What stops white guys from dating black girls?

I am a black female who is attracted to all races of men. I find it very interesting, though, that white men are most reluctant to date black girls. In fact, men in general are becoming more and more hesitant to court us. Why is that? Lack of attraction? Fear? Social stigmas?Please respond :]

Updates:
thanks for the input :]
 

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • A lot of white guys assume black girls want black guys and black guys only which isn't necessarily true. I'm black and I've always been more attracted to white guys, my friends are absolutely amazed on the rare occasion when I see a black guy and go, "Oh he's cute." But I've always been more attracted to white guys, couldn't tell you why. In pre-school I used to run around with some little blonde hair blue eyed boy and we'd tell people we were going to get married. Some white guys also assume that most black girls will act "ghetto" which isn't at all true. Then there's also the fear of random black guys getting mad for white guys dating "their women." The fear of meeting a black girls family can be in there too. With interracial relationships there's always the fear of people saying something but really your relationship is really none of their business.But it's not just the guys who'll wind up with rude comments it's the girls too. When I tell people I'm more attracted to white guys than black guys I've heard everything from, "What, you think you're too good to date a black guy," to being told that I'm a traitor to my race which is absolutely ridiculous. Some people ask me if it's just "ghetto" black guys that I don't like and are amazed when I tell them no. I know plenty of well educated black men and I just don't find them attractive, I'm just way more attracted to white guys than I am black guys, it's as simple as that

    • I really understand what you are saying. I have dated interracially and I too prefer black women. I however, haven't found women to be acting "too ghetto" though. I've found more political differences than I have cultural. I too have found a little animosity from black men because I've dated a black woman. But, it wasn't overbearing. That could be related to the area of the country, I'm not sure. Nevertheless, where I'm from, I think there is more animosity from white women.

    • The black guys getting defensive is definitely real. I dated a black girl in college, and I was stunned how many black guys would try to take her from me whenever we were out in public. these guys came out of the woodwork. It really seemed to bother them to see a black girl with a white guy.Of course it was probably only a minority of the black guys, I would never claim all black guys acted that way. But there was a noticeable pattern.

    • I am half Asian and half white and I dated white and black girls and black girls don't seem to be so, pseudo social conscious like white girls. B girls just seem to be more down to earth not to mention great (the best) in bed and if you can satisfy an african american girl then you're doing something right. If you want to see some of the most beautful women in the world go to Norfolk State U. An African American college with educated most beautiful girls on the planet which are black.

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What Guys Said 87

  • 35d

    lack of black girls in my area

  • 47d

    This is something I've been really interested in. I'm a Hispanic male and I'm attracted mostly to Hispanic and white females. Everyone now and then I'll see a black or Asian woman who is striking, but I'm just attracted to what I'm attracted to. I think there's two factors at work - 1. What you grow up around, and 2. Popular media.

    The more I go the more I think that popular media portrayals of white women as the prize just kinda shapes male attraction, regardless of the male's background. If you look around - white, black, Hispanic, Asian men - they all really want white women. I'm not saying it's because white women are more beautiful. I'm saying it's because our culture - TV, movies, ads - they've taught us that certain types of features (smaller facial features, colored eyes, lighter skin) are more beautiful than others, and white women are usually the ones with those features. It goes reverse as well - white men are the most desired subgroup. Black boys and Hispanic boys grow up watching pretty white girls be the heartthrobs or the grand prize, so we end up with that notion. I'm of course very attracted to Hispanic girls because that's what I grew up around too, but yep, to answer your specific question: white guys are in general more attracted to white girls, like most guys are. This goes double for white guys though because they also grew up around white girls.

  • 3mo

    I don't know, I have a thing for a black girl I know but she only likes black guys (so many bad boyfriends and I'd treat her like a queen... at least, a queen on a limited budget) anyway, maybe it's not your race, have you tried examining your approach? seeing what shape you are in? and maybe if you find a nice guy who treats girls well and is single, just come out and ask him out, you'd be AMAZED how many guys are good, honest, caring, demons in the sack etc... but are just too shy to come out with it.

