How to get her to choose me over him, or how to finally get her out of my damn head?

[haijal]

OK, honestly I just got done watching New Moon I have read all the twilight saga I love it you have always seen myself as a hopeless romantic(spelling). But I always seem to be the "Jacob" in my relationships well somewhat relationships but the one I am actually "worried" about is my ex. I love her but I felt like I needed to break up with her at the time she would always go too far with stuff with other guys. I mean it could be just me because I do have a esteem problem when it comes to her I have always thought she was to good for me anyway. Reason I broke it off with her is once she allowed a guy to reach down her shirt with me sitting beside her which p*ssed me off...then she invited a friend from where she moved from to stay with her for a week during the summer.

she told me that they kissed but I think they did more...she said she was p*ssed at him but I came over once while he was down and they were laying down together tickling each other I think I put up with a lot of sh*t from her so I finally broke up with her I mean I know that's f***ed up what she did but I still love her that was about 2 years ago but I still find myself missing her and longing for her all the time. we meet for coffee a while back and followed up with hanging out everyday after that for the next week she was in town she moved to la for school but anyway we were kissing and what not she told me about this guy she has been with for a while but they had just broke up about 2 months ago.

she told me that she loves me still she wanted me to give her sometime to get over him and we would get back together so you know I was extra happy I was finally getting the women I loved back. but NOPE she went back to him but she still says she loves me. I just want to know how to either do something to get her to choose me over him or how to finally get her out of my damn head so I can move on because being lonely sucks ass lol I'm ready for another relationship someone I can hold lol anyway sorry for the story I just need help

[cajoi]

Well, if what you say is true, this chick is no prize. Let's take a look. Would you want to be with someone who:

1) Was in a relationship with you, but allowed another guy to reach down her shirt while you were sitting next to her.

2) Made out with (and possibly more) a male friend whom she INVITED to stay with her for a week.

3) Was kissing you and even told you that she loved you while she was "broken up" with her most recent boyfriend and "needed time" to get over him, so she just put you on the back burner.

Doesn't really sound like relationship material to me.

I mean seriously, let's be honest, this girl has lied to you before and most likely will lie to you again. I doubt she was even broken up with her most recent boyfriend while she was kissing up to you. Even if she was broken up with him, she was certainly in the process of getting back with him while she was telling you that she loved you.

Last time I checked, that wasn't the definition of love. Somebody who loves you, would never treat you like this. Do yourself a favor and lose her number.

[haijal]

Yea, I have thought the same dang thing lol I have lost her number before but she texts me from time to time so I always get it back I know its my fault I gain it again but I can't seem to help myself lol...any advice how how to forget her?

[cajoi]

I don't really think that you'll ever forget her as you were together for a few years. The trick is to just let go. If she texts you, tell her to stop. If she wont, then change your number and don't give her yours. Get yourself out there and meet people. Do something you've never done. Call up some old buddies to hang out. You never know where you'll meet your next girlfriend. Just keep yourself open to possibilities, not preoccupied with the past.