Why do guys ALWAYS Say, you are either pretty, sexy, beautiful for a black girl?

[Anonymous]

Are black women known to be ugly? Hell i dont understand that,
Naomi campbell, Tika Sumpter, Beyonce,
janellle monae, i could go on. But y'all get it.
people can say they ain't racist how many time they want. But there is a little bit of it all in each human being in this world, so make me understand oppose to what are black girls to pretty for being black?
Excuse my writing but i don give a fudge about it since im really pissed!

Updates

+1 y

*Not all guys do this,
but most I've come across, and mainly the same dudes that are in the same friendship circle as me.

[JuicyBrain]

Many reasons could explain that. We have evolved to refrain from what is new/different because what you don't know can kill you. The same way you would react if there was someone in your living room when you got home. You would immediately identify them as a threat. This is the kind of primal reaction you don't get rid of easily. You can open your mind all you want, it's still in your subconscious. I think that's why you can say things like :"She's very beautiful for a black girl" without realizing that it sounds kind of racist. I think the guy actually really means it when he says you're beautiful. There is also the fact that most people will be with people of their own ethnicity. So what they are really saying is :"For someone who is not in the group of people I normally prefer, you look very attractive and it's making me rethink what I am attracted by". I think that if we are to all get together and love each other and have wonderful brown babies, we should be able to accept that there will always be some friction and learn to live with it. Not all racism is done consciously and while we should always try to make it better, it will never be perfect. This is equally applicable from both sides by the way. The same thing can be seen from black people too...

[tenchu11]

I think most guys that aren't black label black girls to be "hood rats" like the woman they see on cops. It's a stereo type that although they don't mean it... it's very racist. Like some one saying to me "your actually pretty smart for a Mexican"

[Asker]

Yes exactly and then the act all nice as if the made my day by telling me that bullshit.

[Ozanne]

They don't "all" say it. However there are many other comments some people make such as, "She's attractive for an older chick," or, "She's pretty for a big girl," or, "She's quite intelligent for an attractive girl," and on and on it goes. The people who say the stuff like that just go on auto pilot for what they are revealing is not their type. Some guys aren't attracted to black girls, some aren't attracted to girls with red hair and freckles. So what can you do, you know? People say stupid things and I think they generalize mostly based on what they think is attractive for them. I don't think they mean to be racist, though it's a prejudiced thing to say, more so than it's sort of a dumb comment. I have heard, "You're pretty even though you're overweight," or words to that affect. If we're supposed to get past body-image shaming, then I would by rights question this same thing. People just don't know when to stop saying stupid shit I guess.

[Asker]

Thanks for a bit clearance, I know what you mean.

[KAZ-2Y5]

It's not a compliment this is the same thing with saying you are smart for a girl, pretty for a skinny girl etc.
you are just pretty not pretty for a black girl. I think they have never really seen a black girl who is pretty and you are the exception personally I think they have internalized racism issues I don't get how some people say black girls are undesirable. I don't know if you are on tumblr but tumblr has these days called black out days where black people post selfies and everyone reblogs them to boost their confidence going through my news feed on tumblr made me want to cry they all looked like goddesses

[SakuraChii]

I understand why it's an insult, I recently seen this picture on tumblr as well. I can't find it though. I don't know if your new or not, but we constantly talk about this. The answer is obvious, I even made a question "why do a lot of men see black women as undesirable"(this buzzfeed video put black women as least desirable based on voting/messaging) like a year ago. Guys like girls it's as simple as that, unfortunately some guys think that all black women are ugly from what they see or the media so when they see a "attractive" one. They use that "compliment" when in reality their just insulting our race.

[Asker]

Exactly, it's supposed to be a compliment while its just ignorance.

[Zamac]

Lack of sensibility and/or veiled racism.

Have you ever heard it from a black guy? (hardly, unless he was mocking / teasing you). Those who are different and are not used to see people from other races (if "race" exists) in their common day-by-day lives or are not used to blend with other races may come with this without offensive intentions.

