We both cheated...now what?

I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost two years and we currently live together. About four months ago I was out at a work function and was well past intoxicated...and I ended up making out with a work colleague. I was blacked out during this period, and I honestly do not remember it, but was told by of all people my boss that this happened while she took me to a late night breakfast to sober my ass up. I started crying and demanded I be taken home so I could confess to this at once. I honestly love my boyfriend very deeply and in no way set out for this to happen. The alcohol was no excuse, but I don't feel I ever would have put myself in this position otherwise. I truly don't. I confessed to my boyfriend that morning, and he was understandably pissed, but we remained together. I ended up quitting my job over the whole situation...it was a job I had been wanting to get out of anyways, and I couldn't emotionally handle it most days anyways, but this incident really sent me over the edge.

The last few months of our relationship have felt very strained. I feel my boyfriend pulling away from me...we don't talk like we used to, we don't hang out or go on dates, and I'm not really invited out with his friends and family as much. I have felt so much guilt over what I did, I haven't had the courage to voice my concerns about our relationship. I have spent a lot of time inwardly wondering if his actions are a result of my cheating, or just settling into a long term relationship where we don't have to be glued at the hip anymore. Also, there are our new work situations...he has a new job where he works from 6am-7pm and is exhausted, while I am underemployed now and have no money to even propose we go out and spent quality time together. While I haven't voiced any concerns because I don't want to rock the boat and lose someone I love so much, I have just been getting more and more neurotic about our relationship, and feeling more insecure within it.

We got into a fight on Sunday. Today, still feeling horribly insecure after our fight, and knowing a lot of his anger probably came from from my previous indiscretion...I don't know why...but I checked his email. He hadn't done anything to make me question his actions...I guess I just wanted proof that we are good and that I am being just a nut. I ended up finding some emails back and forth of naked pictures between him and a girl. I know they were taken while we have been together because he has a newer telltale tattoo in the photos. When I asked him, he said they were "taken a long time ago". A lie, obviously.

What the hell do I do now? He is pissed I'm spying on him. I am pissed that he has allowed me to shoulder so much guilt for my actions that were unplanned...while this obviously has to have been purposefully orchestrated. Naked pictures of your **** don't just shoot themselves into cyberspace and come back with tacky girls fingering themselves. We have some trust issues, clearly
We both cheated...now what?
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