Girls, Ex that dumped me asks what to return and where to drop it off only to ignore me?

[Anonymous]

So basically my ex dumped me and a day after getting dumped I asked for all of my things and asked if we could be adults about this situation (since I knew she was ignoring me). She blew up on me saying if we wanted to be adults that I already fucked it up, then she said "fuck u" and that "i'll give you your things". The next morning I dropped off her things at her door. She said those things a week ago and there was no communication between us until today. Today she messages me asking what things I needed and where to drop them off (I literally already told her what I needed). I told her I needed them tonight since tomorrow I go home (this is true by the way not some bluff) and went on to restate everything I needed. I know she read my messages because after every message I sent she immediately went online and then hopped off for every message. She hasn't responded and I don't see her responding in a while. Why did she ignore me (again)? Is she just trying to test me? Did she want me to beg and plead for her to reconsider and then ignored me when she was disappointed that I didn't? Is she scared that I was serious about moving on since I was focused solely on getting my things back? Please help me, I can't do this anymore.

[Needadvice1202]

Looks like she's still very angry with you, too angry to respond possibly
What caused the breakup might explain more

[Asker]

This past month I've been rather depressed over losing my scholarship and learning my mom got cancer again so she said I was making her feel bad and that I was treating her poorly (I def would be upset and sad around her but I'd never directly take it out on her). I don't understand why she'd still be angry after an entire week of me leaving her alone and returning her belongings. We had a really dumb fight on the 19th because I rejected to watch something with her as I had to leave for studying and she said I was being a dick and that she couldn't do it anymore. I tried convincing her to give me a chance and she said fuck you and threatened to hit me, she said to get away so I left the room and she screamed at me again saying I always walk away from the problem. After I said I was sorry she said it was too late and said she gave me too many chances (we had like 4 fights before this in a month over really stupid things) and I packed my things. After the fight and right before I finished moving out she sat me down and said she loved me and how she'd give me another chance but that things would be different and I agreed. I was living with her and thought she needed the space and that it was best to return all my things to my dorm anyway so I forgot several things.

[Asker]

3 days later she tried dumping me over text after I dropped off a textbook she needed and a 4 page hand written where l said I was deeply sorry and how the distance and time apart made me realize the pain and discomfort she went through and how I'd treat her much better. I begged and cried to meet her in a phone call and she met me and said it was all a mistake, that she felt a million times better w/o me and that she was firm in her decision. I asked things (bc I was blindsided) like didn't you love me and she said I was being manipulative.

[Asker]

It seemed we ended on good terms bc she gave me a hug at the end and said she was grateful and how we'd never get together again. I asked for my things back and she said tomorrow. Next day rolls around and I text for all of my things, she gets mad after I knew she was ignoring me (she ignored all of my 5 texts and decline one of two calls) and I said "can we pls be adults about this?" and she said if we wanted to be adults then I already fucked up, then she said fuck you again and that she'd return my things. I sent a few messages saying that I was sorry and that this all hurt for me and that I just wanted to move on. Next day I left her things at her door. A week goes by with no communication from either of us and she sent me a text last night asking where and what to drop off my things (I already told her a week ago) I repeat the items I needed again and she ignored them yet again, she didn't respond and didn't drop them off. This time I didn't call or press any further. I don't see how she can hold a grudge this long if I never have threatened her, insulted her, demeaned her, cheated on her, or hit her (I can't imagine doing any of that to anyone let alone her) and she already has a tinder (despite saying she'd never use it). She did open a tinder once after an argument once to spite me so I wouldn't be surprised to see lightning strike twice. What I don't understand is why she's doing this? Is she just trying to test me? Did she want me to beg and plead for her to reconsider and then ignored me when she was disappointed that I didn't? Is she scared that I was serious about moving on since I was focused solely on getting my things back? Pls help me, I seriously just want to fix things or move on

[Needadvice1202]

Why would you ever want to fix things with someone that can't even support you when your mother has cancer, it seems too toxic, your going through enough already, honestly if your stuff isn't worth a lot of money I'd just leave it there and never answer a message from her again if she did text you, it seems selfish of her to be treating you so bad while you already have so much going on, I know breakups hurt, but guess what , they don't hurt forever, that's not the type of relationship you need, you deserve better and you will find it, your still young, sort your life out get through your own struggles at the moment, if she's a genuine person she will text you about getting your stuff back don't have any hopes just go and collect it and leave, there's no talking to her from what I can tell , just accept it and if she's really sorry and regrets her actions towards you in this difficult time someday she will come back but it's your decision if you want someone like that back in your life after leaving you alone when you need love the most , I hope your mom recovers soon, try to move on

[Asker]

I'll try, it's just super painful to move on because she's the only girl to say that she loved me and how she wanted a family with me. It's even more painful when I brought her to my family for the holidays and seeing her and my mother getting along so well. I did so much for her when no one else was there, I'd feed her, clean her place, get her truck unstuck in a snow storm, drive her everywhere since her license and registration were expired, everything. We were best friends before, and it hurts to see that she gave up on me when I needed her most after I never gave up on her. I try so hard to fight but it's so difficult. Ty for your input and advice, I'm trying the best I can

[Needadvice1202]

Stay strong it took me about 5 months to get over a hard breakup, It does take time, it's unfortunate but your feelings for her seem one sided, I can see you cared for her but her actions show the opposite about you, you deserve better and you will find better :)