Why do girls never give shy guys a chance?

[linemanboy]

the title says it all but I just wanna know y'all know the shy guys are usually better-more loving, loyal,respectful- yet y'all never give them a chance. why?

Updates

+1 y

im not saying all shy guys are better, and not saying all other guys are bad, but usually the people I know even when they know they like them they won't give them a chance, and I catch it all... short, shy, nice guy , what could be worse?

Updates

+1 y

and I do keep convorsation and not really shy about tlkin and stuff but just have a hard time makin moves

[Anonymous]

1) I have given shy guys a chance, and I did not like it. I have a more outgoing personality, and I am happier with men that are the same.

2) Saying that shy guys are more loving, loyal, and respectful is a generalization. Maybe YOU are those things, but outgoing guys can be just as loving, loyal and respectful. There are good and bad parts to everyone.

3) Shyness is an insecurity. People are shy because they undervalue themselves and fear criticism more than the normal person. So I would be more pressed to argue that a shy person is only loving, loyal, and respectful out of fear and insecurity. Being the "overly nice guy" in the hopes of keeping a woman. An outgoing, confident guy can be just as loving, loyal, and respectful, but not out of fear of losing a woman.

You are generalizing because you want women to pass up other guys and give you a chance. Basically what you're saying is, you want women to change so that YOU don't have to. You're more likely to be successful by becoming more confident than you are trying to get women to change. Women won't start dating guys they're not attracted to. No one is designed to do that.

[Opinion Owner]

Not making moves is your biggest problem. Guys that refuse to approach women will have trouble with relationships their whole lives (unless you're very rich & famous).

[linemanboy]

i approach them taik to them, I just have trouble takin it farther

[GracefulAscension]

Dominance is not a feminine trait. Therefore, girls rarely approach guys.

Shy guys sadly do not have assertive masculinity. Most girls will not approach such guys

If your shy girl who is heterosexual, there is still some chance you will have a boyfriend. Due to the lack of a dominant trait in femininity, there is little chance the shy guy will succeed. Even if the shy guy manages to approach a girl, he will still need to lead the entire interaction.

Women will deny this occurs. I see it all the time. This is the reason women are so easily seduced by male pickup artists. Every technique used by the pickup artists stimulates almost all their feminine traits. They act in the exact opposite way to a shy guy.

Some women may approach. Usually that is very rare. These women are subverting gender norms. Most women simply conform to gender norms as do many men.

[ashmin]

Your problem might not be that you're shy, but rather that you make presumptuous generalizations. Shy guys aren't "usually" those positive traits you mentioned. There are some shy guys that do as well as some non-shy guys that do. Your negative thinking might give off bad energy for starters. I am a shy woman and here is why I personally don't give shy guys a chance... nothing happens. Simple as that. I can't say anything bad about shy, quiet people because I am one. But I like men who take charge and make decisions and that usually doesn't happen with shy guys. My shyness keeps me from being outgoing in social situations, so I assume it's the same with shy men and why they don't make the first move. There isn't anything wrong with it, I just prefer an outgoing man who takes charge and goes for what he wants. Maybe you need the opposite? An extroverted woman? And please stop assuming that shy men are better. If they were, you wouldn't be on here trying to figure out why women won't give you a chance. :)

[Anonymous]

we don't know y'all like us. show some interest because a lot of the times, shy guys have been interested in me and I literally had NO idea. how can you tell when a shy guy likes you vs. him just being shy? and how do we know you feel differently for us compared to how you feel towards girls you're not interested in? if you're shy you're probably not interacting much and giving many signals in the first place. many times girls may not even notice you like them. you need to do your part if you want women to notice you

[amrdia]

girls are like fish attracted to anything shiny

on the other hand girls like to be provoked

like guys to show they want them

just like these animal planet show and how male gets a female

[Anonymous]

Girls do give shy guys a chance, if that shy guy makes a move. Shy guys just don't usually approach. They sit twiddling their thumbs wondering why girls aren't coming on to them. So there is no chance to be given. If instead, what you're asking is why women don't approach and pursue shy guys? That's because women rarely approach and pursue anyone. There are enough guys out there willing to be the man and approach us.

So because of this, IF we decide to approach a guy (which is already rare) we aren't going to take our chances on a shy guy who will probably make it hard on us, forcing us to make all the conversation, make the moves, and take control. We'll take our chances approaching an outgoing guy who will make it easy.

[Opinion Owner]

Just because someone likes you doesn't mean you're attracted. Girls in general aren't very attracted to shy guys. They seem insecure and unable to be a man.

[yagurlnira768]

Perfect answer.

[virgin_guy]

Truly shy guys don't make a move at all, they wait for the woman to make a move. That is the very definition of shy. Your answer is a cheap ass copout.

[Opinion Owner]

Which is why shy guys suffer, they refuse to do what nature defines as being the man, pursuing the female.

[mb31213]

I think a lot of girls either just notice the more out there guys or want somebody who gives them even mor attention =P don't be upset about it, find a girl who you like and just go for it. Maybe try and break out of your shell a little while still being yourself. I'm a shy girl so j know where you're comin from but just wait. You'll find someone who absolutely adores you no matter :)

[cuteLiLbunny]

well at the moment I'm trying to start dating one but since he's usually really shy around me its alittle hard. for one he never tries to be the one to initiate anything. I'm the one who asked him out, starts conversations, invites him to things. the problem with shy guys is its hard to tell if they like you or are even still interested.

[Shydude91]

You asked him out? Damn, you are a Goddess :) he is lucky.

[Lifesbeautiful]

It all depends on who he is shy around. If he is just shy around the girls then that is cute and I wouldn't mind at all but if he is shy around everyone then that could mean that he has a lot of insecurities which insecurities cause problems in relationships.

So if it is the 1st one then I would give it a try. :) Just as long as he becomes himself around me as time goes by. I would definitely prefer a guy who is shy and possesses those qualities than an outgoing guy that lacks those. :)

[Anonymous]

there are also shy girls out there, too, y'know? I mean, I consider myself pretty shy. sometimes even girls don't notice or are afraid to take a chance with ANY guy. personally, I know lots of girls who go for the more shy and quiet kind of guy. maybe you just haven't encountered one who thinks like that yet?

[xxxmegan]

It's hard to know if a guy is interested if he's too shy, so we don't want to waste our time. Think about like this, a girl goes for a guy and he acts all quiet and distant. Is he shy or is he not interested?

[Hazel-Nutty]

I don't go for shy guys cause I myself am quiet outgoing and bouncy and I feel like they would bore me and in the bedroom I love a guy to boss me about and dominate me and shy guys generally GENERALLY don't tend to be the dominating type

[XRabbitHeartX]

Because shy guys can sometimes look much more "reserved" and then you don't know whether they like you or not or what they are thinking. It can be intimidating when you have to keep the convo and the shy person just stands there.

[Anonymous]

isn't it obvious? because shy guys never approach girls

[virgin_guy]

Why should they have to?

[ashmin]

@virgin guy. your question is the exact reason why you get none!!

[Opinion Owner]

agree with ashmin

[icanbme]

we have no idea you like us.

[Anonymous]

Some dance to remember, some dance to forget.