What are your red flags on online dating?

[Pinay_ako]

What ticks you off when meeting a potential partner online?
What do they say that turns you off about them and decide not to pursue a relationship?

[dragoblack]

Redirects are usually a red flag. Any mention of onlyfans, asking to sign up for a site, making no intentions on getting to know me, starting off a conversation with flirty names, the "i dont talk first", nothing on profile, hand under chin in pictures, pictures cover face, picture look obviously like they are all from overseas, bland descriptions with nothing to work with for conversation, vague replies & profile descriptions, profile photos in lingerie, profile photos with her ex-boyfriends, any mention of NFTs,

[blissinanarchy1]

Contact with anyone she slept with before, trying to be a social media influencer, any Onlyfans or anything similar, No goals, self entitlement, narcissism.

[jennifer_bloom]

Mockery, especially mocking my name or politics or religion or degree or beliefs.

[ChiTown33]

Well if you're talking exclusively online you're talking dating apps and I've pretty much thrown in the towel on that. The women on dating apps are so suspicious and negative that it just depresses me. First off I don't want to meet a woman who's first few words is about sex. And over half the women who post online lead with that. If that's all she has to offer a guy then we are not a match. 2. I'm not going to talk to a person that says the words "don't run game on me", "shoot your shot", or tell me, "don't like my profile send me a message". 3. If a woman says how "sweet" they are or "how tender their feelings are", is a very good sign they're actually the opposite. 4. HONESTY is a big thing with me. If you're lying to me before I even meet you then it's not going to get any better, so just forget it. 5. Women who post sexually suggestive pics or show excessive amounts of skin are a pass as well. I know what you're fishing for and it's not I. 6. Women who take over- the-head pics to minimize their belly and excentuate their cleavage, it's clear what you are doing, pass! 7. Women who put a minimum on income an education. I don't judge people by either. If you do we'll never work out, pass! 8. Lack of effort. The level of interest she shows translates to how much effort she put into a relationship. If dating you is pulling teeth. Then I'm just going to do us both a favor and end it. If she has concerns she can communicate that like an adult. Don't expect me to guess it. If that's the games she plays she can find another guy willing to play that game. I'll stop there before this list gets too long. Hopefully you get the idea.

Bottom line! be positive, be friendly, be real!

[MikeInHawaii]

7C, you forgot the minimum height.
I left a “like” emoticon because they don’t have a standing ovation GIF.

[Pinay_ako]

Yaaaaaaass!!! To all

[Bambalicious]

1.) Sexual: You’ve never even met but he’s already telling you how sexy you are. Being called beautiful is respectful but being called sexy by a stranger doesn’t feel right. He may even go beyond that and actually start talking sexually to you which is a major turn off (they’re a stranger).
2.) Communication: The way they talk, or lack of, will give off clues. I hate how people type words like “wht” or “fr”.
3.) Date/meet up: I haven’t been single for 12 years but this would still be in place…. I will not let you pick me up/ drop me off at my home. I will not get in your car and you won’t get in mine. I will only meet you in public places and will only do daytime meet ups. This may sound weird but it’s for safety reasons and if he’s not respectful about it then he’s not worth it. (Pick up/ drop off means they know your address. If I get in his car he’s in control and it can put me in a bad situation (how do I know someone isn’t hiding in the back). Driving him means that he could easily take me hostage. Meeting in public in the daytime keeps me safe as well.) This is still a stranger that I’m meeting for the first time. After a few dates I would feel more willing to let him drive and do a night date, he just has to earn it. I’ve watched too many crimes shows but I’d rather not chance it.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

Ones who seem to very strategically hide part of their body (the ass, a certain angle of their face is used every time to look thinner, always striking modeling poses that were obviously learned) cuz then I know you're either too insecure or you think you're some kind of diva or something.

Text me for a bit, disappear for a few days and come back. Like what was better about the other guy and why did he ghost you?

The bio says something like "looking for a reason to delete this app" but then she's wearing a crop top and a choker in every Pic. You're barely fooling yourself.

All your pictures are of you dressed to the nines or on the beach. That's a girl after your money.

If you tell a joke and she can't play along with it, keep it going or give an answer that doesn't keep the vibe going.

Basically any sign a woman gives off that in her mind, you're there for her entertainment.

If she isn't a stimulating conversationalist, and by that, I mean if you have to do all the talking, she's probably overanalyzing everything and you will constantly be in the dog house with her eventually.

She doesn't ask questions.

She asks questions but they're ones that indirectly tell her more about you than she wants you to think you're letting on.

She never talks about her personal life (she's not focused on you getting to know her truthfully)

Being overly defensive, either she's into you or she's a wiley bitch and maybe still into you, she definitely isn't sure.

By the time you meet up or by your second date, if she doesn't look at you as someone familiar. She's probably seeing a lot of other people who she may or may not be trying to have sex with.

NOW I'm not totally sure what I just wrote, I'm drunk af rn so I'll answer for this in the morning.

