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The only woman I asked to kiss was my first love, second girlfriend. I didn’t have a lot of experience with girls and I was still getting used to the idea of attractive girls wanting my company. I really liked her and wanted to kiss her but how much I liked her overrided with time being ok with losing her respect.
I asked her via text. She texted me yes. We kissed. It was passionate. Felt like a movie. Now that I think about it that kiss is probably the best one I’ve had. And I’ve kissed a lot of girls. But that moment specifically is the most “special”. She wasn’t just “some girl”. I think it’s the build up and her giving me the green light that makes it special because of the connection.
That’s not to say that all my other kisses weren’t special or the other girls I’ve been with weren’t special. But for some reason I remember her kiss vividly. I can tell you where we were, the time of day, season, month, etc. With the other girls I just went for it and while I ended up dating them and having relationships, none of them are as special or memorable. I think the difference was me being focused on respecting her and knowing I kissed her with her blessing vs. just going for it not knowing if I’ll get slapped or not.
I’ve never been slapped. You can usually tell if a girl wants you or is at least ok with being kissed by you. And sometimes you misread them and they just dodge you which at that point you need to back off.
So the verdict? Most girls will say “Ugh. Don’t ask. Just do it.” But that translates to “Be confident! I want a brave and strong man.” If you ask, make it the best kiss she’s ever had. Kiss her with confidence and show her, that even though you asked, it’s not because you’re “timid”. Show her a little bit of your inner bad boy. If you just go for it, go slow so she has a chance to dodge or tell you no. The girl I spoke about was the only girl I asked. So I don't know if most girls would be into being asked
These days you better not only get permission, but get it in writing and have a lawyer with you!
Your question is so one sided I cannot vote my option isn't there! No man is brave enough to touch let alone kiss me so if I don't make the first move I'll die waiting for that kiss. So its always been me making the first move. But I have to be sure so he must make it clear. I ain't looking stupid out here. If he isn't interested it's cool 🤷♀️I will take my kiss to the grave.
Asking is such a turnoff for women🙈 def. NOt
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I think asking would make it more awkward, less in the moment natural occurrence. But that's just me 🤷🏼♀️ or maybe tell her "Give me a kiss" verses "Can I kiss you"
Ideal situations for me would be
1) if we reeeeaaaally develop an attraction and things go perfectly and I’m like “wow I really like this guy” for him to lean in to kiss me and obviously if I don’t retreat then go for it
2) him to wait, just in case, because that shows that he’s really into me enough to take it slow if we need to
I'm always down for a kiss so go right for it.💋💋💋💋
I think asking ruins the moment.
If you have to ask then I have to ask where the heck the chemistry is between the two people?
There should be signs.
Does she lean into you if sitting near you?
Does she brush against you as you are walking? Does she allow you to take her hand
Is she open to letting you touch her hair and most importantly does she let you brush it behind her ear and does she lean in as you do this?
Does she bite her bottom lip as she looks you Straight in the eyes then your lips?
Does she have foods (such as a strawberry icecream sweets a popsicle) linger near her mouth while she know you are looking?
Women drop hints
With me a man would never have to "Guess"
My eye contact willingness and openness to innocent touch and leaning or gently brushing against him would let him know I am ready.
One of my exes asked me if he could kiss me at the end of our first date. It was kinda sweet, but totally unnecessary. I knew he wanted to kiss me and I wanted to kiss him too. Unless he was a creep or the date a disaster and I clearly wasn’t interested, I was always fine with him going for it.
Depends on the person. And depends on the body language, some people's body language is easy to read, others don't show much, and the rule i tend to fallow is if i can't tell if someone wants to kiss me, i won't make an attempt. It may not seem very heroic or brave, but I'd rather be considerate than pushy. A good way to go about asking permission would be to just bring it up while your chilling or laying around and just bring up that you'd like to but you want to make sure their comfortable, make it funny, Crack a joke, do whatever you have to do but make sure you let the person feel comfortable no matter their decision
Guys always asked “can i kiss you?” And its sweet but kinda ruins the moment because then i freak a bit and am like “not yet.” So maybe a sneak attack would be okay but if he gets hit upside the head then that means i didn't want it 😂
You can thank #metoo for screwing this all up. I usually don’t ask BUT I’ve gotten more paranoid in the last few years. Just two years ago I had a woman get pissed off when I went for a kiss on a first date. This is after two hours of talking and we were silently making direct eye contact when I tried.
