Imagine this is you:
You break up with your boyfriend of 3 years because of a few external factors (friends interfering, distance in relationship, etc..).
Two months after breaking up, you realize that it wasn't the relationship that wasn't working, it was your own personal problems (job, living situation, etc..) and you come to find that you are even more miserable without him and just plain miss him.
You start talking to your ex daily again, but you are depressed that you are in the position you are in. You find it next to impossible to get back into your relationship and back to normal because of that depression. Your friends talk an enormous amount of crap about your ex and plead with you to stop talking to him again, and all that does is feels hurtful and upset, and you realize how important he is to you.
You finally find motivation to change your situation, you apply to jobs near him and begin talking about moving in together, like you were going to before breaking up. You even meet up a few times, and spend a weekend with him. He asks you not to treat him like an option, and you promise him that you are not. You tell him that you are stuck in a rut and just hoping a change makes everything better.
As all of this is happening, you meet a new guy that is nothing like your ex, and he shows an interest in you and you begin to feel guilty because you are now second guessing everything, especially because you care so much about your ex. You think so much about it that you figure the only way to fix anything is to get out.
You begin to find your ex annoying, don't want to talk to him, and eventually tell him this. He is confused and broken hearted. He made some mistakes, before and after the breakup. But he loves you and wants nothing more than for you to be happy.
Three months into trying to work things out with him and in your own mind, you tell him it's over, and that he needs to get over it. You don't tell him a word about this new guy.
Not even a week later, you are visiting new guy for a weekend, and get flowers from this new guy for your birthday and plaster everything all over Facebook. Meanwhile, your ex has dropped completely off the radar, and he's not giving you a reaction about anything. You don't see him on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, nothing. He doesn't even say Happy Birthday to you (he's hurt, upset, disappointed, and you told him to go away. he's afraid that chasing you will only push you even further away), and you make your status the day after your birthday a quote: "Remember that person you thought you couldn't live without? Well look at you, living."
You are this girl. What is in your mind and heart? What is your ex to do? Do you still think about him? Do you still care about him? Are you wondering why he has disappeared? Do you wonder why he's not reacting in any way? What is happening? Are you just testing the waters, seeing if the grass is greener?
I'm the ex. I am confused, hurt, broken. What do I do?
Most Helpful Girl
Yes, my love, it is the-grass- is-greener syndrome. However, I have found the grass is always greener because it is fertilized with bull s**t. She is clearly playing games with you. She wants you to chase her but at a distance. That's why the remark on FB. I think she'll come around now that you've dropped off the radar. It's sad to say it, but it's true. Women are very difficult people. I hate to admit it, but we are. She's not even sure what's in her heart and mind. She also needs to stop letting her friends lead her life. If they're her true friiends, they'll want her to be happy. It's her who has issues and it really doesn't have anything to do with you. It's HER. I know this doesn't make much sense, but I hope it helps. Good luck, sweetie.0
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