It is like, for example, going to some countryside area in an Asian country and having your newly made friends tell you "you're pretty for a westerner". You're from Kenya, do you think it is possible for some Maasai tribesman to say (or think) to a white woman something like: "you are white but you're pretty"?

It is not necessarily racism (but could be).

[AleDeEurope]

Those guys that say that do it cause they don't generally feel attracted to black women, it's not their preference (and you gotta respect that) so when they find one that they're attracted too, they will say it like that.
I personally would never say it that way cause it may be misunderstood (like what's happening now), and I know that every race has its good and its bad.
And just because someone doesn't consider black women attractive doesn't mean they're racists, that's a misconception you gotta get rid off.

[Krillanr]

The whole race thing is really awkward for people, there are so many things that screw with your head about it, what to say, what not to say. I've been told to say black, then a black person chewed me out, then I've been told to say African American, and again that pissed some off.

It's the tension about it, if I think "Ya she's pretty, but I'm not attracted to black girls." I'm not racist, my brain just doesn't feel much towards darker complexion. That can come out of the mouth as "You are pretty for a race I'm not attracted to."

I wouldn't openly say it myself just because I know someone will get pissed from it, but I get that kind of logic.

[Jamaila]

That doesn't make any sense. ur pretty for a race? that is kind of harsh to say. your pretty but im not attracted to you sound better. tho how you say it is pretty racist but i guess your not. your just not attracted to darker skin complections but you just gotta watch how you say it like damn it kind of hurts people. not me cuz i dont give a shit :p. but some girls do

[Anonymous]

What's worse. "You're pretty for a black girl" or "You're pretty for a dark skinned girl" I'm a black girl I've never received a compliment like "you're pretty for a black girl " I always get "you're pretty are you sure you're all black" now that's the one that's annoying.

[SakuraChii]

Yes and asking if someone is mixed because they have real long hair is annoying as well, those people are basically saying that black women can't obtain universal attractive things such as facial features, personality or long hair.

[Opinion Owner]

Yes , very true. People like to play in my hair it's only mid back length but I think most people are checking to see if it's real. It's not just white people that do it , it's black people too. Most people think that if you're black you have to look a certain way.

[lanternhill]

Some people are racist - and beauty standards in this country have been based on whiteness for a long time due to class and power reasons (or I assume that's why). I think many many black people are beautiful/handsome, same as any other race. Some people just compare them to white people because of the position that the latter occupy in society/media/culture. It's stupid and I'm sorry you experience that.

[vishna]

Those guys are probably feeling like they shouldn't find black women attractive. And seeing you, you are making them see things differently. But they still have conflicting feelings about black women/people, so they add on the stupid comment.

I cheered in highschool, and I kid you not, a few of the guys were talking and said "Damn, the cheerleaders are hot, I would date all of them, the white ones at least" Lol, and racism is over... oh brother.

[desidoll]

When someone says that, it means they don't find Black women to be attractive, but they find you to be attractive, which is very offensive. It's a back handed compliment. This happens to Indian women as well. Black and Indian women are known to be the least attractive among all races.

[MysteriousChick93]

Known to who though. Where's the proof or research or do you mean the statistics from this site?

[desidoll]

@MysteriousChick93:You should google it online and if it still doesn't give you enough proof, you can try to make a survey on every men from different racial backgrounds. I am an Indian woman so I know. I get this type of comment every time, everywhere and almost everyday.

[MysteriousChick93]

That still doesn't prove its every guy across the world?

[desidoll]

I didn't say it applies to the guys ALL over the world but MOST guys feel this way. Well I totally disagree with this generalization but I guess I can't change it though. Just thanks to some guys who don't fall into this stereotype.

[Kenzy-Yinn]

Always... you're wrong at the 'always'
not all guys do that. There's a black girl in my class, and she's good looking...
And if I compliment her it's just "you look really nice today! Like that shirt is really good on you" but that's it.
She is usually good looking, just sometimes she can be beauty itself

[Asker]

I really didn't meant all guys, but I meant some guys at least some I've met say this like their doing me a favor and it's always the same guys.

