What do you consider clingy?

[Chanel1981]

What type of behavior would you describe as clingy when you begin dating someone? I've heard so many different opinions from friends it seems everyone has a different take on this subject!

[ebbyeb]

It's different for everyone and there's different increments of clingy behavior... I think a small amount of clingy to mediocre amounts is beneficial for a relationship. I'll go a bit more into depth now..

Not clingy whatsoever: This basically means that you practically have zero specific attachment to your partner. These are the types of people that more often than not will cheat on their partner in a relationship. Since they have practically no attachment to this specific person.

A mild clingy: This means that you show a casual daily care for your partner and will occasional miss them and yearn for their presence. An occasional display of clingy behavior shows interest and care for your so.

A mediocre clingy: This is the healthy middle ground between a mild clingy and an obsessive clingy. This is more or less where you can find a level of real and genuine attachment and love. A dedication so to say.. at this level the attraction/clinging can come on as a bit strong but is always with the best intentions.

Obsessed: Obviously this one pretty much speaks for itself. This is at the level of a near insanity that you always will hear about with people threatening suicide if there's a breakup or a murder etc.

Hope it helps! Nice question! :)

[Chanel1981]

Very good explanation! I like your perspective. Thank you :)

[ebbyeb]

Why thank you! You're welcome! :)

[Anonymous]

I think clingy is girl who wants approve for anything. Asking from a guy to : Text me back all the time , meet me, be with me, stay with me , if possible let's die together lol, pee in the bathroom together , always attached to the guy! If the guy doesn't do what that clingy girl wants things can get very serious she might get mentally sick always asking why he won't do that or this... it's sad!

Girls let guys come to you , never get clingy! Don't get fooled from their game
YOU be the leader and make him THINK he is the leader! You will be amazed he will do anything you say without even noticing
Play nice not dumb please my sweet sweet gender 👸

[Chanel1981]

I agree with all of this! Some of the stories I hear make me question if some people are right in the head!

[Opinion Owner]

Girl... you will be shocked so many crazy stories out there. I had a friend years ago at my job she opened a fake fb pretending to be another girl added her boyfriend and chatted with him to know if he is cheating! She ended up this way because she was very clingy and her boyfriend was ghosting her often... it's sad , sometimes it's all in your mind.. nowadays she is married to a nice guy and she seem more relaxed! Clinging won't give you a long term relationship or happiness that's why it sucks! Just let it go

[Chanel1981]

Omg! That's crazy

[JokingWithYou]

Clingy is when they constantly want to know where you are, what you're doing, why you didn't answer your phone, and if they can tag along. To EVERYTHING. I'm all for doing things as a couple but damn, sometimes a man/woman needs space, you know?

[Chanel1981]

That makes perfect sense! Do you quit seeing someone if they are clingy?

[JokingWithYou]

I personally would if it got to the point that I felt I didn't have space. A little here and there is understandable though

[Chanel1981]

That makes sense

[Mekara]

Calling me everyday just to "check up on me". Too many text messages. Popping up over my house without consulting me first.

Personally, I LOVE my me time.

[Chanel1981]

So do I! I'm all about doing nothing by myself, it's a beautiful thing!

[GeorgeDubyaKUSH]

I have a high tolerance for clinginess, since if my girl wanted to spend lots of time with me and be around me all the time I'd feel honor, cherished and loved. Whenever i have a girlfriend, I enjoy talking to her on the phone, texting her, and being around her in person, so if she likes to do the same with me then I wouldn't mind. Freaking out if I go somewhere without telling her first or constantly being worried that I would cheat on her might be crossing the line, though.

[Chanel1981]

That sounds very reasonable

[casscade]

I feel the same way

[RedThread]

Someone who doesn't value their own personal space. A person who needs to know what I'm up to or doing constantly.

Basically someone who's up my ass 24/7 and doesn't have their own hobbies and passions to spend time on.

[Chanel1981]

Nobody likes that!

[TonyRyanAgain]

5843666 texts a day.

Continuously texting me at work and getting pissed if i don't answer right away.

Wanting to spend 24/7 with me, like... that's not healthy, see your friends and family too.

She tries to make me choose between time with her and time with my daughter. She'll lose this fight every time.

Mad if i go to a friends house without her.

[Chanel1981]

These are all definitely good examples!

[TonyRyanAgain]

Not my first rodeo, lol.

[Chanel1981]

Happens frequently?

[TonyRyanAgain]

The last 3 women i dated turned out psycho-clingy.

[Chanel1981]

How soon does that generally start? How do you handle it?

[TonyRyanAgain]

Usually after sex. I let them know like, hey... you're getting super aggressive, can we slow it down a little? They agree for like a week or two then BAM back into psycho-clingy mode. That's when i tell em I'm out.

[Chanel1981]

At least you give them a heads up to change the behavior! I imagine some guys just disappear

[TonyRyanAgain]

Yeah, it's not like i WANT to end it but some things are intolerable.

[Chanel1981]

I completely agree!

[TonyRyanAgain]

Are you being called clingy?

[Chanel1981]

No lol I'm just curious because I gave a (guy) friend a hard time about double texting a girl he'd been in one date with. He acted like I was nuts for thinking that's clingy, got me thinking.

[TuMeManques]

I'm still going to be clingy though 😉

[TonyRyanAgain]

@TuMeManques it's welcomed if it's you 😉

[TuMeManques]

Sweeeeeet 💙

[Catskills]

I think the term clingy only applies is one is less serious than the other.

A woman or man can have stronger feelings than their partner has for them.. when that occurs that can be awkward.

