Why do women never give average or below average looking guys a chance?

Question

Seriously I and other guys want to know why is it always the good looking guys who get dates? All this stuff about having confidence is a sham and women use it as an excuse to give ugly, average and below average looking guys a reason not to give up what a croc of BS. Why can't they the (women) just admit they want good looking guys like this link

And not this link

I mean if confidence is nothing but an excuse, how the hell is any guy suppose to get a date or girlfriend if the girl finds the guy not to be her type?

aficionado · Accepted Answer

Hello brother. This is a valid question you have asked, and I will provide you a satisfactory solution. And I won't be rude at all, because I know very well how it feels.

I myself am a pretty average looking 27 year old guy (like I'm pretty short at 170cms or 5'7", and slightly overweight). And my face isn't what a woman would actually call attractive. And several years ago, I was in the exact same situation as you - totally depressed and unable to attract women. In fact, there was a point in my life where my confidence was so low that I even considered plastic surgery to alter the appearance of my face. And of course, I never asked any girl out because I was sure of her rejecting me. And like you, I too firmly believed that women only date good looking guys.

Then I realized that there's no use if I keep whining about my looks, and instead I have to find a way of making up for it. That's when I became a total gentleman. I began expressing a lot of kindness towards my female friends, helping them out when they had problems and lending them a shoulder to cry on. Of course, I wasn't doing this just to attract them, because I was equally kind and helpful towards my male friends as well. I completely discarded swear words from my vocabulary, and also gave up using any kind of vulgar/profane language. I also used to crack jokes often, and make the girls giggle.

Please note, I never worked in improving my looks, but instead concentrated on transforming myself into a kind and confident man, with a bit of humor. And you'll be surprised to know the result. I myself never asked any girl out, but SEVEN girls themselves asked me out at various points of my life. Out of those seven, 2 were super hot, 3 were quite pretty and the remaining 2 were above average. That means, in spite of me being average looking (or perhaps below average), the girls who asked me out were never average or below average.

I agree that some women are shallow enough to date a man only based on his looks (there are such shallow men as well), but I can confirm that such women are the minority. Most women only want a kind and confident man (sometimes with a good sense of humor), and once they get the feeling that their life will be secure with you, your job's done. It is quite easy to win a woman's heart if you just know the way of speaking with her. The most important thing here is that you have to behave in such a way that she gets the impression that your primary objective is 'love' and not 'sex'. Just be kind towards a girl, support her during her hard times, make her laugh, and treat her with respect (rather than a sexual object), and you'll melt her heart sooner than you think. And its really not as hard as it seems, trust me.

If you need any further help regarding this, you can message me on this site, or feel free to email me on funkyzoom@outlook.com, and I'll gladly oblige. If you feel that I have helped you at least 1%, please select mine as the best answer.

Cheers, brother! :)

TheGoodTheBadTheHOT · Accepted Answer

Let me present you a counter question.

Why do men never give average or below average looking guys a chance?

Equally preposterous, I know. But replace the word "never" with 'usually' and both questions are valid.

We're wired to aim high. Try to maximise our offsprings ginetic inheritance, and that doesn't mean going for the coals amongst the diamonds. Both sexes try hitting above their weight and then complain when it doesn't go their way and then in turn begin to blame it on the oposite sex. Eventually realism kicks in and peoples standards drop.

Yes, attraction is a fundimental building block of a relationship. But it is not the 'be all and end all' of it. No, there is much more (confidence, personality etc)

But at the same time, yes, women to spew verbal diaorehha about how its all about confidence and personality. Women are just as visual as men (if not moreso), its just not quite accepted by society yet (aka: other women) to be honest about this fact. Its just not ladylike.