[Nuqood]

They aren't typically attracted to black women, so to them you are beautiful for someone they don't typically find attractive. It's one person's opinion, and it's not like they're saying that 'it's a known fact that black people are universally ugly'.

[Nuqood]

For the record, I find all ethnic groups gorgeous, especially Arab women and Black women, so the opinion of 'attractive for a/an' doesn't apply to me (It's easy to understand with a little bit of thought, though).

[mr90skid]

They either don't find black women attractive or believe for whatever reason that y'all aren't supposed to be good looking enough for them to find ya attractive.
Just shrug it off and go your way with ya head high :)

[Stacyzee]

It's a back handed compliment.
Some people don't mean anything by it, and say it as a harmless statement (without much thinking)

What someone is implying is that they usually don't find black girls attractive, but you are.

[Justacatlady]

Its not just black girls. I get "your so pretty for a big girl" Some people are just have no manners. If it bothers you that much, the next time someone says it, ask what they mean.

[Asker]

Yes it so dumb, as if we're all supposed to all look alike and be a certain way..

[bubble_tea]

"ask what they mean" oh my.. I'm looking forward to their explanations! lol

[Izzex3]

Lmao, yeah.
I get that a lot.
Either that or people try to tell me that I'm not black and MUST be mixed with something.
Apparently it's impossible to be pretty and black. I HAVE to be mixed with something else.

[Nuqood]

You look pretty white to me ;)

[Anonymous]

They are using the standard of western beauty where if a black girl has the features of a Caucasian female (smaller lips, thin nose, smaller figure/butt, etc.)

It is racist to say "for a black girl" at the end of any sentence and those who say it are ignorant.

[9mfeo]

Oh god, that's so insulting! People ACTUALLY say things like that to people?

[Asker]

Yes they do, with a big stupid smile on their face as if the did you a favor. Just dumb guys not all guys though.

[9mfeo]

Ugh. I hate people. Especially dumb ones with internalized racism issues.

[Goldie757]

I cringe when people say that, some people have no manners. Its just as bad as when people say "you don't talk black".

[aamy811]

I don't know I guess it's because they don't actually think I'm pretty, they just don't think I'm hideous and it's some how astounding to then.

[lanternhill]

Accidental up vote sorry

[BertMacklinFBI]

I don't get it, are you complaining why black girls get compliments?

[Asker]

Just be gone please... It's not the compliment.
More so how It's said. As if someone would say " wow your reading skills are good for being a redneck" or something like that, it's some stereotypical bullshit.

[BertMacklinFBI]

okay so what is stereotypical about someone saying "hey you're pretty" to a black person.

[SakuraChii]

I don't think you read the title. She said FOR A BLACK GIRL. Meaning that whoever is being "complimented" is an exception.

[Asker]

The person is saying " your a pretty... For a black girl " as in you are too pretty for being a black girl meaning black women are ugly. I just want to know why black women are visioned as ugly.

[BertMacklinFBI]

@SakuraChii now I get it. thank you for the clarification, reading it normally it seemed like she just meant for as in towards black girls.

[BertMacklinFBI]

@asker to put it quite blunt, studies have shown that black people are on the lesser side of the attraction list, I believe white are top, then it boils down to darker skinned people, like Spanish > Asian > black. obviously all black people aren't ugly, Tyra Banks and Leona Lewis are 2 examples, its just all of that gen. pop. fuckery that society leads with that turns some people to form this way of thought.

[vishna]

@BertMacklin since beauty is subjective (unless we're talking about things like symmetry) so, perhaps people have simply been told 'This trait is good, and this trait is bad' And so as it would happen, people have been told the general black/African traits are bad.

[BertMacklinFBI]

@vishna oh yeah its definitely all subjective, im just referring to the statistics that people post on here whenever the racial topic arises.

[Anonymous]

What kind of question is this , Black women are the most beautiful women followed by Island women. Not attacking you personally , But I'm beginning to think. Social media want people to believe this about black women , When they know the truth.

[LiveFreeorDieHard]

People are assholes, so get over that right now. I think most guys consider white girls to be the most desirable. So everyone aims for them. What do you think is the most desirable race of men?