Why is it so hard to find Western girls who act like East Asian girls?

[Anonymous]

I just got back from a 3 years stint studying in China and now that I am back I am struggling to find girls that I actually like. I would kill to find a nice white girl who acts like Chinese girls but its so freaking hard. Personally I would date Chinese girls if I was Chinese. Through experience though I have learned that the language, cultural, and distance barriers are much more pronounced then you would think. When your dating a girl who's family lives 7,000 miles away from your family things get hard as you can imagine. If I could meet an American girl that would be fantastic because all those barriers would be far less pronounced. I just can't for the life of me find good ones, in China half of the girls I met would invite me over to their house and make me delicious food, or leave me little notes and cute things like that to make me feel appreciated. American girls never do that, most of them I meet can't cook at all, I haven't had any go out of their way to make me feel special or appreciated (although it seems like I am expected to make them feel special), and its hard getting along with them because they are so opinionated, selfish, or a combination of them. Whats worse is that a large portion of the female population sleeps around, and drinks, 2 things that your average Chinese girl is extremely opposed to doing. It seems like its a bad thing to be more "feminine" here in America. The American girl idea of dressing up is wearing a short tight skirt and tanktop, which is just trashy, and then if you say "I think you look better wearing more modest attire" they get mad at you and go off on you about saying "You can't tell me what to wear" instead of changing things up to please their guy. I would gladly change my clothing for my girl if she didn't like it, and I would gladly act more masculine if thats what she wanted. But here it seems like its bad to change for your parnter. I know there are great American girls out there, but why is it so hard to find them?

Updates

+1 y

1 day of walking down the streets of a Chinese city and I guarantee I will meet dozens of attractive young women who would be great people to date, but walking down the streets of an American city I just dont get that vibe from any of the girls.

[Anonymous]

I know what you mean, American/Canadian women have an extremely sexist attitude! You need to make me feel special, but I in no way need to return the favors! Generalizations (no matter how true, in some cases especially when true) you area horrible human being. Only MEN can be judged this way though. Cooking? Its sexist for a woman to do it, thats a mans job! Crtiscizing her for being an alcoholic, or being slutty, or literally anything she storms off in a tantrum. My advice, quit trying to win the lottory at home, take a vacation, go back to China and meet a girl who actually views love as a two way street!

[The_Advisor]

China is a very conservative nation. Your probably looking for a conservative girl. Most conservatives live out in rural settings. Good luck trying to find conservatives in a city environment.

[RJGraveyTrain]

That's the culture. Women here have the rights to do what they want, they aren't East Asian so they don't behave as such. We have the rights to do whatever we want and for you to try and tell them how to dress or behave is laughable.

I don't personally dress that way but I don't dress super "modest", because I'm not obligated to. If a guy doesn't like how I dress, he can find someone else.

[RJGraveyTrain]

I'm Canadian by the way, and I don't sleep around. Virgin, as a matter of fact.

Weird how when you assume every girl is the same you find out that you're wrong. No wonder you can't find the good ones, your attitude is a turn off.

[Asker]

I never said every girl was the same, I specifically said "I know there are great American girls out there" acknowledging their existence, its just there are more not so great ones. And either way having rights doesn't mean that you should take everything a guy says and ignore it, the key to a successful relationship is caring more about the other person then yourself, and caring about what they think. Just a quick look at the divorce rates of the West and China will tell the story. You unintentionally demonstrated this fundamental difference in your response "if a guy doesn't like how I dress he can find someone else", even beyond dress, this is a very vanilla answer for many Western girls. They basically tell the guy "either deal with my problems (which I am not going to work towards fixing) or leave". They could work hard like Chinese girls do to make the relationship work out, by acting selfless and caring, but thats too hard for many of them who end up just finding another guy.

[RJGraveyTrain]

OOOH so you've met ALL Americans girls enough to assume that there's most bad ones?

#logical

[Asker]

You are actually displaying another cultural difference that bothers me too, but its not actually related to the question so I'll just summarize it. In East Asia: Generalizations=okay, in the West: Generalizations=worst possible thing ever. Anyway I'm assuming you have never studied statistics in your schooling? Statistics is basically studying populations and making generalized statements about them based on the information you have on hand. Based on the sample of American women I have met I can safely conclude that the majority of American women I would not be attracted to.

And either way where did I actually say "All American women" I'm beginning to think you are just blind, I said "many Western girls" and I said "there are more not so great (American girls)"(then good ones), but neither of those are implying all.

[RJGraveyTrain]

People don't like it, because it's blatantly racist to complain that women with freedom of choice for not behaving like Chinese girls when they aren't Chinese. It's laughable, ridiculous, and blatantly stupid.

[aoifeislovable]

Well they don't act Chinese because they aren't Chinese... obviously, what kind of question even is that? And changing who you are for your partner is hardly ideal... they should like you for who you are not who they want you to be...

[Bisexual_music_geek]

Lucky for you us Chinese Americans exist but are still ignored. A girl shouldn't have to change for her partner and neither should a guy. It's a cultural difference. A girl who grows up in a Western society will obviously be different than a girl who grows up with an Eastern society or culture.

[Anonymous]

This is why Eastern European women are my favorite.