.

    No one should ever set out to change the person you are with, remember neither of you are joined at the hip, and both of you need your "Own Time".

    What you should have done was to tell him that you were feeling the cold and was therefore going off to warm up, and that you hoped he would enjoy his game and that you would see him later after he finished.

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  • Wrong. Not sure how or even if you can fix this.

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  • Yes it's wrong. You can't make your man choose between you and something he enjoys doing. His playing football with his mates. Why is that a bad thing? You really don't have to be there watching him do you? If not, you could of prevented all of that and went home.

    I would assume football is his me time. Because his around you most of the time right?

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  • Hasn't anyone ever told you that ultimatums like that are immature and basically the best way to wreck a relationship? It's only one day out of the week, ONE. Let him have his guy time.

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  • Don't give him that ultimatum. All guys need that time to hang with their mates, just like girls need girl time. You don't have to watch him if you don't like it and he should understand that too. If he's comfortable playing when it's freezing, fine... have some quality 'me' time during his game so afterwards you can share with each other your different experiences... just a thought

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  • Why not get your own Sunday activity?

    He's your bf, not your entertainment center. You have to have hobbies outside of hanging with him... and he needs to have hobbies outside of hanging with you.

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  • I hate to say it but you did kind of make a bad choice. Ultimatums rarely end the way you want them to. Guys need guy time, you could have just not gone to watch if you didn't want to.

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  • yes you were wrong.. I agree with the others..

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  • Why didn't you just dress warm if you knew he'd be going?

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  • Not the ultimatum!

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  • yes u were wrong I agree with what others said

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  • Honestly Im not trying to be mean but yeah that was kinda wrong

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  • Yes. Guys needs their bro time to spend with their friends doing guy stuff. He doesn't need to be with you 24/7. Time apart from each other sometimes is healthy for the relationship. You guys need activities outside of each other.

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  • Yea you're wrong, that was a shitty thing to make him do.

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