[Chanel1981]

I think this sounds accurate

[Catskills]

If a couple are really into each other, they won't even feel like they are being clingy,,,

[Chanel1981]

Very true. I guess this question pertains more to people dating/starting a relationship

[Catskills]

Sometimes couples hit it off right away, while others need a little more time and space until they develop a little mental connection.

[Chanel1981]

I guess it just depends on the people

[Catskills]

Yes,, all about discovering connection.

[potatokin]

Needing to know everything. A big red flag is if you have to justify or explain in detail where you are going or what you are doing all the time. If their tone is like that of a protective mom who needs to know where, when, why etc. it's not good

[Chanel1981]

Fair enough!

[NJ_Casanova]

Constantly asking were you are... how you are with, etc.

[Chanel1981]

That would get very old!

[Solomonmundy]

when she gets angry at you for taking a dump too long, because she missed you too much... smh.

[Chanel1981]

Wow! That's pretty bad 😂

[MB311985]

Lol yeah that is bad

[Anonymous]

If they begin to stop you from seeing your friends, especially of the opposite gender, and if they always badger you with calls or texts when you're apart and they have to know what you're doing.

[Chanel1981]

That's all true!

[Vanjasper]

Hard to define. It has so many different ways of showing itself. At it's best it can be sweet, but at it's worst it's a nightmare.

[Chanel1981]

Very true

[MB311985]

I guess another good part to this is why are men more accepting of clingy behaviour than women?

[Chanel1981]

Interesting. How do you mean?

[MB311985]

sry I never said what clingy was for me. clingy is more someone who forces their presence on u. e. g.. you have to get to work in 30 mins and it takes 30 mins to get there and she insists she wants you to pass by before work just to see you.

the part I meant is that most of the time women feel easily pressured by guys about space maybe even if it is about feeling like he is insecure or what ever but guys are less bothered if the woman is insecure unless it get psychotic

[Chanel1981]

Anytime anyone becomes psychotic that's certainly not good!

[maturedlibra]

I often trust women easily, be ever caring her respects them but never got same response from them

my wife and 2 sons left me after 16 years of marriage life surprisingly. we seperated

[Chanel1981]

I'm sorry to hear that! Being kind and trusting are good things

[maturedlibra]

dont say sorry please, I lose my confidence and decision power when somebody see with sympathy I want my friends support me shoulder to shoulder not with sympathy hope u understand my feelings what I m trying to write

[Chanel1981]

I completely understand. It will all work out for the best, these things happen for a reason

[maturedlibra]

fine :)

[bondobilly]

I'd rather have someone a bit more clingy than one who won't call or text back for a day or two.

[Chanel1981]

At least you know where you stand I guess

[bondobilly]

I have had both, and at least with the clingy one you feel wanted/needed. one that doesn't call/text back you don't know where you stand, and it sucks.

[momo770]

Nope, I think it's been a problem for me all this time. I am very independent.

[Chanel1981]

Some of the things people tell me shock me! It makes me wonder if they are right in the head

[momo770]

I can only imagine!

[Nahid1234]

Wanting to know too much and everything too eagerly perhaps?😊

I never met what i would consider a clingy girl. 😊

[Chanel1981]

So you're saying asking what someone is doing 24/7? I would agree

[Nahid1234]

Yes haha😊

But I haven't exactly met a clingy girl ever yet haha

[Chanel1981]

I'm sure it will happen sooner or later! ;)

[Nahid1234]

I wonder how clingy and demanding she will be haha

Girl play games with me haha

[Chanel1981]

It'll all work out :)

[Nahid1234]

Good Luck

[JuanFrank7]

I know much more about clingy behaviors from guys than I know of girls lol

[Chanel1981]

Such as?

[JuanFrank7]

Like making around 85% of a convo, asking random sht just for the sake of making convo, buying lots of stuff and presents (unsolicitedly) and I could go on and on

[Chanel1981]

You mean via text or in person?

[JuanFrank7]

Both but mainly in person

[Chanel1981]

Girls buy you random presents?

[JuanFrank7]

Some of my closest friends do

[Chanel1981]

Interesting. I would never think to randomly bring a gift to keep someone's attention

[JuanFrank7]

I think it's not to "keep" the attention and additionally the gifts are small, more like kind gestures

[Chanel1981]

Very interesting

[down4fun]

always there lol. if I turn around and she's there, or already looking at me.. But I mean every time.

[Chanel1981]

When you are together obviously?

[ToruMatsuda]

When she calls 10 times in the same minute asking where I am and she doesn't let me breathe

[Chanel1981]

That would be bad!

[Eddieniceboy]

Clingy is like the fabric softener sheets in my dryer. Hard to spot and always in between or inside my pants. Ohh did I mention smells good!

[AlwaysBelieving]

Checking up on me 24/7. Needing to know where I am every single minute. Those are the main things.

[Chanel1981]

You mean asking how you are daily?

[AlwaysBelieving]

Once or twice a day is fine. Not every freekin minute

[Chanel1981]

That makes sense

[Reddwolf]

I don't I like it

[Chanel1981]

What are some examples of behavior you describe as clingy?

[Reddwolf]

I don't she can be clingy all she wants to

[Nandor]

Obsessivity

[Chanel1981]

Obsessive behavior? In what capacity?

[Nandor]

Text you all the time, get jealous and hate every other girl who can get her guy

[Chanel1981]

How much texting is all the time? Hourly? Daily? Weekly?

[Nandor]

Hourly but not at bed time

[Nandor]

I can't get enough if texting

[Nandor]

of*.

[Chanel1981]

Hourly is a lot!

[Nandor]

I have time and I like it

[TweeT9in]

never leave your side 24 7 monitor all your moves