How can you show interest without looking desperate?

How do you show that you’re interested or that you really like a person without looking desperate/needy?
I guess I’m just a very caring person.. I like to text and call like twice throughout the day to see how’s your day going to the person I like, but my friends tell me to be careful about not looking too desperate... any advice 🤷🏽‍♀️

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I've had this problem in the past and it's a great question.

    Showing interest isn't the problem it's dropping everything for someone. When you put someone else's needs in front of yours to the point you don't get anything back it unconsciously shows the other person that you don't hold yourself to a high standard.

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Most Helpful Girl

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What Guys Said 45

  • This can be debatable. I think this should be based on how individual reacts to it. For me I prefer to talk on the phone or be in person then text any day. To me if I'm conversating with somebody. And I get a random text and I say hold on let me talk to the person that's 30 miles away. That's rude to the person I'm talking to. Hope that makes sense!

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  • I bet people would have better relationships if we stopped rejecting people for dumb reasons like clinginess. To be honest I'm really flatered when a girl show a lot of interest in me. If I'm interested in her too I show the same level of interest fuck it.

    If she thinks I'm too clingy the too bad if I'm gonna be with a girl I'm hoping she wants to talk to me a lot and talk to me a lot and let me be a part of her life. If not then whats the point?

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  • Honestly I think you're reading too much into it there's nothing wrong with calling or texting to show that you're interested in someone. I mean do you guys kick it like that if y'all do then why not call or text there's nothing wrong with that do y'all flirt too cuz if you do then he knows you're interested already you understand

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    • Sorry about that my phone was on talk a text and when it's on that and makes typos but there's nothing wrong with calling or texting especially if you guys are cool like that. I love it when I get that call or text during the day especially if it's a time when I had a bad day so call or text as much as you want he probably doesn't mind at all

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    • Yes we hang out and been on one date, but our work schedules makes it hard for us to see each other which is why I text and call him to check up on him.

    • @Laggersbae That's even better cause it's justifiable cause it's hard for you guys to see each other due to work

  • To me you don't look desperate until it looks like you'll do anything to keep them. You freak out at the first sign they might leave, you act scared when they take a while to text back, you apologize for flirting... Stuff like that. So if you're just seeing how they're doing I don't think that seems desperate.

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    • Nah I don’t do anything of that, that’s dumb I have a life too... lol

  • Go 3days without checking on your friends wellbeing and take note of the ones who reach out to you to see if your okay because you broke your Routine , kinda of reverse ghosting , lol , but twice a day is too much in today social environment unless it's returned by a close friend.

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    • If I don’t text first then I won’t hear from him and that’s showing me he’s probably not interested so ima just cut him off... I don’t chase anyone 🤷🏽‍♀️

  • Smiling helps. But also being thoughtful helps. Thinking about what this person wants. Maybe offering to buy them a little lunch. That's what this girl offered to me yesterday. I was kinda flattered and told her that I appreciate the courtesy lol... just being thoughtful in any way you can really helps... but only some people can really pick up on thoughtfulness. Not everyone does. People who think abstractly, people who think under the surface will notice thoughtfulness. I do.

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  • Don't worry about it and find someone who appreciates those things about you. Not everyone finds those qualities desperate or needy.

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  • I think it depends on the person really. Sometimes I love lots of messages and calls, sometimes I don't. The most important thing is to not freak out if they don't message you back right away. Sometimes people are just busy and you need respect that.

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  • I see where you are going - Let the other person set the tone and pace for things like messages - Send no more a day than he sends and try to judge how they feel from their messages by being no more than a bit friendly than they are - That should hopefully reign in the "FULL ON" you but if they like it unleash it (LoL)

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  • Just show them they are important by giving A true smile whenever you meet them, try to show them you are inerested in them by showing interests in their hobbies, while talking ask abut family.

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  • Honestly i would say. Dont matter. But i think i look needy myself sometimes lol so im not the best for this question haha

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  • Seriously, just tell him you like him. There's absolutely nothing wrong with women asking men out and he'll appreciate the straightforwardness if he likes you too.

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  • The thing with women is, they don't look desperate until they reach the stalker phase. They become overwhelmingly jealous, they watch you wherever you go just to make sure no one else can have you. That's called desperation, for they fear that losing you may be the end of most of their world.

    And only calling/texting throughout a day is a super low amount. I talk to my friends far more than that.

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    • Ooh okay that’s makes better sense... I don’t have any of the stalker attributes lol

  • Advice would go the same way your friends go. Point is if it's a new relationship then you're gonna have things to tell each other. If it becomes a habit then at some point you guys will not have anything to tell each other anymore and it will become invasive. There is nothing wrong thinking about the person you seek most just remember you both have personal space. Learn to like to miss each other to a certain measure. It's healthy.

