I'm 23 and highly embarrassed of my family's current financial situation. I'm unemployed, so I feel like this doesn't leave me room to talk since I just got out of college and can't support myself.
When I was growing up I never lacked for anything; in fact, I was quite spoiled. Now I know that my family was simply living well above their means. My mom is divorced and lives with 2 of her 3 sisters, one of whom is also divorced with an autistic son who depends on her. So it's always been my mother, 2 of my aunts, and 1 cousin living in the same house.
When I was a kid my mother never worked. Now she's a bus driver even though she has a college degree. Honestly, I'd be happier if she were a stripper - they make more money than she does. My aunt is disabled and on a fixed income, and gets most of her money from her ex-husband, to support their son. My other aunt hasn't been able to work for a few years because someone has to constantly take care of my grandfather, who has COPD. So that basically makes us poor, because once the bills are paid there's little left over for anything else. The aunt who doesn't live with us has to help us out all the time.
I think what makes it worse for me is that my family is in denial of how badly off we actually are. They insist that we are middle class just because we live in a middle class neighborhood. My mother gets offended when I admit that I'm embarrassed of her job. I never have a sense of stability because I always feel like we're going to lose the house, which we only rent, not own (it's happened before already). Almost everyone I know has parents who actually ARE middle-class and can help them out when they need it, and I would trade the childhood I had for a family who could help me out now, in a heartbeat.
I hate resenting my family for the way things are but I don't know how not to. Does this make me a brat, or would others feel this way in my shoes?
When I was growing up I never lacked for anything; in fact, I was quite spoiled. Now I know that my family was simply living well above their means. My mom is divorced and lives with 2 of her 3 sisters, one of whom is also divorced with an autistic son who depends on her. So it's always been my mother, 2 of my aunts, and 1 cousin living in the same house.
When I was a kid my mother never worked. Now she's a bus driver even though she has a college degree. Honestly, I'd be happier if she were a stripper - they make more money than she does. My aunt is disabled and on a fixed income, and gets most of her money from her ex-husband, to support their son. My other aunt hasn't been able to work for a few years because someone has to constantly take care of my grandfather, who has COPD. So that basically makes us poor, because once the bills are paid there's little left over for anything else. The aunt who doesn't live with us has to help us out all the time.
I think what makes it worse for me is that my family is in denial of how badly off we actually are. They insist that we are middle class just because we live in a middle class neighborhood. My mother gets offended when I admit that I'm embarrassed of her job. I never have a sense of stability because I always feel like we're going to lose the house, which we only rent, not own (it's happened before already). Almost everyone I know has parents who actually ARE middle-class and can help them out when they need it, and I would trade the childhood I had for a family who could help me out now, in a heartbeat.
I hate resenting my family for the way things are but I don't know how not to. Does this make me a brat, or would others feel this way in my shoes?
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