How to fix a broken friendship with my old best guy friend/crush (Long but please read)?

Me and my old guy friend, both 17, were best friends for about 2 years We hung out on the weekends, in the summer, had everything in common and we were always laughing and had tons of inside jokes. We told each other everything, had tons of fun together, ran in the same circle of friends, referred to each other as best friends, and were always picking on each other . He used to tell me about how he'd defend me if anyone ever tried to hurt me, how he wanted to stay friends after high school and we never got bored of each other. I guess I should mention I was also head over heels in love with the guy too.

So, at the beginning of the school year LAST year, this joke started going around school that me and him should date, and it escalated to people making sex jokes about us and asking “what we did together last night“. I denied it all and laughed at the idea (since I thought he didn‘t feel the same way), but he played along with it, jokingly called me his girlfriend and laughed along with the jokes.

Right after that started, he started treating me really rudely, ignored me when I talked to him, and we never hung out anymore even though I tried to make plans. It seemed to me like he did like me, and since I vehemently denied all the dating jokes, he was pushing me away since it seemed I didn’t like him back. I guess it all snowballed from there. Since I was getting all that rudeness from him, I decided to do it back for a change instead of trying to please him. So I started ignoring him too and being rude whenever he made a joke about me. We went from talking every day to head nods.

That all happened well over a year ago. We haven’t had a good conversation in a long time. We talked a little at the beginning of this school year, just polite, 10 minute conversations on msn. We never see each other at school anymore, except for last week. He waved me over in the hallway, and started talking to me. I asked him why he suddenly decided I was OK to talk to, and he said that we “talk all the time”. Right. Then he told me he’d found the old Christmas gift I gave him 2 years ago, and I laughed. We talked for a while longer and it felt exactly like old times, and he looked at me differently than he ever did before.

This whole situation breaks my heart. I never wanted this friendship to turn out this way, talking every few months in the hallway. We’re graduating in a few months and then I’ll probably never see him again. What the H*LL should I do? I feel like there’s so many pent up emotions that it’s too difficult to sort out. I don’t want to be the typical emotional girl and ask him to talk to me about it, so I’m at a loss. I was thinking of giving him this painting I made that he always loved, and giving him at grad, expressing all of this. I don’t want to leave high school without ever telling him I loved him. Is that a good idea? Do you think he DID like me back?


Most Helpful Girl

  • You need to straight up talk to him, let him know how you feel and that you never wanted you two not to be best friends. If he wants to fix things, he'll listen and let out his side of the story too. You two can figure out what went wrong and how to fix it. and if you don't really want to talk to him, then give him the painting and just have a note attached to it saying how you didn't want things to be awkward and whatnot. I hope this helps you, but talking is really the only way to fix things. I know cause me and my guy best friend got into a huge fight over some drama this other girl created. now I haven't talked to him or seen him in about 2 months. But I do hope your problem does get fixed.


What Guys Said 2

  • you became hot/cold to him so now the relationship is in this awkward bubble until you turn things around...essentially, you denied your feelings to him so now you need to undue that

  • Maybe he didn't like the idea of you two being in a relationship, and he pulled away to deal with the jokes etc...he liked you as a freind not as a romantic relaitnship


What Girls Said 2

  • this exact thing is happening to me. me and my guy friend used to hug everyday then I told him I like him and he said our friendship wasn't going to get ruined but now we don't hug anymore but we still talk but I feel like our friendship is getting ruined so it depends the type of person he is just ask someone else to ask him if he ever had feelings for you if he didn't don't tell him if he did I think you should tell him. boys and girls that are best friends always end up liking each other and dating