My girlfriend is angry and doesn't want to talk. How long should I give her space?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend is angry and doesn't want to talk. How long should I give her space? I know why she is angry and we agreed before that I would give her her space during any fights, but I feel anxious. Do I wait for her to text me or should I wait a certain amount of time before speaking to her again. I almost always initiate conversations. I just want to make this okay. I wish I knew what was going through her head.

[Anonymous]

Can I get an insight on what is she angry over? Not a whole book just 1 word or a sentence.

Depending on the matter she is angry on but normally If I was you I'd give her at least 3-4 days but only once a day send a " Hi " and leave it at that.

[Asker]

We were talking about something and we were both flustered and I said I wasn't serious about it, but I think she thinks I said I wasn't serious about her.

I told her that it was the subject and I was serious about her. We spoke for a couple minutes afterwards
But then I had to go and life dictated O hang up on voice chat.

This morning, I texted her and she said she didn't feel like talking.

Sorry. This was long...

We've just talked everyday for months and I hate the thought of her being angry with me.

[Opinion Owner]

Oh well.. I remember when my 5 year old nephew desperately ask something from his mom and it was turned down, he would go to a corner and cry or be mad and his mom had to go and kinda like " pet " him and make him smile again and do what he wanted. Same is in your case, she seems to be very annoyed and hurt and you need to take it slow with her. Give her some space for a few days unless it has been many days then try slow approach like give a missed call or whatever that gets her attention then make it work.

You could call me a Philosopher but whatever.. lolol :D

[Asker]

I just feel miserable about it. I put my foot in my mouth all the time and I am respecting her wishes right now, but at the same time, I want nothing more than to make up with her.

How do I keep this from happening again? I cannot stop myself from putting my foot in my mouth with people.

[Opinion Owner]

- Read her more and more to see what she hates and likes but meanwhile not offending her. Play some " Would you rather " games or " Question Answer " games with her. Ask general girl-related questions to see how she reacts to them and learn from it... Look up on how the games work if u haven't played them to c how they work.

[Asker]

Okay. Thank you. :)

[Anonymous]

You should message her after like 12hours
I don't know what amount of time she means by "space" but you should message her to show her you're concerned. Otherwise it'll be as if you don't care

[Asker]

I can do that. Just... We're not at love yet and we both hate how quick people are to say it, but my feelings are very strong. I already told her this relationship felt more real than anything I've had before.

How do I convey that in a message?

[Opinion Owner]

You shouldn't ever rush into saying that you're in love with her.
But you can tell her that she means a lot to you and you don't like to see her upset/mad. And that you wanted to check on her. Ask her if she's feeling better

[Asker]

Thank you. :)

I also worry now that she turned on her privacy setting on Tumblr so I don't see how long ago she was on.

I just was checking the message box every now and then. Maybe she doesn't want me to check her online status? I don't know. I've kept myself from texting her like I said.

I don't want things to end because of a bad sentence and me checking her Tumblr chat.

[Opinion Owner]

Don't worry, I hope nothing bad will happen and everything will be back to normal, you just need to give it some time.
You're right about the privacy setting, when I'm upset that's what I do as well.
You should message her only once or twice but not more than that. You don't wanna seem too clingy or annoying to her cuz she's already upset. Just keep checking on her message box from time to time, so that she can see that you are worried you really care and haven't just messaged her to make yourself look good.
I'm sure she will notice how caring you are and soon things will be good 😊

[Asker]

Thank you. I was worried about being clingy just by checking on it every hour, making it look like I'm on constantly.

The whole thing started when we were asking about each other's families and then we talked about what the other would name their kids.

I got flustered and so did she and my brother teased me from behind and I told her I told him "I wasn't being serious". She heard and I'm afraid she took it the wrong way and thought I wasn't being serious about HER.

She has a trigger about being tricked by people too...

I don't know what's going on in her head. I just want to tell her I've never been more serious about someone in my life. I try to show her how much I care everyday and she enjoys it, I think.

[Opinion Owner]

It's not a problem that is too big to cause a break up, things are supposed to be ok
She may have thought that you're not serious about her, but her doubts will go away when she sees how much you really care about her and hate to see her upset, and when she realizes how happy and thankful you are to have her back
There will always be some fights in a relationship, whether big or small, but if it's a serious one, nothing will actually break it, except for lying or cheating or sth really really serious, way more serious than that
Best of luck to u both 😊

[Asker]

Thank you. Very often, she has told me we'd argue and get mad at each other so I don't think this is the end. I hope that means she anticipated something like this.

I hope not. I don't want anyone but her now. Lol. I got it bad for her.

[Asker]

Well, I sent my apology text. Maybe it was too soon or I don't know. I hope she forgives me.