  • I think maybe in the beginning there is a little social stigma fear. However, times have changed or should I say the pendulum has swung. What I have experienced is, that it's not about love anymore, but what can he do for me, can he afford my tastes, is he going to conform, is he hangin 10? I know for myself, my concerns are similar in that, is she going to accept our differences and respect me as well? Or is it all going to be about me giving in 100% to her, is she going to hold my heart in her hand and protect it the same as I will? I know I feel that it is difficult for me to approach a black woman for fear of rejection because I may not be hip and into Jay z and BeyoncĂ©. I don't thing the racial make up matters so much in these concerns and relationships anymore as much as mutual respect and mutual love. I know when I fall in love, I take the vows of commitment to heart and honor those with all I have. We just want the same in return...and you'll have us wrapped around your finger forever!

  • first,the fake hair turns a lot of guys off..they like girls with long real hair and not frizzy/also MOST white guys date within their own race ...that's what most of them were raised around mostly and are comfortable with.they don't date for the sake of being diverse,they date who they're most comfortable with...they don't decide "hey,i'm going to date somebody that's outside my own race,because it;s being diverse..they date based on appearance and who they're going to be comfortable with dating/if they've never dated outside they're own race ,they're not likely to decide to start dating for the sake of being diverse//that's kind of absurd really./ I've been told that I'm too narrow minded and that dating only within my race is discrimination..of course it is..if I prefer coffee over tea,i'm being discrminitory /dating only whites like myself is being disriminatory in the way of being preferential ..but not racist..Most white males,like most blacks,asians etc,date within their own race..that's a fact/ I remind people that say it's racism or discrimination in a racist manner to look up the words "preference","racism" and "discrimination" as they obviously don't understand the differences/many people don't date chubby or fat girls..this is preference again.. recent studies show that most people date and eventually marry within their own race//the most ridiculous thing I ever heard is that nobody should base the decision to date someone based on their appearance or looks(fat,skinny,tall,short,skin color,etc)..that's claiming nobody has the right to have preference.and that's just plain idiotic./most people don't date for the sake of being diverse..period./most people have preferences of some sort/regardless of what the media potrays(tv shows,movies and celebrity realtionships).most people date solely insidetheir own race(don't base hollywood celebrities' interracial relationships as being the typical..) most white men date within their own race,because they're white..it' s what they were raised around or with mostlymost people date within their own race/it's just that simple/no big mystery

  • Different guys have different ideas of what they find attractive in a woman. I knew a white guy who would only date Black women, which kind of made it funny because I only dated Asian or Hispanic women and generally when guys, especially White guys would see us walk in a restaurant or club on a double date, they would automatically assume that his date (the Black woman) would be my date and my date (the Asian woman) would be his date. You should see the amount of white guys who would drop their jaws in disbelief one New Years Eve party we attended. Furthermore, it seems that they were not happy about the situation and would have preferred it to be that I was with his date and not with mine.

  • I like black girls but It is rare to see one who dresses like a skater chick or alternative rock clothes. I don't like any girls that dress like they ghetto! I'm not that into hip hop altough I like some of it. I don't like people that can't sit still long enough to have a thought! I like black people that are into different cultures but to be honest, I don't like black culture at all! Good news you don't have to have any culture you don't want. And if you like rock music or wanna hang out with skater guys then that is black culture since you are black and it's your culture so that would be cool black culture. White peopl for the most part are not so concerned with being cool. I dated this girl who used to date black guys and she acted like everything in the world was a competition. I don't want to have to compete I just wanna chill an do my thing.

    • 1mo

      Im a black girl love rock music and alternative too... I only reallylike white guys..its just what im attracted to...i always get shuned cuz i act "too white" I've been call "confused" and an "oreo" since i was 9yrs old. I am NEVER ghetto and hate when people see me they think that since im black that i will automatically act so called "ghetto". I've also heard that white guys think black girls are too "aggressive"...what does that even mean? Does it mean that black girls come on to strong or that we just dnt take that much shit?

  • Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, I don't know, but I know where it isn't, on a black girl. Maybe it is because I am a white guy, but black girls are the least attractive of all races to me. Sorry, but that is just my taste.

    • 35d

      It's not cause you are a white guy cause lots a white guys like black girls. there is nothing wrong with us we just have a different skin tone. Seriously have you ever heard dont judge a book by its cover? You can have you opinions on people, but if you dont like us, dont involve yourself in this. no one cares for ur "cracker" opinions.

  • nOOO girl the single reason is that he is afraid that you black male friends beat him up! no effence :D

  • I know this is an old post, but I just have to respond.Black girls generally don't take well to compliments about their curvatures. Say something about their big beautiful butt and they'll slap you.Too hostile, too aggressive, by nature it seems. Not a whole lot of ladylike civility in a woman who responds to a compliment in such a way.

    • Nothing wrong with staring. You don't like it, then learn to ignore it. That's the CIVIL thing to do. Saying, "Ya better get off ma face else someding' bad gonna happen to you!" is completely unladylike when told "You have a nice ass." I told her to go eff herself after that and she just scoffed. Now your response to me is proof how some women are just too stuck up and overly conceited. Try relaxing into the world for a change, stop acting like such b$tches.

    • .. So, a 'civil' lady is supposed to drop a napkin and adore you for staring at her big ass? It also depends on HOW you said it. I.E, "Love that fat ass or yours, sexy." Is not, shall not, and never be the same as, "Cute butt!" or, "Hello. How are you?" >>;

  • Predator

  • Lots of white guys just lack the confidence to approach. That goes for girls of any color.

  • Lots of white guys love black women. I think Black women are very hot and super sexy. Some white guys do like black girls but may be hesitant of rejection. Other white guys have other silly reasons for hesitation but if you just talk to them, A white guy will melt in your arms. I don't think it has to do with lack of attraction or any sorta stigmas but fear of rejection may be on the list.

  • lack of attraction

    • you are a loser defintly

  • Couple thoughts:media white men see is mostly a certain type of white woman. So not just black, but size, and such.Intimidation - women tend to be more free thinking, and have less peer pressure. Also may get more support form friends when they date a litle different than they have in past. I think the culture may be intimidating as well. Things tend to go in runs. Like older guys with younger women, but not younger guys with older women. That seems to have changed quite a bit. I assume you will see that change as well. Awful lot of beautiful black women I have caught myself checking out when Girlfriend not looking. :)

  • This is sad but true. I come from a culture where men are generally brown (not very dark like South Indians, but brown). Even in our culture, the first criteria to consider a girl attractive is her being fair. So I think part of the answer is that somehow, color of skin is associated with being pretty.But with respect to "black" females, there are probably some other factors that go against them.

  • black woman are the best..

  • I like some black girls. But I prefer White or Hispanic.

  • i love black girls! they are fine as hell and if you live in tampa fl hit me up at davidnowak88@excite.com

  • I forget which comedian said it, but they said "Black girls just don't think white guys are attractive." Maybe that's why? I don't know. I think there are some amazingly beautiful black girls! Just hasn't happened I suppose.

