Is it a bad idea to go to a guys house for the first date?

[Anonymous]

So I’ve been talking to this guy I met online. Is it bad for me to go to his house for the first date?

Duh! It’s a terrible idea.

I don’t see anything wrong with it.

[femalewolf]

Is it a bad idea to go to a guy's house for the first date?
This is a question that many women ask themselves when they are dating. There are a few things to consider before making this decision.

The first thing to consider is your safety. You don't know this guy very well and you don't want to put yourself in a situation where you could be in danger. If you're not comfortable going to his house, then it's probably not a good idea.

Another thing to consider is the message you're sending by going to his house on the first date. You're essentially saying that you're comfortable with him and that you trust him. This could be interpreted as you being easy to get into bed. If you're not ready for that kind of message, then it's probably not a good idea to go to his house.

The last thing to consider is the logistics of the situation. If you're going to his house, then you're going to have to figure out how to get there and how to get home. This can be tricky, especially if you're not familiar with the area. If you're not comfortable with the logistics, then it's probably not a good idea to go to his house.

So, is it a bad idea to go to a guy's house for the first date? It depends. You'll need to consider your safety, the message you're sending, and the logistics of the situation. If you're not comfortable with any of those things, then it's probably not a good idea.

[Jesslin412]

Just be careful. I wouldn’t. But I have. I talked to a guy over a summer. He worked out of town and finally he was home and I came to his house. He wouldn’t take me out or pick me up for who knows what reason. But I really wanted to meet him after talking to him for 3 months. We had a good night. He had no food 🙄 all I ate was raspberries at his house. I was super nervous and couldn’t talk. We cuddled and kissed. He was the second guy and second time I had ever kissed. He wanted to do more but I was too nervous and wanted to be dated not a hook up. Could have gone better but could have gone a lot worse. There was no way I could have defended myself had he tried anything.

[Jesslin412]

Went to my bf’s house on the second date because I could only see him on Sundays at the time and a show we both watched was on. He cooked me dinner and was a perfect gentleman. We’ve been together now for 11 months

[Nxtawm]

I'd say the first rule of any date is to not have a date at one of you guy's house, have a date outside (cafe, movies, walk, etc).
The first and most important rule of a first date where you meet ONLINE is that you have a date in a PUBLIC area with lots of people

[Itsok2behapp-e]

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and will have a different take on this one but my gut feeling is he calls it a date when in fact it's more of a hookup.

I could be wrong but... Doesn't hurt to ask a question or two, for example:

A) What time would you like me to arrive?

B) What do you plan on doing when I get there?

C) Will I be fed, watered and looked after?

D) How will I get home?

Gauge his responses and you'll start to get to know his intentions. Be prepared as he may even become defensive and mask his intentions by suggesting things like "It's a surprise"

Just out of interest when is this 'first date' planned for?

[Itsok2behapp-e]

Thank you for MHO x :-)

Enjoy yourself by all means but stay safe whatever you do!

[OlderAndWiser]

Are you just looking to have sex and nothing more? Go to his house.

Do you want to get to know him so you can determine whether there is any spark and mutual interest? Stay away from his house.

Next question!

[Logorithim]

Unless you know him pretty well previously, no way should you do that (he's obviously interested in having sex) since you aren't acquainted with him. I've gone to her place for some first dates, but never had one over to mine.

[kitty71]

and why is acceptable a man going to a ladys house for a first date than to a girl going to a guys place for the first time? What is the difference here?

[Logorithim]

@kitty71: It's her turf and she's more comfortable there. I got invited, so she must have been comfortable with it.

[Partywithtom]

Because you can't have sex, kill, kidnap, or rape her at her place. Makes sense.

[Guynextdoor1]

@kitty71 I ask the same question

[Guynextdoor1]

@Partywithtom so a woman/girl can't be killers? I think this gender is too underrated

[Anonymous]

I'm actually in a similar, but opposite situation. I called her to my flat, for the simple reason that I want to get to know her in a comfortable environment. We have talked houes through text, so physical contact is logical at this point, but I don't want much from her, just maybr talking or cuddling. And I am not an evil. person, and she knows this.

Yet she doesn't trust me.