If you're not succeeding, you're doing something wrong. As such, you need to work on it and improve yourself to compensate for where you're failing. Ie; a tan, new haircut, better clothes, exercise. The list goes on. Chances are the fault is with you, not with an entire gender.

china-blue · Accepted Answer

Don't you think you'll find your poll a bit skewed by not having a "women don't only want good looking guys" option? During my dating life I gave average or below average looking men more attention than the good looking men. In my experience, most every good looking man that I dated was an a$$hole, thinking they could get away with anything because they believed a woman should be honored just to be seen with them. I avoided these preening d!cks after learning how it was with them. It took me quite a while, but I finally found a man with a soul. Is he good looking? To me, he's gorgeous. Would other women think so, I don't know and I certainly don't care. But his looks are secondary to the fact he's just what I was looking for.

girlinblue017 · Accepted Answer

TBH, women have different tastes. For example, there are some guys that I find attractive that my friends think aren't, and there are some they find attractive that I'm not really a fan  of. So there's that for physical attraction. And also, personality, sense of humor, and interests matter. I know a lot of guys think that girls only use looks as basis for a relationship, but that's not true. The guy I'm attracted to right now isn't my type, looks-wise, but we have the same wavelength, the same interests, and he's really funny and sweet. My friends have been telling me he's really not great-looking, and I admit that, but we click.

AnnabelLee · Accepted Answer

Of course women want good looking guys. Don't guys want good looking girls too?! But people's perception on looks differ a lot. Also, looks is not all that counts. Charm, brains, sense of humor, style and self care are also really important.

A guy who has a way with words, has read a lot, knows how to dress his body type, how to tell a good joke, and cares about his health and looks?! Damn, even if he's not good looking, he becomes to our eyes. And this kind of guy rocks a girl's world more than a beautiful brainless douche.

Anonymous · Answer

Confidence sham? Nope, sorry that's not correct.

If that where true then I should of had no girlfriends when I was younger, and tons of girls when I was a bit older. Because I was extremely confident when I was young and had several GFs, but then because of life tragedies, I lost a lot of it, and even though I got better looking, what else happened? I raraly had any girls show interrest in me. Then again in the past couple years I gain much more confidence again, and am back to the good old days.

Ok so who doesn't want a good looking partner? In fantasy of course they do. And lots of women DO want a good looking guy, but for the majority or at least half it is not like that. Unless the girl herself is a model, she's doesn't want a model boyfriend because it makes her feel less attractive and self conscious.

Fact is, confidence, personality, social status, social awareness, or money, outway looks. If it didnt, then this book having helped me is just a big fat placebo that actually worked: link

normalice · Answer

judging by your poll options, it's clear you're only here to confirm your bias. Instead of doing that, I'll just ask you a question:

could your question be more accurately worded "why do above-average looking women never give average or below average looking guys a chance?" If so, I'm going to have to ask why you aren't interested in the interests of average or below-average looking women. hmm.

anyway, what people find attractive is the one thing immune to charges of racism, bigotry, elitism, and ignorance. It hurts no one to not find someone attractive, but it does hurt someone to try to force others to find you attractive.

washize · Answer

Because SOME average or below average looking guys, don't have the personality or any other qualities to make up for their lack of good looks.

and they always have a bad attitude and disdain for women.

They themselves, wouldn't bother with an average or below average looking woman.

Guys who assume all they need is money and good looks to get a woman, fall very very short of reaching the vagina.

LindaKen · Answer

First of all, looks are subjective. I like "fat", blond, blue-eyed guys. Don't ask me why I don't know why but I always end up with them, and my friends think they look horrible, and then the guys that my friends go out with are really not my taste, like that guy's picture you linked, to me he doesn't attract me AT ALL. So yeah, it's all about taste really...

But if I'm completley honest, girls like a bit of cockiness in guys, more like confidence, a "hot" guy who is shy, and always miserable is not attractive in any way, even if he looks like Brad Pitt. But if a guy even if he's not that attrative, has a little attitude, and confidence, humour, gets the conversation going, and nice (he HAS to be nice),etc.. Then yeah we will be more attracted to him, and I think it's the same for girls

RedSmartie · Answer

Actually, studies have shown that women have a more varied taste in what's attractive while men are more likely to agree. link link

Therefore, it's more likely that a woman will be single because she doesn't fit the perfect mold of what's attractive to men, rather than the other way around.

You and the other little boys like you on this website need to get your heads out of your asses and stop bitching about women (who are most likely really attractive and fit the male "standard") not liking you because of the way you look. It's much more likely that they don't like you because you're insecure misogynists.

