Guys, how many rejections do you go through, on average, before you find a girl who says yes? Even then, how many dates before a relationship?

I'm curious what the ratio of failure is for most guys. I don't approach girls often because I'm just not motivated most of the time because I figure the chance of success is so minuscule compared to the probability of failure.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You have to make sure the situation is appropriate. From my experience I almost never get success from stopping girls on the street or subway. If she does give me the number it's usually to get rid of me just because the interaction seemed forceful. On the other hand, when its in places like the gym, coffee shops, mall/retail stores, I tend to have more success. 2:5

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What Girls Said 1

  • I wouldn't know, because I have never approached a person.

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    • Thanks for that totally useless response.

    • Show All
    • Girls always play a safe waiting game. So safe to say u dont face rejection befre getting into relationships

    • Yes, because crippling social anxiety that causes you to deprive yourself of almost any human interaction, unless the person comes up to you first (and, if they do they generally want to bang you, or that anxiety makes you think they're making fun of you) is totally wonderful. And, then having people call you a bitch, or some other super fun thing because somebody creeps you out, or you're just not into them, is even more grand. And, I mean, if you're asking a girl out, maybe you need to ask yourself how you come off. But, at the end of the day, as I said, whether you initiate or not, it's extremely difficult (and, unless, you're in my position or I'm in yours, neither of us can judge who has the more difficult time).

What Guys Said 7

  • Barring one (the 1st one) back in my teens, no rejections whatsoever.

    Failure most times comes after a lengthy relationship lol.

    In one case it was instant not even a date required but generally it's about 5 - 10 dates maybe.

    If you stay demotivated it will only worsen, pep yourself up. You are working on your downfall with this mindset, be optimistic and focussed

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  • Welll at the club, the ratio is 1 out of 3-4 girls typically of all the ones i approach but sometimes i get approached. Go to the club bud

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    • Do these encounters amount to anything more than flings? I have a hard time imagining meeting a girl at a club resulting in a relationship, which is what I want more than sex.

    • I've gotten numbers and gone on 2 dates with one of the girls so it is possible, i mean if anything its just practice for the woman you do want to date, you dont have to sleep with any of the girls at the club if you dont want too

  • From 5-13 I've always wanted a girlfriend, never knew how to get one and failed..20 times? when im 13 i get a girlfriend because while playing truth or dare with her and friends we are dared to make out with eachother. She asks me to walk her home and on our way there she asks to kiss me again. after that we are pretty much together and she said it was because im a sweet guy and a really good kisser. after awhile i start to overthink things and freak out and break up with her because i thought she was cheating on me. (kissing and going out with someone else, not sex i am a virgin) so then it dawns on me how stupid i was and I decide that im no good at relationships and give up on them completly. 4 years realtionship and crush sober!

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  • I don't really approach that many people so it's hard to say. I find that I usually get the girl I really want. But maybe I go for women that I feel pretty certain are interested in me too. Haha.

    How many dates before a relationship? Hard to say. I like seeing someone and getting to know them for a little while before making that leap. Maybe like a couple months?

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  • I don't approach much but I'm modestly successful. I've only been turned down by a few that were already spoken for which I didn't know and I think 1 other. Id say (including the spoken for ones) I've been turned down 1/3 of the time. As far as time between meeting and being exclusive, that varies but anywhere from maybe 3 weeks to 3 months.

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  • On an average at least we go through 2 to 3 girl rejections before we settle down with our special one

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  • Personally... a lot. I mean I don't approach much, but when I have for fun to kinda get it out of my system. I'd say I fail quite a lot... I don't know if I can give a number. But it's pretty high up there.

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    • Has it changed over time or was it always a high rate of failure?

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