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  • There is no "desperate". Desperate would be if you told him he rejected yiu and you continued doing ehat you sre doing. What you should do is draw his attention by making some statements of man/women relationships making it specific almost like its just for you two. Laugh arround him hug and cuddle with him as friends like lay down on him if ur chilling in the park or just give him a rich hug. After some time just either ask him out or tell your feelings or just attempt to kiss him while freindly hugging or such ^-^

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  • You can text or call me 3 times a day. There is nothing wrong with you.

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  • 2x/day says you're needy. he'll run - unless he's needy, too - at which time you'll enter into a dysfunctional relationship.
    2x/week says you're interested but cool.

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  • You don't have to check in all the time but you can talk to them when you or they are bored. Also, just be a reliable person. If you're there when they need you, they'll be there for you. It doesn't take much to show you care

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  • Thinking you look desperate is your problem that prevents you from connecting. Like most women they only think about social acceptance rather than what matters. Get over yourself and show him all the attention

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  • By not being needy. Get a life lol just let them know you like them they will either accept it or deny it at least you know where you stand. We don't read into signs that we'll as we don't like to assume so a verbal notice would be perfect

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  • by being confident with wanting them. there's nothing wrong with wanting somebody.

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  • Say hey wana go out with me and that’s it wait for the answer and if it’s a no say cool and leave if not well I have no experience when it goes to that

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  • I would be ecstatic if a women would be that interested! Yes some people are less interested when someone keeps messaging for hours on end, but if they are interested in you as well, they will answer when they can. Just dont text or call 20times in 5min that shows either needy, desperate, or an over zelus control freak. You are much better than some people out there. 2 times is nothing. If the guy says goodbye because of that, he's a player.

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    • Yea I’m not a psycho lol I know when to give a person their space.. I’m not not getting that same interest back so ima cut him off.

    • Go out and use them moves like jagger

  • A very good female friend of mine advice, woman more attractive to mystery men. Actually I don't know about woman.

    I prefer that she says how she missed me enough?

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    • @jaggersbae know his favourite person. Mother or father or aunty like that... You meet them and be friendly to them.

      Because his favourite person are your favourites persons too

  • It's like food shopping. Eat before you out shopping, if you don't wanna overspend. Please yourself before you show desire so it won't be too much desire lol

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  • It depend on the other person as their may think that showing any interest to them is needy or the opposite or just in between, it just depends.

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  • You should not desperate but keep eye to eye those boy I think then he will understand what actually you say the boy

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  • Be yourself. Don't trow yourself at people. Behave as a human. Not a sex toy not a diva.

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  • Give the person a chance to see he has a chance, not too much, but then try to be hard to get

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  • Don't know. I just ask if they're interested and if they touch my dick I'm all for it.

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What Girls Said 7

  • i think having a genuine care about someone and how their day is going is amazing, not desperate, and more people need to be like that!

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    • agreed I love when a girl is texting me and calling me a lot. If I have something to do I'll just tell her I'll get back to her at (insert time) we should make a certain level of clinginess trendy again :)

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    • I would rather be called or text too much instead of not at all or very little.

    • @MM442 yea I would think anyone would.. 🤷🏽‍♀️

  • As long as the “vibe” is there, text and call when you want! Obviously if he is not calling or texting first ever, or he does not seem excited when you call, or worst case scenario he ignores you, then you need to re-evaluate and move on. However, life is wayyyy too short not to show interest and go with the flow. So just be sure not to think so much, and whatever will be will be!

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    • He will sometimes text me first, but I do find that I’m always the first to call.. I just don’t wanna come on too strong, but you’re right girl life’s too short

    • I understand! Kind of in the same situation rn! I asked my guy friends, and they told me that in the beginning it may be awkward for a guy to call. I think that’s silly but hey! Lol. I think he’s interested in you, just see where it goes. (TRUST ME I KNOW THE SUSPENSE SUCKS)

    • Yea and plus I don’t want to waste my time if he’s not.. Ima just see where things go like you said. Thanks honey 🌼😊

  • Tone it down a little, some people need space ya know? Only text when they text you or only call if they want to talk on the phone

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  • Look at their reactions to your display of interest. If they give one word answers and don't ask any questions back, move on coz that is when you seem desperate.

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  • Smile often and laugh at his jokes.

    Hit him up but when you have something funny to share or something sweet but don't overdo it

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  • For the right person it won't be a problem

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  • It’s practically impossible

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