AveryBeck · Answer

I'm sorry, are you new to the world? Attraction has played a large key part on all continents since the beginning of time. You may not realize it, but we are all subconsciously programmed to find the most fit, facial proportional, sexually appealing mates. Even when babies were brought around random people, they always favored the most attractive faces. So to get back to your topic, Woman don't give average men a try because they are searching for that more proportional mate. It's not me talking, it's genetics. Why do you think so many guys get bummed out when their slammed into the friend zone? The are not attractive enough to their counterparts, that's it. Also- the Hollywood scene glorifies beautiful people constantly, making you think that these people are everywhere in society, when in all reality people are just average looking.

The simple answer? It's all about looks, as shallow as that sounds.

kitkat1991991 · Answer

I have never heard of this anywhere but on this site. lol where I live if a guy has personality and/or money that is more than looks. It seems like you do not have a very high opinion on women and they can pick up on it. This will turn women away from you. I see not great looking guys get cute girls all the time.

Lala93 · Answer

A lot of girls are shallow, and judge a book by its cover. Not all girls are like that though, and looks are subjective. What's beautiful to one person may not be to another. But yeah, as a girl myself, I see a lot of girls picking hot douches, and then wonder why they aren't treated right.

TheGodEmperorLeto · Answer

Most women are as shallow as men. Society as a whole needs to grow the f*** up and stop being so shallow.

kairon156 · Answer

this is a onesided pool.

it is true that people in general want goodlooking people to date but I've seen girls with guys who were less attractive than they were and my first thoughts are "good for him/them"

UberTroll · Answer

I've seen plenty of girls with average looking guys. I've dated quite a few of em myself and even a couple of below average guys. So it's definitely not always the good looking guys who get dates. In fact I see more good looking women with average men than the other way around. Your problem might come from something besides looks.

blackwaterhattie · Answer

Yes, you are trying to be a jerk and you are doing an AWESOME job of it. GO YOU.

I'm going to sort of answer you, here- and then I am going to go away and not read any more of this sh*t because it's silly. Here goes: it's not your looks. It's your sh*tty personality. You're an entitled, whining brat. You think because you are interested in a woman- ANY woman- that she owes you some attention. WRONG! Women don't owe you a goddamn thing, broseph. OH, DOESNT THAT SUCK?

Hamburgers · Answer

Women are ashamed of what they're attracted to.

There's two things:

1) What society expects them to be attracted to: Nice, caring, romancing, secure.

2) What she's biologically attracted to: Looks, money, status, power, being dominated.

For males, "confidence" is a result of #2.

In other words, women aren't attracted to confidence. Confidence is merely an INDICATOR that the male has good genes, social status, resources, and power.

windyCitysFinest · Answer

jaded toward women much because you got rejected one too many times?

Hamburgers · Answer

Women find you attractive...If they can get stuff from you.

Not because of looks, QA..

Translations:

Guy who is ambitious = Money I can spend, be taken care of, and my offspring.

Sense of humor = Dopamine neurochemicals. You are a hit of a drug, targeting the pleasure centers of my brain.

Socially savvy = He increases my social status among my peers.

Etc.

Looks play a part, but mostly women just want someone they can take from. Attain these things and you will be perceived as attractive.

mona89 · Answer

Are you kidding me I don't where you live but where I live I see gorgeous women with average/below average guys all the time. Not all girls go for good looking guys. And both of those guys in the picture were good looking. Some women have different tastes. Usually its the average / below average  looking guys that seem to lack confidence.

Anonymous · Answer

If this were true, only very good looking men would have relationships. And they aren't the only ones, so... Haha! Looks are simply a bonus, for me. They aren't a standard.

jacquesvol · Answer

For the same reason guys never give average or below average looking girls a chance. It goes both ways.

spassticer · Answer

most men won't date below average women either. if a man had a choice between a hot chick and a OK chick, the hot chick wins every time. no matter what

beeblo · Answer

Seen plenty of average/below average guys with above average women

Why do women never give average or below average looking guys a chance?

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