Hey guys. Long story short, my ex and I broke up 6 months ago but he wants me back.
The reason why we broke up was because I didn't trust him.
For the entire relationship he had thousands and thousands of photos of nudes of other women (not celebrities, but girls who likely sent them to him), including exes, sex tapes he made with them, snapchats, girls he went to the gym with, even screenshot photos of my friends and it never stopped and was ongoing it never stopped.
I countless times sat him down and explained to him that it was disrespectful and that this was a boundary he was crossing and that it made me uncomfortable. He even made me delete photos of me and my ex and I did it out of respect to him. But he continued collecting all these photos of women and I understand men are visual and that they have "wank banks" or whatever they are called but it was getting out of control to the point of an addiction and was actually bordering creepy.
He gaslit me into believing I was crazy for being upset and having this boundary and would often say "it's not like I'm going out and cheating on you". Anyway, he wants me back but it doesn't feel like love to me, he isn't willing to delete the images and intends to continue it. i can't quite put a finger on the behaviour but I just don't understand why he is like this? Am I really the crazy one for being upset and not trusting him? Everything inside me is telling me to run from this guy. He says that I "just don't understand him" and it's true, I don't underdtand this behaviour and I can't normalise it. Why is he like this? Is it worth it to trust him again, I don't know if I am just crazy now. But I was so depressed in the relationship as a result of this and not feeling heard, it was almost as if he enjoyed seeing me upset. Any advice appreciated.
The reason why we broke up was because I didn't trust him.
For the entire relationship he had thousands and thousands of photos of nudes of other women (not celebrities, but girls who likely sent them to him), including exes, sex tapes he made with them, snapchats, girls he went to the gym with, even screenshot photos of my friends and it never stopped and was ongoing it never stopped.
I countless times sat him down and explained to him that it was disrespectful and that this was a boundary he was crossing and that it made me uncomfortable. He even made me delete photos of me and my ex and I did it out of respect to him. But he continued collecting all these photos of women and I understand men are visual and that they have "wank banks" or whatever they are called but it was getting out of control to the point of an addiction and was actually bordering creepy.
He gaslit me into believing I was crazy for being upset and having this boundary and would often say "it's not like I'm going out and cheating on you". Anyway, he wants me back but it doesn't feel like love to me, he isn't willing to delete the images and intends to continue it. i can't quite put a finger on the behaviour but I just don't understand why he is like this? Am I really the crazy one for being upset and not trusting him? Everything inside me is telling me to run from this guy. He says that I "just don't understand him" and it's true, I don't underdtand this behaviour and I can't normalise it. Why is he like this? Is it worth it to trust him again, I don't know if I am just crazy now. But I was so depressed in the relationship as a result of this and not feeling heard, it was almost as if he enjoyed seeing me upset. Any advice appreciated.
