No contact rule with coworker?

I'm was a friends with benefits with a coworker. He broke it off. I feel played (he got his rocks off, I didn't, then he ended it). I've been trying to do the No Contact rule for my own sanity. But we're coworkers and I see him for an hour each day (luckily our shifts only overlap for an hour). I was doing well at avoiding him, but today he went out of his way to talk to me. He's still acting distant, not flirty at all, but friendly, asking for the most recent office gossip. I fell into it and texted him that I had more gossip after he left. He just texted (immediately) "nice", which for him was pretty dismissive. I feel like an idiot because I was trying to keep away from him. I get so anxious around him. It's so uncomfortable. I'd love words of encouragement. I'm going back to trying no contact (to get distance and preserve my sanity).

Also, I'd love your opinion - it was just weeks ago that we hooked up and he ended it because we got caught at work. Him being friendly to me at work makes me nervous. Is he trying to keep the door open in case he wants to hook up again sometime in the future? I don't understand why he's going out of his way to talk to me while remaining distant. (The relationship was never serious, just friends with benefits.) Thanks.


Most Helpful Guy

  • That must be awkward


Most Helpful Girl

  • He is just trying to be professional and just have a conversation with you at work. It's not weird for him at all. You're the one that making weird and uncomfortable. You guys can still talk being that you work together, just keep it professional that's it. New rule should be no sleeping with coworkers.

    • He said he wanted to just keep it professional but he did this once before and honestly this is how it all started. And men do try to keep the door often for the future.

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    • @carlitoswayy a lot of people meet their significant other at work. But I admit this was a big mistake. I don't want to hook up with him again but I do want to prepare myself to turn him down if he's going to try again. He's very sexy to me so it will be tough but I know turning him down will be the right thing to do.

    • honestly, finding your SO at work is a waste of time.

      You dont meet your SO at work by hooking up lol.

      Yep.. He is sexy to you.

      Again, im a man and i know exactly what he is doing. Good luck.

What Guys Said 1

  • Lol..

    So you guys hooked up and now he is distant?

    It sounds like you want more than just friends with benefit.

    I can tell ur gonna give in.
    Keep getting played sweetheart

    And another piece of advice "dont shit where you eat " seriously, hooking up with a co worker.. Really? Where are the work ethics..

    • I don't want more, I just expected my fair share of fun. Are you saying that he's being friendly because he may try to hook up again?

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    • I like what we had going on. It was fun, for sure. He shut it down. Will he try to approach me again? I need to prepare myself to say no if that's a possibility. Have you ever met someone that you were very chemically attracted to? My head may say it's a bad idea but it will take a little convincing to get my body to say no.

    • it won't let me. says you only accept messages from certain people.

What Girls Said 1

  • Don't go for the no contact thing. That's stupid and won't solve anything, plus it's not necessary.
    With friends with benefits you should always be prepared to know it's not anything more. When he got off but you didn't that's kind of a dick move and might be a reason to stop fucking him, but nothing more. If you want to keep your distance, do so, but it seens like he still wants to be friends and you could be friendly to him as well.