After all of the lies and cheating, when do I stop giving chances? (Page 2)

Anonymous · 2023-04-14T12:02:31Z

I've been with this guy for over 2 years. It was a long distance relationship. We were committed and willing to work it out. Or so I thought. A year and a half ago he moved in with me for what was supposed to be for good. Less than a month he left and we broke up. I later found out he had a backup plan for when he left that included his ex-wife and his children, they even had a code word for it. I had no idea. He knew he wasn't going to stay and needed a backup plan so he'd have a ride back home from the airport. A month later guess who comes crawling back and silly me let him in. 8 months later I moved over to 2,000 miles, quit my career, left my family, my friends and everything I knew to be with him. I thought I was being gaslighted but I wasn't sure till one day I was looking for an item I asked him if he knew where the item was he said I was a last person to touch it. I was looking in the kitchen which is the last place I saw it, I went into the bedroom where he was to ask him a question and he had the item I was looking for in his hand and ready to put it into his bedside drawer. Once I had a chance I looked and it WAS the item I was looking for. That's when I start his snooping. If he was lying about that, what else is he lying about I wondered. I found four phones with different phone numbers, pictures, texts, emails homemade videos (sexually) of him and his second ex-wife an much more all while we were together. When I asked him to please remove them, he met me with anger, rage and defiance. Months later he still has pictures (sexual and non sexual) of his second ex-wife that he refuses to delete, memories that has to do with the woman he physically cheated on me with and videos of their sexual relationship. I feel like this whole relationship is based on lies. I was willing to forgive and work it out. But he won't meet me halfway. My heartache is unbearable at times. When do I stop giving chances?

Anonymous

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Finchie40 Follow
Master Age: 46

1 y
445 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

You should of dumped his ass the first time he left you , why you keep taking him back is beyond me

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1 Reply
- Finchie40
  
  1 y
  Happy to hear you got away
  
  Reply
Sparkie460 Follow
Guru Age: 56

1 y

Once you broke up that should have been his last chance. You've given him way more chances than he deserves.

1

0 Reply
TheeTrybrid Follow
Xper 5 Age: 25

1 y

When u feel it's time to leave then leave
Your emotional attachment is what kept u there and now that the the attachment is gone , u see it for what it really is

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0 Reply
TheSpaceGnome Follow
Guru Age: 37

1 y

You stop giving chances after the first time they betray you.

1

0 Reply
serious_miss419 Follow
Xper 7 Age: 35

1 y

It’s a okay to be a good person and give people chances. But boundaries are also important. Disconnect with him, don’t talk or listen to him. Trust me

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0 Reply
LiamJHayden Follow
Guru Age: 28

1 y

To the same person? Cheating is a one and done. Lying can also be that, depending upon what and why.

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0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)

1 y

I have a request please Leave such person. That person will never change, i am saying this from my experience, trust me.

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0 Reply
Reorx Follow
Xper 5 Age: 43

1 y

Do you really want to fix this? Be honest with yourself & have the awareness to realize you're the common denominator & choose these guys..

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0 Reply
boobliker Follow
Guru Age: 68

1 y

as soon as you find out they have done the dirty!

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0 Reply
red324 Follow
Guru Age: 34

1 y

Who knows some of you women like the ups and downs, because that's all you know.

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0 Reply
Anonymous
(18-24)

1 y

Never.. let him keep doing it. You asked for it lol.

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0 Reply
LovrUFFAllls Follow
Xper 3 Age: 21

1 y

Its just not worth it to be with someone who can't be honest.

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0 Reply
pethouse Follow
Xper 6 Age: 24

1 y

Dog why the fuck do you keep giving him chances

1

0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)

1 y

Wish i knew. Im trapped too

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0 Reply
Stevefiveo Follow
Yoda Age: 53

1 y

You should have stopped many chances ago.

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0 Reply
Wise4myage Follow
Master Age: 22

1 y
1.3K opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

After the first time.

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0 Reply
mommymommymommy Follow
Xper 6 Age: 35

1 y

When you start respecting yourself

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0 Reply
AliSulayman Follow
Xper 3 Age: 36

1 y

You never do! Once you do, there is no way back!

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0 Reply
Greenbean27 Follow
Xper 2 Age: 29

1 y

Stop , it time to end the relationship

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0 Reply
cuteheart48 Follow
Xper 3 Age: 34

1 y

You better take a decision and leave.

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