Guy asks if I have a "hot date", what is his deal?

[Anonymous]

He ignored my reply on Friday night. Didn't say a word on football Saturday, so I figured he was busy doing "man stuff". Then, Sunday, he text me the earliest he ever text me that morning. Our short convo went like this:

Him: Hi

Me: Hey

Him: What are you doing?

Me: Getting ready. You?

Him: For what?

Me: I've for somewhere to go.

Him: Hot date? Lol.

Me: Maybe.

Him: Lol.

He texts me on a Sunday morning, after not speaking to me all Saturday long, or making a date with me, which he HAS YET TO DO, to inquire exactly what I was doing and to ask if I had a hot date?

To me, I don't believe my "maybe" reply was unwarranted, or rude. He hasn't asked me on a date and then thinks he's entitled to know what I'm doing when I hardly ever know what he's up to and he didn't even respond to my friendly inquisition as to what he was doing? NO!

What is his deal? Am I just a play thing? He acted taken aback when I asked why he texted me the other night... I just don't understand what his deal is. I've made it clear that I would love to go to the lake with him AFTER meeting him in person a few times. Not before. Inviting me to the lake seems to be all he does.

[dazed15]

it's easy to hide bodies at the lake ;) . he's trying to make a date with you, you want to meet first. understandable. replying maybe as you did, is pretty normal for a girl who is unsure of the guy she's talking to. even when a girl knows aguy or vice versa, maybe keeps them guessing. it's a game. doe she know what you look like? if not, take what you know of him, go to the lake and scope him out. that way you can tell him that you've been to the lake, and now it's time to meet or you are walking. something along those lines anyway. by going to the lake, you can see the spots to avoid, etc. for when you do go.

[Asker]

Yes, he's a stranger! Only desperate/skanky women go to a stranger's house. My thing is: why should you know, when you won't even ask me on a proper date? If you won't, some guy will! I've told him I'd like to meet him, but he will not step up and PLAN - he knows I'm busy - a date! He hasn't text me since saying "Lol" Sunday. I don't look for him too. I know he's talking to other women...I'll be disappointed if he flees because he might have competition. Lesson: Boys, don't hold double standards

[dazed15]

ok I get most of that, but from 'i'll be ... double standards', I'm not clear on

[Asker]

I'll be disappointed if he never talks to me again just because I MIGHT have had a date, considering I know he talks to other women. That is a double standard. He can talk to other women, but disappears if I say I might have plans with another guy WHEN HE ASKS. I'm just sad. I really liked him and wish he would've asked me out.

[dazed15]

ok, used to you dated a couple people at a time. just dated. when it got serious with one, you went steady, bf/gf. you say he talks to other girls, but you teased him that you might have a date with someone else. that seems like a pretty big difference. it's one thing to not want to seem desperate, a whole other to mislead. do you know that in his talks to other girls that he's asking for/getting dates? if not, then where's the double standard? don't girls get dates easier than guys?

[Asker]

From what I know, if another girl would come to his lake house, YES. I don't think it's rude, considering he won't take me on a proper date. He hasn't asked. It's none of his business what I do. I don't know what he does. Guys get dates easier because they do the asking. Women, who want men to lead like me, have to send signals and wait!

[dazed15]

ok, if he's 'letting the flies come to the honey', he's a player. or he's just getting what he can on his terms. I see you still steaming over his wantingto know what you do when he won't commit.

[Anonymous]

i think he was trying to get with you but was scared about it so he made sure you werent busy so he could ask you properly

[Asker]

I don't know why he would finally, after a month of stalling, finally step it up! But, you may be right. That might be why he text me earlier than he ever has. That makes me sad. :( I don't know. He is so frustrating. I'm afraid he won't text back, even though I know he talks to other girls.