    • Cris rock said it and its true for a lot of my friends but not for me

    • Well that comedian was completely wrong

  • I'm mixed first of allI find it laughable that you are so clueless as to why men in general don't want black women...Look at this: link The plain, honest truth is that Black Women are not desirable. They have not made them selves desirable and will not listen to anyone that dare suggest they change their ways. Weight is probably the #1 issue. If they weren't all fat, then maybe a few more guys might put up with them.Also, they act like men, for the most part. They want to act tough like a man. They flaunt themselves too much; have an inflated sense of confidence. Too much attitude. Too much drama.This is coming from a guy that grew up around them. I've been to 4 different schools and have experienced the same thing with them over and over...same loud, obnoxious tones of voice. Same drama, same attitude, which doesn't bode well especially for girls who don't look that great to begin with. And they don't have natural hair many times, have to wear weave, which isn't a good thing...I want a girl with natural hair. Most guys doThen after high school I worked with an all-black female staff at a Starbucks...same crap. Same stuff that they do in school, etc. Same big bellies, same attitudes to go with itAm I saying all? I'm not saying the majority, but the overwhelming majority. Take any 10 random black girls, 9 out of 10 will be fat and have some kind of chip on their shoulder. I wish they all could be Ashanti or more like Rashida Jones, I really do. But their ego's are too big for that.

    • jessikaelise I have to agree with you fully this here is some f***n uncle tom for sure...u mixd have problms

    • I am Interracial, Black and cherokee (well, my dad is half, so it counts... LOL) I agree with you 10,000,000%! I live in the detroit area and when I actually lived IN Detroit, I was herrassed because I don't screw and smoke marijuana! In fact, most of the women in that area had 4 kids, playing at least 2 guys and was high half the time! UNATTRACTIVE! I don't even date black women... I prefer asian or hispanic...

    • I totally agree with you. I'm mixed too and find most black girls embarrassing. I once worked with all black women at a Beauty shop and it was the worst group of loud, obnoxious, fat, lazy (I could go on) people I have ever been around. Sometimes I hate saying I'm half black. Luckily most people can't tell and just think I"m Latina!

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  • I am just not interested in black girls that much...i do not find them that attractive to me. Not that they are not pretty I am just not attracted.

  • Easy peasy, it has to do with where a person was born and the culture influence. For example, if persons were born in a black enviroment like in Africa, they will like black. However, some exceptions happen and media play a major role.

    • That could be it, but what's strange is that that's changing here in africa, I'm a south african black girl ( live in jhb) and because we are so mixed in schools and social situations, I see no problem in dating a white man. the differences in culture are what make for an interesting change....

  • I'd argue it's a result of social stigma, that being the primary reason.

  • Generally it's a lack of attraction toward them. there are a few here and there, but generally speaking just doesn't do it for me. kind of difficult to explain.

  • Well I personally find that I have ebony fever so idk

  • I'd like to answer a question with a question. Why do so many black women get so offended when a Black Man is interested or is dating a white woman? Seriously think about it, it might answer your question.Answer: Perhaps white men are on your side?

    • I think that perhaps some black women get offended because generally speaking many of them don't necessarily find white men attractive, therefore, with many black men dating white women it leaves little selection for them to date black men - that's the general consensus in my experience anyway.

  • no offence but I m kinda honest personi guess for me its less attraction

    • Im black and not naturaly attracted to black men its just been like that scince birth I supppose

    • Donno its just naturally I am not attracted to black girls .can't help it

    • Why you think that ?

  • For one thing, it's quite dangerous since many black men won't tolerate us making a move on 'their' women. Of course, no one ever objects to them flirting with Caucasian women because then we'd be racist, etc., But of course they're not racist, just ask them, they'll tell you.Secondly, most of them, like their role models among wealthy Caucasian women, are simply for sale, and that's not really very attractive unless you're into that scene.

  • Now let say that I'm crazy about black women as I wrote on some other posts but I want to answer the question from my observations. I can imagine that besides social stigma, some are afraid of landing a volatile chick like Foxy Brown. Foxy is of course the exception but people don't always make choices on facts rather sometimes it is what they have seen in the news etc. And you don't learn about other people if you just stay around people just like you.

    • Wow! the states seem to have some strange black ladies! foxy brown hahahahahahaha....

    • Yeah I think Wildfire is totally on point. I was crazy about a black girl in kindergarten and now I see her where I work. Funny stuff.

  • I find black women attractive and I will approach and be nice to black women.BUTit is difficult to relate to black women, I think it has something to do with education and culture. For instance last year I was fooling around with an african girl, and whenever I told her about my life and what my day was like or my interests she could not understand it. Its a shame the education system down there is so bad.