Now, I don't blame her, but I wish she was more level headed. Instead we will go to a café, where we will inevitably be slightly uncomfortable, and chances are I won't get anything out of the first date unless I play my cards right. I don't have a problem with taking things slowly, but this is excessive. And the joke is that she wants it too, she is just afraid of... something, but I can't fathom what. Commitment?

So yeah. My advice, ask him what his intentions are, and if you trust him enough, and your intentions match, go for ut

[pleasestopthis]

She's probably scared of being used for sex.

[Opinion Owner]

@pleasestopthis @pleasestopthis Probably, and I don't blame her. It would still be easier if she wasn't though

[markscott]

It's a bad idea. Meet him some place that is very public, and stay in public places, until you know enough about him to trust him.

[musicbrain5]

Terrible idea. You don't even know this guy. Always do the first meeting in a very public place (like a busy coffee shop or something), and have a friend available through text or have them call you at a certain time so you can bail on the date if you have to.

The fact that he just invited you to his house right off the bat is a bad sign to me, though.

[MimiHashima]

Talking to a guy online you don’t exactly know... but yet it seems like a good idea to go by their house? That’s beyond bad ideas vice versa... especially on the first date... anything can happen and you’d be the last to stop it. Best to get to know the person better in person around different places.. maybe even with fam and friends... otherwise, it’s just a mess and asking for trouble...

[MimiHashima]

And hopefully your not one of the girls that say, the person isn’t like that or would never do such things to me... there’s a saying “you’d think you know a guy”... this can be on both girls and guys. But just a precaution measure and standards thing... if they keep urging/pressuring you especially to go to his home for the first date, although you keep telling them to try a different place like going to a park, a movie, coffee, or something public like that, and they keep refusing, you should have that red flag feeling coming up somewhere that something’s off and it doesn’t seem like a good idea...

[Temporal_Ice]

Because you said you met him online, its incredibly stupid and dangerous. That's just with anyone you meet online. The best place to meet someone online in person for the first time is in a public place such as a busy park, or a coffee shop. Somewhere there will be witnesses in the event the person you met is not what you think they are.

[Chaz269]

I voted yes, but my opinion is really "it depends". First and foremost, if you can handle yourself, don't sweat it. Second, if it's meant to be a larger get-together, show up late and survey the field. If there are multiple guests of both sexes, no problem!
Otherwise, don't fuck with it. While psychos might be the extreme minority, who wants to risk being among those statistics?

[pleasestopthis]

First date on his home? sounds like a booty call.
People don't usually have dates on their home unless they know each other well enough and are comfortable with each other... unless they just want to have sex.

[chrisbigman]

I think so, yes. You need to get to know this person first before you "go into their territory". How do you know for certain this guy isn't a psycho and doesn't have his house set up as a dungeon or that he's not going to kill you? You can do what you want, but if it was my daughter or niece, I'd tell/suggest to them no.

[ShineDJJ]

Yes. This sounds like something out of a Lifetime movie. You have no idea if you're being set up for something.

[xEmmorixX]

Lifetime is life

[EmmaMary]

Not something that I personally would ever do.
You simply don't know what you could be letting yourself in for.
Please do take care and stay safe.

[AngerSquares]

OOoo he sounds kinda JANKEY. Bad idea don't go to his house on the first date. He may be a little naive but i wouldn't bet your safety on it. " Oh the bath room? its down the hall past the sex dungeon. Yes yes don't mind the screams."

[prettynormal]

Lol!! But you’re right

[TadCurious]

I would advise against that. I think the first time you meet him you should do it in a public place where you have your own way to get home.

[Anonymous]

very bad. it means he's trying to get laid on the first date

DONT BE THAT GIRL

MAKE HIM WAIT

IF YOU WANT A GOOD MAN, YOU CAN WAIT, AND SO CAN HE

[Asker]

True! Thank you! :)

[Carley99]

No don't do that the only way that would be smart is if you knew in person for a while

[Beautiful-Creation]

You should meet in a public place for the first date in my opinion. Just as a safety precaution until you both get to know each other better.

[boggboss]

If u are looking for sex sure if not then it's stupid

[joydivision]

HORRIBLE IDEA. He’s not putting in effort; he’s trying to get you drunk so he can talk you into bed. A real date involves time and consideration. Tell him he needs to take you to dinner or for coffee or whatever or you’re not meeting him.

