How do I get my girlfriend to wear high heels and skirts more often?

[Anonymous]

I've been dating this girl for a little over a year now and I want her to start dressing a little more sexy. When we go out it's no problem, she's usually pretty good about it. But she wears a lot of pants and flat shoes to work, and it bothers me because almost every other girl is wearing high heel shoes and skirts (we work in the same office). I'll be honest, it's hard not to look because those other girls seem more attractive sometimes. I don't mean to compare her against everyone else, but it's just natural and I want her to look her best always. I talked to her about it a couple of times, but she says it's just too uncomfortable to deal with. It seems as though other women have no problem with it. they love high heels and skirts.

Is there anyone women with good advice or guys that have run into this situation before?

[wildd]

Well, its obvious that she doesn't feel comfy in heels or skirts while she's working. I think its kind of a downer that you can't accept her look because if she loved heels and skirts - she'd wear em hands down. But, if you really want to change her look, then compliment on her legs and state that she'll look great in skirts with heels - say something that will give her major clues that you want to see her in that outfit. Also, take her out shopping and offer to buy her skirts. Or you can just - one day - go buy her a skirt/heel outfit and give it to her as a present. I guess she'll agree on wearing it considering you bought it for her, and once she does, take her out for a dinner or something in that outfit.

If she still says "no" to heel and skirt look - then I guess you''l just have to deal with it and accept her style.

[eyeloveyou2]

I'm curious to know why you would want her to change. If she's your girlfriend, you should think she is beautiful just the way she is.maybe she is lacking confidence. For instance, I never wear shorts or dresses in public because my confidence has been flushed down the toilet. Always remind her how beautiful she looks, even if she isn't wearing what you desire her to. Maybe once you begin showing her that you love her even if she doesn't dress 'sexy,' her confidence will boost and she will begin wearing more appealing clothing.

[Asker]

Again, it's not that I want her to change. I just want her to accentuate more of what she already has going on for her. It's almost the same as taking something beautiful, then covering it up just because you can. Why would you do that?

Anyhow, I do think she is beautiful, and she thinks she's cute, but not supermodel gorgeous or anything. Generally, she's pretty modest about that type of stuff, as I think most girls are. Confidence is definitely not an issue here, I can assure you.

[lola23]

Ok here is what I would suggest.Buy her a cute outfit. Skirt, high heels, top, and accessories. The whole thing! She will wear it because you bought it most likely. You could even say "hey you should wear this to work tomorrow!" Then when she wears it tell her "hey that looks really sexy on you. I can't keep my eyes off of you! You look good in that kinda outfit you should wear that more often!' Most likely she will start keepin her eye out for more outfits of the same cause she wants those compliments!

[Asker]

Thanks Lola, you did a good job with this. I was thinking along these lines too. The easier you make it, the better of a chance to get it to happen more often. A lot of girls have mentioned that the more interest you take in her, the less pressure on her to impress and worry about all the little things. Not to mention, it's a good set of gift ideas too. That sounds like the best in my book, thanks!

[AJtogo]

Sounds like you want some eye-candy on your arm. You're comparing her to others and she doesn't measure up. You say that you want her to look her best but it's really for you and not for her. If you're happy with her and she's comfortable in what she wears then leave her alone.

Besides, she probably looks better naked anyway. Enjoy that!

[Asker]

Well, to be honest, who doesn't want their woman to look their best? It's not that she doesn't measure up to others, it's just that she tends to downplay her looks by kind of "dressing down" in that respect. Additionally, I could easily just tell myself to leave her alone, but that's why I asked the question. Nothing personal, but I really didn't need you to tell me what I already knew. And yeah, of course she looks good naked, that's a given.

[Toshytosee]

A girl doesn't have to wear a skirt and high heels to make themselves look sexy. If they can pull it off then it's great if she still looks attractive with just normal jeans and shoes. I'm guessing she goes to work like that so she can be comfortable. You want to be comfortable when you are doing your job right?