    • Not really every one is different every family has different values and even outcomes so that?s not really true I'm sure it?s a white guy that?s been threw something or similar to a black guys and a black girl to a white girl were all different but we all can relate in som kind of way!!!! But I respect your Honesty !!!

  • I've dated black girls. There are some I find attractive and others I don't... for a number of reasons.I'm not partial to really kinky hair on girls - whether they're redheads from Scotland or brunettes from Cameroon.I don't prefer coarse facial features on a girl - whether she's from Estonia, Italy or the Congo delta.It is the same with girls of each ethnic background and every conceivable combination. I'm sure women have the same sets of personal preferences and that they vary broadly person to person.Each person has their own baggage. I don't think there's a universal explanation for the phenomenon you perceive.

  • First and foremost intimidation. Social stigmas, maybe, but the young people today are becoming more open-minded to dating other races.

    • actually not..studies show that most people still date within their own race..do not base what you see in the movies or on TV shows on reality.interracial relationships are NOT even near the norm statistically.you only see a really high percentage of interracil relationships among hollywood celebrities.those relationships do not reflect the social norm'

  • Black women have on average larger vaginas than any other race of women. This is a turn-off for most non-black men. Studies have documented this. No other race can satisfy a black woman. Only a black man can.

    • absolute horse sh*t

    • It's interesting to see black girls showing an interest in other races of men at such an early age. That wasn't the case a few years ago. The world is definitely changing. Can't wait for the day when there is just one race of people.

    • So not true t all it depend on the women not the race that's like me say I love black me because all of them have big d***s.

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  • I would not mind dating a black girl. There is more to the girl than just color. Society may play a big role in some white males opinions on them though.

    • (: Excellent.

  • I think that beautiful women come in all colors, shapes and sizes, as I have no major race issues. I must admit though I had an African American woman pursuing me some time back when I was in the service as she often commented on my fat behind, which she always said was a compliment and that she would really like to be with me. I didn't have a problem with this and was always friendly with her. However when we were supposed to "hook up" as it were I didn't do anything, not because I didn't like her, but because at the time I was still a virgin and was rather worried that my "junk" wouldn't be big enough for her or that I wouldn't please her, so this was more a confidence issue on my part than a racial issue. I feel today though that were I single again and an African American woman were to pursue me again I would be more confident than before and I would be a little more assertive, not because my dimensions have changed from before, but I have a little more experience and believe it is more how I treat a woman than how big or small my parts are. I hope this makes sense and that it isn't offensive to anyone, I'm just being honest.

  • i don't think that's true,i have know problem asking a black girl out if I meet one that I find attractive, I only want to date black girls I'm just haven't been around many lately,i'm on 2 different interacial dateing sites,trust mei as least for me I don't have a problem with it,i've always found black girls to be cooler to hang out with and are better in bed,i will only date a black girl,i get turned on so much more,

  • The hair, they usually(not always, NOT STEREOTYPING) were there hair in a different way than other races.

  • I'm a white guy, and I have absolutely no problem with dating a girl from any ethnicity. My first love was black, actually.

    • Loll

    • Aww.:) lol

    • In other words: Ladies? Lol

  • There are girls that I find attractive like beyonce (well most of people assume her to be black) and the actress in Cradle to the Grave (Jet Li starer). The girl in Mission impossible 2 was not that bad. So I think black women are not that ...u know. A better care of yoursef will improve the things for you, I think.

    • Beyonce is black, and she doesn't deny it. that girl is very prideful.i guess light skin means you aren't a black american. when in fact that's very black american.

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What Girls Said 28

  • Black girls rule!

  • Society and fear

  • I go to a community college and I notice this a lot too...I think its just a social stigma. White men think that they have to act like the black men that they see on TV if they are going to date a black woman.I am a white female and I am dating a dominican/black mixed male. I never saw the color of his skin as being a problem, and I knew that my family would respect whoever I choose. I think that most white household families are not okay with the whole situation, so the men feel pressured not to bring a black woman home.