[Gottabsavagee]

If you are ready to have netflix and chill then it’s fine!

[19magic]

I would meet anyone I met online in public, just for the fact there's some very convincing catfishers around

[Pejtu]

second or third yea but first well
if u just wanna fuck then go if u dont dont go

[Robbey]

Have you not seen 'Silence of the Lambs'?

It's an absolutely terrible idea.

[numerouno85]

Hi! I brought wine, oh chianti my favourite. Something smells delicious! whats for dinner, oh that's just the side dish of fava beans.

[Pizza_lover159]

Yes it is.. Never go to a stranger house.. so many things can happen.

[Aenetoo]

If it's an actual date, then don't do it. I've had girls over to my place before. But they were friends. We put puzzles together. Plus I'm an awesome cook and they wanted to raid my fridge.

[Dark93]

Terrible idea. You should always meet in a public space for the first date. Inviting you to his house is just his way to sleep with you as soon as he possibly can, probably getting you drunk too so he doesn't have to worry about driving home drunk.

[thebigc]

I voted you can but I will preface that by saying that it absolutely shouldn't be the first meeting place. If you go to his house after a good date, I don't see an issue.

[ENTP_EMO]

people go to each other's houses first all the time on tinder. All good

[paramkadam7]

Nothing is wrong... unless maybe he should offer a pickup

[darkstar87]

Online dating: Men worry about if the girl in the picture is 50 pounds heavier in real life or not. Women worry about being murdered.

[PrettyRegular]

I don't know what would be wrong with his house. If I would agree to go out with some girl, I could go to her house for a date. It would be actually interesting to see, how she's living.

[TheSpaceGnome]

If you don't date people that you don't know well, that question becomes moot.

[ChloeStarfire]

My first date with ex I ended up staying with him at his apartment for 3 days

[Lance1965]

Nothing wrong with that. In the past year I have invited 3 different women over for dinner and they all accepted.

[Sir089]

As long as your both comftable in doing so and you respect each other, why not?

[Giggletr0n]

Yeah, awful idea! This guy may be the sweetest guy in the world but it's not worth the risk!

[Shoenron]

First date? Stop bullshiting yourself. It's a hook up.

[Ninetales101]

Yes yes yes!! Do not go to his house for a first date. He is going to assume u want sex

[Snakeyes7]

I didn’t hear that it was a terrible idea until after I did it with my first date. Thankfully, she didn’t mind.

[lovebird007]

Because if you to hit it off great, then if he is a good guy then he'll make you breakfast in the morning...

[sidzyyy]

Date is a date it should not be dependent on the place where u go for date

[BHooper]

Maybe. If it's your first time meeting him in person yeah. You should probably go somewhere public.

[Anonymous]

Make sure you have a weapon or strong as mace just in case he's a creep or nut bird

[HereIbe]

It's just fine, if what you are after for a first night is a three-hole experience, just saying...

[m刀ﾉgんｲﾶﾑ尺乇m]

For your security, yes because it can be just for sex. Even more if it's the first time you see him

[Celtero]

Pretty damn stupid... what if he's some psycho?

[True-Friend]

Then you must be careful, unexpected events often happen before you can react!

[Athena5524]

You met him online, so no. If it was in person I would say otherwise. But no don’t 👌.

[TheHillsRAlive]

play it safe and meet somewhere public

[Sonali_star]

So the virdict is public place 👍

[SouthernGirl23]

Girl use your damn brain

[ForeverSingle28]

If You Don’t Want To Have Sex, YES

[_dardorsama_]

He could be a serial killer for all I know

[Lysander89]

Generally I would say yes it is a bad idea.

[Montana07]

Have you met before this date?

[Asker]

No that is a negative!

[Montana07]

I would definitely meet at a public place two or three times before you go to his home

[Asker]

Ok. Great! Thank you! I’m definitely leaning more towards that.

[Montana07]

Yeah he could seem amazing but so were all the serial killers. Be safe.

[Redstang88]

If you’ve never met the guy, yeah.

[Ayoooemzii33x]

Lol... obviously he's going to expect sex

[Anonymous]

Very bad. you'll regret this mistake

[emma_1567]

If you met him online than yes it is

[Clyde_123]

It's a terrible Idea.

[Introvert94]

If you want to have sex, go.