Ladies, If your boyfriend / Husband got fired from work , would you despise him?

I always had the idea in my mind that if for any reason it happens that I loose my job , even if I do my best , then I will loose my worth.. and my near and dear will look down on me. I am not talking here on someone who has no goals or no will for life.. I i am talking about someone who is trying his best .

This question has a poll!

Updates:
Hello, first thank you for your replies , I am not talking about being fired for misconduct or sexual harassment., stealing etc.. I am talking about work related issues.. performance, difference with boss , work stress.. etc
 

What's Your Opinion?

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • My husband lost his job a while back, Making a descent salary . I didn't want to leave him just for that , Things happen. He took jobs here and there , Than a guy who was very successful who owned a dealership focusing on European cars . Asked him to be his lead mechanic , Which lead to him later being partners . The money started rolling in big time, My husband went to college and something totally different than being a mechanic. But because he lost his job, He took a mechanic job at walmart . Everyone said with his talent he could do better than that , But his thing was taking care of his family . Because he swallowed his pride , He learned a lot from working there . With the extra training from his partner , He became an excellent mechanic . His last job that he lost , He made about 60.000 to 68,000 a year . With him being a partner , And fixing mercedes on the side . It took his salary to 80,000 to 95,000 a year,

    • thanks

    • God bless you and your family . May you always be in wealth

What Girls Said 29

  • ya if I depeneded on him for the bill and we got kids

  • WHAT. Aw... Definitely not! I agree with others that I would be annoyed if he doesn't start looking for a new one. But yeah, during this time, we would should be extra supportive, seeing as our guy was the one fired and that's not a good feeling. Probably help him find a new job too, console his ego (if it at all needs consoling X]) and just be there for him. That's more important. What if it was the other way around? Would you look down on your girl because she lost her job? Hopefully not...

    • That is wonderful. And of course I wouldn't look down on her :)

  • I wouldn't think any less of him for losing his job...i would hwever, become annoyed if he makes no effort to get another job.

  • I would love him and support him regardless and help him pick himself up and find a new job.

  • Despise? No. We might ask questions about it but that doesn't mean we despise you.

  • No, I would encourage him to start his own business or help him with another job. If need be, I would get a job or second to support my husband. We are in together for life, lol. I would hope the guy would be understand if he was me. Life is not perfect and in my area, people who are engineer or someone who makes $100,000 can get pink slip when people stop ordering aircrafts. So it happens, but I would be understanding and I hope for the same toleration from my husband/partner.

  • No, I wouldn't despise him. What if I got fired? I would expect him to be supportive, so If it happened to him it would not be different.

  • Well a lot of people say "do the best you can..." but often a person can do better if they try. So if a guy came with excuses as to why they were fired then I'd be disappointed. If the guy was the best worker ever then barely anything would result in them being fired (with the exception of sexual harrassment, stealing, etc).I mean I wouldn't think they lost their worth, I'd just be disappointed. If they began making excuses and saying its not their fault and getting mad at the company (without me asking) then I'd think of them a bit less. People are fired all the time because there is someone who does the job better. So I don't think excuses are reasonable. Of course there are exceptions.I wouldn't think theyd lose worth in my eyes. I'd be disappointed but if they didn't make excuses and wasn't lazy about getting another job then my thoughts of them would be restored.Keep in mind this is how I'd view anyone, not just my boyfriend. I'd view myself this way.

  • I would never despise my boyfriend if he lost his job. Although I do believe my boyfriend has the same mentality as you. Honestly speaking, I prefer his peace of mind and happiness over his pay cheque. Particularly if it was stress related and it just became too much to deal with for him yet he was trying his best to stay a float etc. My boyfriend is 30 and I love him, he's not too happy with his career life these days, so been trying to explain to him that I'll support whatever decision he makes. When you are in a relationship, the goal is to become a united team ( that means looking out for each other happiness and supporting each other). The goal shouldn't be becoming wealthy or certain status. It should be loving each other, working to understand each other better, and achieving a level of financial security together. If you can't make it through the hard times together then perhaps you weren't meant for one another.

    • I would put it simply. He is lucky to have you around. . Wish you both the best mmy dear friend and thank you for this encouragement. !

  • No I wouldn't despise him at all but we would have to find another way to bring in money for the bills etc

  • Despise is a strong word, but if he got fired for "misconduct or sexual harassment., stealing etc.." I would be angry and think he was getting lazy/expected me to pull both our weights. That is not okay.As for the other stuff (work related issues.. performance, difference with boss , work stress.. etc) I would feel bad for him, but if he didn't get another job soon, I would wonder if he really didn't mind getting fired. I'm nobody's sugar momma.

    • I have mentioned it in the update that this is not for any misconduct ..

    • I would definitely dump him if he did sexually harrass anyone or act like a punk though (the first set of reasons for getting fired). That's immature and disrespectful.

  • first off, being fired would be a huge blow to your man's ego so despising him won't do any good. second, if that isn't the time when he will need you, as his woman, by his side supporting him, then when is?third, it shouldn't matter what other people think because its between you two; its your relationship. If your near and dear are not as supportive, maybe theyre not who you think they are..in which case, reevaluate

    • Really good answer :)!