  • Probably lack of attraction... :/

  • LOL... Did any of you know that Ann Coulter was dating Jimmie "Jay Jay" Walker?All sorts of people get together for all sorts of reasons, evidently...I really wish that race was not an issue . As it stands, I am fed-up with the world's BS.

  • The same thing that stops any guy...fear of rejection.

  • I've never net a white dude that sisnt want a black chick..lol. My boyfriend is white and I've been with him for a year <33

  • what is up with all these desperate ass black girls on the internet pining away for white guys? stop it! I'm a black girl and your making us look bad. not all of us are white boy crazy and desperate ready for a caucasian savior to come take us away...you should have more pride in yourself because it sounds like you are desperate for a white guy... comments like the ones you have gotten makes me glad I don't like white boys. a lot of them are just not interested in black girls and most of us are not feeling them either this is america honey most people still believe in the stereotypes and apply them to all of us. why would you want to date someone like this? we are at the bottom of the social totem pole in many ppls eyes. you have people saying that we're big, aggressive and mean and loud lol its crazy. I've met girls like that of all races but we're the only ones that get generalized. most of these people probably only know like 5 black people personally so how can they generalize? just date a black man, or at least a hispanic or mixed guy

    • totally agree with u

    • ANOTHER SELLOUT! you think you're a white girl and think you're better than black people because you gotta white boyfriend. I wonder if that white guy will introduce you to his parents or marry you one day? yeah I doubt it sista. there are decent black guys out there but a sellout would rather date white trash than find a good black man..if you wanna date outside your race - fine, but do you realize how much of a uncle tom you look dissing your own ppl? I bet your white boyfriend doesn't diss white girls

    • Don't get mad when your 'perfect, loving' black guy starts beating you, I'm sure it's coming. Anyway, you have to understand that there aren't a lot of decent black guys. Maybe you live in a good area. Idk. But, seriously, get your head out of your ass. Not all slaves were treated like sh*t. >>; I'm proud to date a 'white' guy, and my family supports me. Now, the UGLY ghetto people at my school don't, but the decent people do. Not all whites are ignorant, either. Calm down. Love and Pickles, STM~

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  • i have a black friend who also questions this. she said she really likes this one white guy. in a group chat, he said that he would date any race or creed but when it came to her asking him out he said, I'm not into u. the next day I asked him why didn't you say yes? he said because she is black and she is too big I'm afraid of her. I figured its cus she's a tall strong girl(she played on a male football team in high school) a lot of white guys are afraid of big girls. guys want to protect someone then someone protecting them. as hard as it is to say this but if my friend was a lot smaller girl this guy would have went for her, I have noticed that a lot of black girls are tall or heavier then a white, Hispanic or any other race. I don't kno how much you way for your body type but a lot of guys like to hold someone and not be held

  • half these things the guys are saying are not true, I'm a black women and I'm very attrated to white guys but I'm not rude,loud,ignorent or any of that stuff it actually takes me a while to truly get close to a guy any race of guy,but I also lived in australia for most of my life but before any of you stereotype its a good country(and I'm not aboriginal..lol)and not a lot of white guys approach me .i realllly don't like the way some black guys are just so upfront with their comments it does kind of suprize me but seriously guys approach a black women sometimes you might be suprised by her response :)

  • My experience is they feel as though black females wouldn't give them the time of day so they don't bother.

  • My boyfriend is German and I'm Jamaican.. Nothing stopped him from chasin this tail hunnay ;)

    • What you said . my bofriendd is white and I'm black and that didn't stop him from chasing what he wanted .

  • well from what I found out from other white guys on here is that they don't kno how to approach black girls, because they dnt kno how we're gonna react - whether we'll insult them, be shockd or if we'll act completely normal. I was askin myself the same question cause I'm into white guys but never been approached by 1 - now I kno why =) dnt kno if thas helpd

  • I don't know really.

