But won't admit it for some reason? I have to say I hate arguing, I will defend my point for a few seconds but I won't start arguing over it and let it go. However there's one girl, stubborn, who is always arguing with me and I just eat it up. She is so smart that she makes an argument something I look forward to. Its not a real argument per se, we just bicker a lot like an old married couple (people mention this to us a lot) and while we have our pleasant conversations, there's just something about that bickering that makes it stand out and we have learned a lot about each other that way. I get along with most people, girls like talking to me and we keep it light and fun but her, she makes it impossible even though she is such a friendly girl and I never see her arguing with anybody. Sometimes we get mad at each other and stop talking and I have to say I miss disagreeing with her and bickering, its like our form of communication and kind of our indirect flirting technique, it kinds of says that we both admire each others' brains and the only way to truly enjoy them is to make them work at 100% every time, is this weird?
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+1 y
I mean, its not really full on fighting/arguing. Sometimes we nitpick on little things or statement and we verbalize it and we go on and on. Its hard ti explain, we sound serious but deep down we are just giving each other crap, that's why when people see us they laugh instead of feeling uncomfortable. I care about her opinion, I guess that why when she calls me a "name" I take it differently than if somebody else did it and she seems to care a lot about what I do or say because she nags a lot :P
Would you say it's true that when a guy and a girl argue a lot is because they like each other?
A really good friend of mine and I would have completely normal conversations and were clam, but sometimes we would just argue about something and not let it go. Not like a mean argument like "you're ugly" and "you're stupid". But more about psychology, astronomy, politics, religion, philosophy and some physics. Now when I read that we sound so nerdy but whatever...
The thing is, I'm very stubborn and always have to have the last word, and he likes to point out my every flaw in my argument, so it would go on and on. It was more of a heated dissolution...Not mean at all...
I can relate to when people say that you guys look like a married couple. People always asked us if we were a couple too.
That being said, you obviously like each other and are friends, but I don't know if she feels like she wants it to be more...In my case I didn't...
But, take a chance, if you like her, ask her out, maybe she'll say yes -awesome! If she says no, you can move on and if you play it right you can keep being great friends...
If I missed something let me know, and I hope this helped!
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Not weird, because I used to look forward to arguing with the guy I used to like. I thought that he liked me because of this (and many many other things he did). But he told me he liked other girls so I forced myself to stop liking him. It took a long time before I stopped myself from accepting all his flaws, but once I do see them as flaws, I stopped liking him. I don't think he enjoyed the arguments the way you enjoyed it with your crush. He just liked to argue, with anyone. I fell for that jerk :(
I would say there's room for growth to be more peaceful
one of my ex bf's argues with his girl all the time and it's almost like they're in grade school
it could be a sign of immaturity or just not having the ability to discuss things in a calm manner
myself and my fiance, we rarely fight. we have had one and it was when I sat him down to talk and never raised my voice, but he's seen me raise my voice at others...
I don't find that odd at all. It's just when you get into a relationship (depending on how badly or much you argue) you will eventually grow tired of it and may even begin to feel drained. All that builds into tension and it's just a matter of time...Even if it is just all fun and games if you are seriously not agreeing on anything it will get to you.
The way I say it, arguing a lot could be because of two reasons, both extremes. Either great admiration or intense hate. Like, if a person who disagrees with me doesn't mean anything to me, I wouldn't waste my time on arguments because ultimately I'll just feel like I wasted my time trying to convince someone to think like me, when that someone holds no importance in my life. But if I'm giving my time and my energy into an argument, it's either because I admire the other person enough to give my time trying to make them understand my point on view on something, or it's because I hate that person enough that I'll use my energy to prove them wrong and myself right.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
Well, I was in a similar situation, and when I was asked to prom by her, it shocked me. After a bit of courage on my part, I admitted that I had feelings for her and she said that she felt the same for about the same amount of time as I had. She said that she will go as a date, but since we are near the end of our senior year, and we are rank #1 & 2 at our school in all AP classes with jobs, she said that she doesn't think that we could handle the extra stress of a S/O. I agreed and we both said that we would try it when we were done with the extra stress. For now, we are being much less argumentative and much more flirty.
Some people are into that, I'm not, I like calm, talking through things and working together. More often than not arguing a lot outside the end of puppy love to get over that hiccup isn't a good sign.
not sure about "like". I think it's more personality and the little children inside that area ttracted.
some people like to argue and fight for what is true, to them. your views are differing and so you are challnging each other, and are comfortable with the banter.
it's good now, maybe you will enjoy that forever and you can argue into eternity. for me, I'd get tired constantly being wrong or defending what I believe or changing... and you said it at the beginning, you don't like to argue. There could be a commication issue going on, in terms of what is said, how it's said, clarity.
I'd be exploring what those inner children are like, what traumas they experienced to assess why you are 'clicking' and figuring out the value of healing. as it is, you likely will bond at some point and then the work begins.
Arguing is a signal that there's a problem and you are close enough to each other to express your thoughts. Tension can be ok. Like if my son wanted to do drugs, i would argue with him, there would be tension. That's ok. Now, problem solving to work out the issue is the love that shows that you two know how to get over hurdles and are ready to face more together.
No, I think that people who argue a lot aren't really a good match for each other. I used to be in a relationship with almost continuous fighting at to be honest it was nothing but tiring. With my boyfriend now we almost never fight (once or twice in 4 years). We care for each other way more than we care about proving whos right or wrong therefore we find compromises almost immediately.
I went on two dates with a girl and after that she turned everything into an argument. She was insecure, thought I was a player always out fucking other girls. In the beginning she said she was surprised she wasn't out of my league. Never did get her out on another date even though I wanted one but it always baffled me how she would always respond back to a text from me even like a year later. Anyone on here that follows my posts knows I can land a date easily, but can't keep a girl around to save my life lol.
No me and a ex friend did that and he always start it I never like him he got annoying over time and we really need to stop the bs oh he a dick to her she should like him and give him a chance. No! you should only date people who respect you not someone who always argue or being rude to you.
Arguing actually, or conflict in general, is a display that indicates there may be a problem in the relationship (this means intimate or friendship even). So going as far as bring it up to the person also can be a show of sign that they're willing to go through a rough path in order to fix it and stay in the relationship. I mean if you don't like a person why would you even care to argue with them? haha
Why would you fight it argue with someone your don't care about. Honestly, if I fight or argue with a spouse it's usually because I want to fix the problem and reach a compromise. If I didn't care about that person, I wouldn't make the effort.
I agree with this, I think couples argue because they care about each other, I'd be a lot more worried if my boyfriend didn't argue with me than if he did.
You don't really get angry/frustrated with someone who you don't really care about.
Uncommon but not weird. If you like her, in your next bickerama throw her a curve ball and tell her so. You might get a pleasant surprise. Imagine of all the witty ripostes you can think up while making out.
I wouldn't want to date someone if we argue/fight a lot. That's just a red flag for me and if we are fighting before we even date then how the heck is it going to be when we date? We are just going to annoy each other
I think that arguing means they feel really comfortable around eachother, so they freely express how they're actually feeling et.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Ask her out! I bet she likes you! I've had this relationship with guys too (i'm a little stubborn and assertive) and I have liked the guys I argued with like an old married couple.
Agree. It typically is the way they are saying they like each other. The arguing is to get the respect worked out before taking the first step of going out with each other.
Not arguing, more like light teasing. What you're talking about seems more like debates which allows incredible insight in thos woman and that makes for a much stronger connection.
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