When a girl says she doesn't want a relationship right now, what can you do?

basically if a girl tells you she's too busy right now to have a relationship or that she doesn't know if she wants to start one right now but tells you she likes you and she knows you like her. we've been kinda going out for a couple months and this was the result when we talked about where we were at. anyways I believe her cause I know the issues she's dealing with right now and they are pretty major, and for the sake of this question lets just assume she's not blowing me off kindly haha.

so what are some options I have if I want her to be my girlfriend in the future, hopefully near future cause I don't want to wait forever and probably can't wait forever. do I still try to spend time with her and just keep showing her what a good guy I am, or should I just completely back off. what can happen in either situation. I know I can't demand her to choose now if she wants to be my girlfriend now or never, is there anything I can do or say to her to speed it up I guess?


Most Helpful Girl

  • i think you should hang around, don't completely back off. if she's really worth it to you you shouldn't mind waiting. what's the difference between dating her now and dating her when she's ready? if it's really HER that you want, and not just a relationship for this time in your life then waiting shouldn't be that big of a deal.

    Not to say she's testing you, but this is really a test to see how serious you are about her. If she asked you to wait and you do so willingly she knows that you really care about her and wants the best for her. But if you don't wait, or you're reluctantly and begrudgingly waiting...then she'll know to move on, save herself from getting into a relationship that's only going to end with a broken heart.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I am in the same predicament! I feel for you man. Its really hard to say without knowing how much you know about women, how long you've been "talking", or any other specifics. Hell i consider myself to know a lot about women and I'm still confused. Learn to read body language. Take what she has verbally said and frankly throw it out the D@mn window because thats about how much its worth. Communication is composed of 55% body language, 35% tone of voice, and 7% is the words that came out of her mouth. Most often when women say "I just dont want a relationship" she is simply saying without even knowing "I havnt found a man thats stolen my breath yet." Lets be honest here. If you met someone, in the middle of any life scenario, and the unexpectedly stole your heart and captivated your mind... would you hesitate? Do a little research and try to remember past conversations, her body language. Was she open, closed, stand off ish? Learn about the female/male psyche and relationships. I've done a lot of research in my day being a Psych major... but what it really comes down to is that for the time being you two are not together. Dont hold yourself down for this girl. Its not right to hang back and not make yourself available because she said "i like you too." Unless she said "I do" there is no reason to put her above yourself. Love yourself FIRST. Dont go looking for a relationship but do make new friends. Girl friends as well as Guy friends. The larger your friend basis is, the more friends of a friend you will meet. Take yourself out, do things on your own, experience things and grow as a person. You dont NEED this girl. At this point there should be ABSOLUTELY NO emotional connection to her. In the end if she comes back around and your still single, then great. If your not and your with someone, well then it better be with someone that made you forget about her or you shouldn't be with the new girl in the first place... just my two ยข.