  • Well you like them. It is okay.

  • I'm not a white GUY, but as a white GIRL I can tell you that most black women seem... not to sound racist, but rather stand-offish. I'm very intimidated by them because they don't appear to ME to be as receptive or as welcoming as my "usual crowd". I have plenty of black friends, however, our friendships were only started because THEY approached ME. I realize this is really backward thinking and I'm probably just acting insecure, but black women look like can kick my butt with a remarkable amount of ease. Then again, I avoid the overly-confident "cheerleader" type white girls as well.

    • lol your answer reminds me of the movie Mean Girls. Remember that clique, the "Unfriendly Black Hotties"?

  • In general from experience black girls, have a lot of attitude and white guys hate that, they come off too rude. Plus it does'nt help that they generally don't give white guys a second look so they become intimidating to approach if you get my drift? So stereotypically white guys kind of just back off, Please take no offence to what I'm saying just stateing my view. But physically black girls are attractive. Hope it helps answer your question

  • I think fear and social stigmas is at the top of the list. It is much more excepted if your families and friends are OK with your dating choices. The city you live in also has a big play in it. I live in Seattle and international dating is common here. I have been dating black men for 20 years and hence my son (34) loves black women and has even been in a long term relationship with a girl that I love and feel is a very good person. So don't blame the men you just haven't found the right one. Good Luck!Trudywww.DumbDates.com

  • some guys are jerks

  • Out of all honesty, I'm not trying to be offensive or anything and I'm not saying this is true in every case But my dad is white and 52 years old and he grew up around a lot of racial crap. And he wouldn't not allow me to date a black guy but he more than likely would not approve of it and also I would never hear the end of it. I think a lot of it is stereotypical stuff and I personally would want to go out with a few cute black guys but I don't think my family or friends would ever approve of it and I don't want to dissapoint them. Even though blacks and whites all equal now there is still A lot of racism, and there always will be.

  • Thats funny because I'm from LA and see white guys dating black girls all the time!I guess its just where you live?

  • Well I'm mixed so I just called my friend John and he said that he is scared of african amercian ladies because they argue alot... But not all

  • Okay this goes back to the media and what we've been brainwashed to accept as beautiful and sexy. We've been bombarded with images all our lives, movies, commercials, shows, we are continuely being shown these images of what is "supposed" to look good. To be considered pretty or beautiful you have to either have eurocentric features or pretty close to it. Long hair, lighter skin, either blonde or brown, light colored eyes, and being thin is the "standard" beauty. We've been shown this all our lives till the point the majority believes this, notice how someone non black or black will be quicker to say beyonce or rihanna is hot rather than another other black person in the media. Why? because we've been shown their images over and over again and told over and over again they are sexy, they are beautiful ( not to say riihanna and beyonce aren't beautiful because that would be a lie) . It's more "acceptable" to date someone that would either look like beyonce or rihanna because they have "eurocentric" features. If you don't fit the bill most likely many won't be attracted as crazy and stupid as it sounds. Media has a hold on us, like someone's comment below, babies aren't taught to be racist, children aren't racist, it's taught. Honestly I think some white guys won't approach because of stereotypes, they believe black girls are loud, obnoxious, always having an attitude, and then they don't fit the media standard, and will probably not approach. I'm not saying all white guys are like that, but I'm sure there are a lot who may feel this way. Stereotypes gets no one any where, I'm a quiet, reserved black girl, who reads everyday, who is in no way "ghetto", and shy. Come on people this is 2010, we need to really get off these stereo types and actually get to know people.

    • as a guy let me say that recent studies show that most people date exclisively within their own race.the interracial relationships on TV and in movies and among hollywood celebrities does NOT reflect the norm'..besides,preference is preference and shouldn't be blown into some huge issue.