[Evolution86]

Honestly, skirts and high heels are so uncomfortable. Just because some women would prefer to wear skirts and heels to work, doesn't mean every woman does. Personally, I hate skirts and the only heels I wear, are my biker boots. And, I think you're being a little superficial with wanting her to conform to the other women in the office. Pants and flats are much more comfortable, so if that's what she'd prefer to wear to work, leave her alone about it. You said she wears skirts and heels when you go out, that should make you happy. Why complain that she'd rather be comfortable for 8 hours while she works, instead of her complaining when she gets home because her feet hurt?

[Asker]

I'm sure you're right, pants and flats are much more comfortable. But again, we're not comparing comfortability here, we're talking about general attractive things that women do for themselves, guys, and a bunch of other reasons. If she complained that her feet hurt, I would be all over giving her a good foot massage, back rub, anything.

I don't think it's a lot to ask for a woman to accentuate all that she has. It's great when you know your babe feels extra confident and sexy that day.

[Evolution86]

Well then tell her that. It's my opinion. I hate skirts and heels, so if my guy asked me to wear them more often, he'd get an ear full. But, that's me. If that's the way you want your girlfriend to dress all the time, then that's your business.

[Belleza]

Yes high heels are attractive but try walking in them yourself! Yes sometimes any kinda girl would get a click in her brain to wear heels but that would be when she actually wants it! You can't talk to her about this but her girl friends can - ask one of her friends to talk to her about it!

[miaaajx]

She's told you she's uncomfortable with it so you should back off. You do realise how harmful high heels are right? Numb toes, bunions, painful feet, damage to knees and spine. If you care more about her appearance than her health then you really do have an issue.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like your girlfriend has more self-respect than the other women she works with. You should be GLAD that you've got a girl who is secure enough with herself that she knows it's unnecessary to wear overly sexy clothes in the workplace because her sexiness is not what work is about and it's definitely not all she has got going for her.

It boggles my mind that women are expected to wear uncomfortable clothes and shoes that hurt to please men, yet the most uncomfortable thing a man will ever wear for a woman is a tie. The thing that really pisses me off is that men like you think it's a woman's obligation that she make herself uncomfortable just to please you visually for everyday, mundane crap. Grow up. I'd like to see you wear heels to work every day.

[blitz]

Just say something like "girls wearing skirts and heels are soo hot" or "they're so damn hot on a girl".and she'll get the point that you're into them. we pick up hints pretty well. if she doesn't do as you like then she's not going to. if it's that uncomfortable for her then don't bother?

or maybe just tell her to do it in the bedroom?

[SuperFlanker]

I'll definitely have to agree on that tactic... you can't go wrong with that!

[Asker]

I would do what you said, but maybe in a little less comparative way. I don't want her to feel like she should do it because all other girls do it. Again, I'm being candid here with you on here, but generally, I would look to focus on her, saying how hot she looks dressed that way and how I just can't take my eyes off of her. Good thoughts though, thanks!

[jaclynjune16]

most women will not change anything about themselves to be with a guy. that's a little immature. you should just accept her for the way she is.

[AJtogo]

You're out to lunch girl:) Look at all the answers and questions from girls on this site who want to change things about themselves to please their guy or to attract a guy. Should they do it? Probably not , but they do.

[jaclynjune16]

Hey, its just my opinion. changing something about yourself to please others is just a big waste of time.

[ALWAYSclassy]

It's not as if he asked her to change a major personality component, he just wants to see her in a skirt and heels. Not such a bad request, besides guys will change little stuff for us if we ask them to!

[Asker]

I'm not really asking for a change, in my opinion. All I'm asking for her to do is a little more of what she already does, but only on occasion. I would like her to make it a little more of the norm for her. Thanks to you ALWAYSclassy, I didn't think I was being unreasonable.

What I would like to know is why you think it's a big waste of time to consider pleasing a guy that you were in love with? Wouldn't that be the ultimate opportunity to be all that you can for the one you love?

[ALWAYSclassy]

Suggest that she would look really sexy in skirts & heels. She might not feel comfortable in them. I don't think it's a bad request.