She cheeked and pulled back and said “whoa! That was aggressive.” Then I had to awkwardly apologize. I felt like complete shit. She was going to Uber back home with me. But 5 mins after that happened she excused herself to go you the bathroom. I knew exactly what she was doing. She was calling her friends complaining about me and think of a bs reason to leave. I just went along with it and was like “sorry about earlier. Later”‘
Ladies you can’t have your #metoo cake and eat it too. Get used to guys being more hesitant, asking for permission, etc. Quit expecting us to read your minds.
Feminists say don’t touch without permission.
If you ask you kill the mood.
Obviously you have to read her mind.
Except then every interaction is theb about her leading (in fact or in your imagination) and suddenly you’re not a man. You’re just a coward... which she’ll figure out eventually and reject you in favor of the guy who is “sexist”
No... it is strange. It breaks the moment.
I think what is better is to ease into the kiss. It should not be a surprise. Ease into it slowly but steadily, so then the other people knows what you are doing and can respond: either leaning in to kiss you, not moving to receive your kiss, or backing away to not be kissed.
In either case you are informing the other person of your desires. So the risk for rejection is identical. Might as well go in for the kiss in the chance that it is wanted by the other. But once more: slow and steady. Should not be rushed. Should not be a surprise.
For me personally: if I went on a date right now and a girl just kissed me out of nowhere, unless I really liked her, I would be decently pissed. I think girls would likely feel grossed out (maybe?).
I wish i did, instead of sticking my tongue down his throat, not knowing what i was doing 😂 i was so embarrassed after.
Luckily he didn't know what he was doing either and were still together now and just laugh about it now. He said to me that i should have just asked but i didn't think it was very romantic to ask and 8 knew he was too shy to kiss me as was i. So i just want for it without thinking. Im also only 5ft so i literally had to jump him.
I vote to go for it. I think asking straight up would be awkward. The first time my guy kissed me, we lingered for a long time before saying goodbye. He kept getting closer and closer, and I knew he was going to go for it. It was adorably perfect. If I wasn't feeling it, I would've left a lot sooner lol.
I understand guy's hesitation though, and my guy admitted he's bad at reading signs. For the guys who are hesitant to just go in for a kiss, I think saying "I'd really like to kiss you right now" is a much better approach than asking.
A part of me feels like it would be nice to ask the girl. To seem like a gentleman, that you respect her. Which I feel being a gentleman is not so prevalent anymore. So to show that you are a rare breed goes in your favor. But if you don't want that type of image for yourself and your just looking for fuck around. Then just go for it without asking. I feel like you can just tell if the girl is down for a spontaneously kiss or not. If she reserved and quiet, you get that vibe that she's a good girl. Then it would be right to ask and show some respect. But if you get slut vibes, the train has left the station many times vibes. Shed honestly be down for anything.
I've never had to ask before... kissing usually mutually occurs naturally at least it has for me
But in current circumstances for some of you perhaps you should ask first especially if you think that you might be interested in public life you don't want to be accused 20 or 30 years later by one of your dates as having forced yourself on someone
If you both want to kiss, permission would never be necessary since you are both leaning in towards one another. Heck, my ex got up on her tippy toes with her arms around me our first time. She certainly did not ask nor did she need to. It was as natural as natural gets.
This is all situational and different for everyone. I think that if you are both spontaneous people, and a moment comes where it feels right and they seem interested, then maybe not. A lot of first kisses happen all of a sudden and in predicted. If you guys are still getting to know each other and you don’t know if they like you back, then maybe hold back. The whole asking to kiss them can be good at the end of a date where you guys are not in an intimate situation. Like if you’re saying goodbye. Then I think asking tO kiss the other is appropriate. But if it’s just in the moment and you see the other lean in or give an indicator, I think it’s ok not to. But asking never hurts.
Usually you can tell if there are signs, I’ve never asked but it could be cute asking, I had one that I could see she wasn’t receptive so I didn’t try or ask especially when she turned her head fast and went straight for a hug instead, that felt awkward and that was on a third date, turned out she just wanted a friendship instead
No, asking makes you look indecisive and unable to read signals rather than respectful. I wouldn't kiss on the first or second date anyway unless her body language makes it clear she wants it. The reason for that is I'm trying to get to know her and to make it clear that I'm respectful and not just trying to get in her pants.
ok I'm choosing
OTHER
why worry over something that both of you have already thought about as soon as the date was accepted... what would happen if as soon as I got there I took you gently into my arms and slowly kissed you and said "now that THAT'S out of the way we can a good time" or something similar would the date end or would it begin
Asking to kiss? Boy of boy, that's one effective way to turn off a girl and be labeled as weak. What you do is know what her body language says. If she is receptive, you go for it. If not, you don't go for it.
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