    • Theres a reason they say that light skin blonde hair and light eyes are sexier...cuz they are, I love that look its sooo sexy

  • Well I'm a black girl and I've had white guys like me and hit on me. Or some just check me out and don't say nothing. To answer your question, I think it's because they're afraid of rejection.

    • Well guys are afraid of rejection from any cute girls. I do admit yall have sum niiiice asses haha

  • i hate these questions, I really do. it doesn't always have to be about race.

    • I hate these questions too bcz race has nothing to do with it! I suppose at least with me it was how I was raised; its really not even a socioenvironmental conditioning type of thing anymore its basically an overall personal choice that has no right or wrong answer to...in the end though its about chemistry and attraction...even though as they say once you go black you never go back -Im intrigued by all colors and creeds!!!

    • Sometimes it's not about race, but just preference.You can substitute out black and white for fat and thin, or brunette and redheads.The woman who posed the question wanted some clarity... she wanted to see if it was a racial reason or a preferential reason. I think the good thing is that there hasn't been an anonymous moron spewing racist/bible thumping "rationale" as to why people from different races/cultures shouldn't be together.

  • Social stigmas. You've watched TV lately right? It's a common fact that the general portrayal of the average black person in the media is not a good thing. Culture differences could be one. A black girl that is "whitewashed" wears A&F and acts white would be more likely to get a white boyfriend than a around the way girl from the hood. People usually date those they have things in common with. If they look at you and you fit a different image than they do, they are less likely to get to know youIt may be 2010 but racism is still here. Jim Crow racism is pretty much dead but there are those who still have stereotypical views and think of themselves as superior. If not that particular guy, then maybe his family and peers would frown on it Some are not attracted to black girls. Usually in most cases, most people are attracted to others with features similar to their own.Also some can fear the reactions of HER peers...maybe like a Romeo and Juliet thing. I remember I was talking to this white guy a couple years ago, we were pretty good friends and had a lot in common...we almost went out but one of my friends had a problem with it. He saw us talking and actually came up to him and picked a fight with him.. and a lot of other stuff happened after that so that pretty much ruined things..(goes back to the race thing, he is a black guy but doesn't like to see white boys date black girls)

    • When you group an entire race of people because of ready-made stereotypes, that is racist. you don't have to wear white sheets and burn crosses to be a racist

    • Stereo typingis not racism. its recognizing that certain people are related to certain things more than others....i know you might have to read it slow because I just read it and got mixed up.

    • "You've watched TV lately right? It's a common fact that the general portrayal of the average black person in the media is not a good thing." - SMART GIRL! Its the entrenched psychological brainwashing that begins when kids are just babies. I mean why would most kids (black or white) choose a white doll as being "nicer" or "prettier", "good" etc? Babies clearly are not racist but they do get bombarded with negative images of blacks in the media. This is obvious. What is not is the impact from it

  • i think that a lot of white males might find the stereotypical (loud, in your face, whatever else falls under there) black female intimidating and too much of a hassle, so they just stay away from all in general. obviously the stereotype doesn't apply to all, but I've seen this sort of question several times on this site now and a lot of answers always come back to the stereotype, with guys saying, "if she doesn't fit the stereotype and is nice and calm and etcetc, I would like to get to know her better"

  • I think physical attraction, which is the first attraction a guy has for you, is something that is just inside of you from an early age and it isn't thought out or logical. I personally like certain odd little physical qualities because I connect them to guys who once had a crush on me. For instance, my last boyfriend shaved his head and though I have no interest in being with him, I notice that when I see a shaved head it triggers this sense of attraction, though I can later talk to the guy and feel nothing.

    • True, but luckily now there is such a range of what we are attracted to as individuals. The media may portray a one-size-fits-all look that guys like but is not the case in reality.

    • Physical attraction can be influenced by environment and not just genetics. Ideal bodies have changed and differ by culture. During times of desolation in early Europe heavier women we more attractive. Then look at the strange neck things in a few African tribes, bound feet in China. Ridiculously oversized fake boobs in America.

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