    • I am happy to hear people have such sensibility

  • i put no but it also depends on why. If it was just a work performance issue then I wouldn't lose respect for him but it also depends on the exact situation too.

  • No, I'd feel really bad for him and would be pretty anxious as to how to make him feel better about it.

    • That would be very nice of you . I think you only need to just be by hi side and understand . Pick him up a bit but you don't need to be anxious about it. Just knowing you will support him ( emotionally) will be enough for him

  • well, it would really depend on WHY he was fired. for example, if he was at his job busting his back every single day and giving 110% and lost his job due to workforce reduction or something like that...then, I would have no hard feelings at all. BUT if he was up there just lazing around and doing absolutely nothing at all and calling his boss every not-nice name in the book...then I wouldn't coddle him when he came dragging through the door moaning about how he had just gotten fired. I'm not saying that I would full-on DESPISE him, but...i definitely wouldn't be happy.

  • If I'm married: I know that I ddnmarry him for money, obviously. Besides, I married him and would love him through thick or thin, rich or poor...etcIf boyfriend: Ill help him find other. Get those resumes printing and revised :)

  • Depends on the reason upon which he was fired... Sexual harassment, stealing, well then, pack your bags. But for the general reasons someone gets fired (lack of productivity, downsizing, so on) that would be the time he would need my support most. Plus in my mind, I don't think I should rely solely on his work to support us. It would be time for me to take the lead while encouraging him to get back on his feet again.

  • I wouldn't be upset. We all make mistakes, a lot of people get fired. If you were trying your best and got fired, well maybe that wasn't the job for you.I think the biggest challenge when you get fired is to realize that you are not a bad person and you aren't worth nothing. Sometimes the working environment and your own working style just didn't match up. That happens, it's not something you can change. Maybe it was good that you were fired. Maybe your next job will be the perfect fit!My mom was fired once, but she eventually got a job with a better environment. She was unhappy at that place, and the people were really rude. They fired her because they didn't want to pay her so much, they wanted someone cheaper. And she was upset when she came home, and I told her it was probably the best thing that could have happened to her (because she was unhappy). And now she is much happier.

    • You're welcome, glad I could help!

    • Thank you !

  • I think it would depend on the reason.If he was downsized.. or made a critical error, probably not.But if he was canned for inappropriate conduct with female co-workers..HELL.TO.PAY.

  • of course not. I'd be supportive. that would be the last thing he needed

  • That's absolutely insane. I would only be mad if he didn't get right back up and at least try to find a new job.

    • Actually, even that depends. If we were married or living together and our continued comfort relied partly on his income, I would probably get upset sooner, like if he wasn't looking after a week or two. If the relationship was new or not very serious, I probably wouldn't care at all.

    • Obviously not. I would probably only get upset if he let like a month go by.

    • If he was shocked and needed like a few days to start to apply for jobs again.. like to de stress .. would you be mad?

  • Heck no! If you're really trying then of course not. Especially in this economy, it's so easy to lose jobs.

    • Glad you think so! Us good ones are out here :)

    • You all girls are just so nice, supportive and strength giving and a good companion, its like opposite of mostly what people say about them here, but you all are true gems, so understanding and cooperative.

  • Nope. It happened to me. He got fired and I stood by him. I put trust my judgement that the man I picked will get through it.

  • No way, he's the love of my life. I would only support him to make the best of it for his new job.

  • You will not loose your worth.

  • there's no reason to despise him!although at first I will get mad but a simple explanation is worthy..and I will understand him as he understand and love me!:)

  • What? Not unless he got fired for like, beating someone up or something.

    • It happens to a lot of people!

    • because he couldn't make it ? rejected?

    • That's perfectly normal, why would I look down on him? I'd empathize and be frustrated at the boss.

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  • Women aren't evil, you know.

    • I really don't think of women are evil.. at all ...

  • Of course not you don't find those type of guys every day; I wouldGet a second or third job if I had to !

What Guys Said 5

  • Interesting question. I was encouraged by the responses. There are some understanding ladies on here. I've known of people who's wives/GFs have left them over money issues. That's pretty cold. But at the same time, in the old school mindset, the man is not truly a man if he cannot provide for his family. It sets the table for an interesting conversation about gender roles, and mores specifically what we define as masculinity.

  • No.And I don't believe the poll, I bet most women would despise them.

  • Never be placed in a position of being fired w/o having a new job in your pocket.

    • A good woman will temporarily understand this, support it ... but not without CASH results soon forthcoming

    • Even though it harms your resume to jump continuously to other jobs - you WILL find a home that fits, then will promote you + raises, enough so that outside offers become temporarily moot

    • If you are always looking for a better one, how long you should stay and the job you have right now ?

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  • Most wouldn't. However if he stays unemployed for a long time, they may start feeling differently about him.It wouldn't have a big short run impact on their emotional state.

    • a week is not that long.

    • what if he was shocked and needed a week to absorb the shock! Like it really cut into him and needed to absorb it.

  • i doubt if a woman was in a serious relationship with you, she would dump you or despise you for being laid off. as long as you're searching hard for work, and not leaning on her too much for support.

    • I just have this feeling that the moment one is down .. then you are a prey to feast on.

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