[MCheetah]

1. "Bisexual." If you want to be a lesbian, be a lesbian. Just stay TF away from normal straight men! So sick of this f*cking sh*t! Why do lesbians want to simp, abuse, and exploit men, despite admitting to be openly queer/gay? I f*cking hate seeing this above all else. Like being a lesbian is some badge of honor or something. 🌈

2. Transgender looking or mentions being an LGBTQ-etc ally out of the blue, for no reason. Virtue signaling BS.

3. "I'm a Feminist," mentioning their pronouns, or anything otherwise "woke." Any mentions of that is not only a No, but a Block, as well. Keep your man-hating sexist misery to yourself. Hell, any mention of politics, even from the right, is usually a pass from me.

4. Any signs of being a psycho or abusive. Such as "#TeamHeard" or looking at Alexandria Ocasio Cortez as a hero or role model. Another Block and Pass.

5. "Polyamorous" or "in an open relationship." You're a disgusting piece of trash. Block and Pass

6. Promotes lewd content of herself online, including and especially OnlyFans or pay apps. Any links to OF or their CashApp ID get Reported and Flagged by me. That's not allowed on most dating sites. I'll also ignore the ones linking to their Instagram.

Almost literally every dealbreaker in one package. Although being American or an artist is okay.

The complete dealbreaker, in one package. Probably trans, too.

Nasty cunt.

[DaveJord]

Ah, if you like them and they like you back but don't respond.

1. They won't commit to a first date with 2 to 3 days.

2. When been on dates, and they still stay active on the site and thier bubble stats green.

3. When they put any preconditions of dates or sex before even meeting you in person.

4. When they are more than 50 miles away from you when there profiles said they lived in the same town as you.

5. When they don't really ask or inquire about you in anyway, just give you short yes and no answers with no details.

6. No photos!!!

7. Want to get you off the platform immediately into whats app, hang outs, it Google chat.

8. When they lie or miss lead you in anyway and not telling before or on tge first date... from their age, real name, number of kids anything you feel you should of known.

8. When divorced and moved back into their parents house... at 45!!!

9. Profile says anything about Jesus.

10. When they have more than one pictures of their pets that they aren't in... like I ain't looking to date your dog.

[DaveJord]

I could go on, I've seen it all.

[Samantha_Kim]

When I see Jesus stuff on someone's profile this is a red flag to me so...🤷‍♀️

[DaveJord]

@Samantha_Kim yeah I am not super religious and I don't make Jesus a priority in my life. You see that a lot, " looking for some that makes Jesus a priority in his life" or " want someone to share the message of xheist with."

For me I mean, these types lack something and never works out for me. Maybe for women its different, but some the worst people I have ever met were self-proclaimed Jesus lovers.

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

I saw a few videos of people introducing themselves on matrimonial websites.

I would not be surprised if the girls who introduced themselves in the videos are not married yet.

Who would marry them? If they are saying-

1. They do not want to act as delivery machines. I say, literally nobody is saying that to girls. Girls themselves are degrading themselves. Giving birth is a natural role ordered by the nature itself.

There are many women here on this site who wanted to have babies. It is also natural to not want to have any, but please do not degrade yourself like this. This will turn any kind of suitor away for sure.

2. They wanted to expect everything from their husband, but expected the husband to not expect anything from them. It is senseless to me. A big NO from me for that girl.

3. Then some girls did not want pet names. I can understand, but her reasoning was that she was not an animal. I do jot understand it. Honey, Dear are just words and not pet names. She thought they were. A complete delusional person I would say. Not good for marriage.

If I encounter such a girl when looking for marriage, no matter anything, no matter how beautiful she is, no matter how much she earns, and no matter how good her background is, I would flat out reject her.

If she is not proud of being a woman, then I do not want her. You should be proud of herself first and then go on to others, I believe. And should be able to understand various different things that may or may not be obvious directly indirectly.

[Rosexøxø]

It’s all one big red flag. Your online screen should be red. There are more red pixels in your physical device screen. (Last part is made up). Point I’m emphasizing? Avoid online dating. If you’re too shy to speak to people in public places, you need to grow and spend more time with your ‘hobby’ and ‘tribe’ to be able to talk to anyone and be closer to finding someone who relates with you and your hobbies, or takes an interest in it. If you’re too poor to actually travel and go to some somewhat “cheap” places to gather and mingle, then you need to spend more time *saving/ earning* to be able to meet new people, enjoy yourself, and be able to treat someone you like- paying for some meals, whether you’re a guy or a girl.

I say this from humble experiences of the past and a true heart that cares enough to say: I wouldn’t want anyone to make the same mistakes I made.

hope this helps, xoxo

[Bob92220]

Let's say someone wants a relationship, but everyone he/she knows is in a relationship. So this person turns to online dating. What's a red flag about that? This way she/he can meet people who are supposedly wanting to be met.

[Smashingdoozy]

Small talk. Not making an effort to have a conversation. Immediately wanting to meet. Asking to meet at their/my place. Asking for number without any plans to meet up yet. Having a lot of "don't"s in their bio i. e. "don't message if [insert bullshit here]". Being overly sexual. Getting annoyed at me being cautious. Irritated by not me not replying immediately. Not respecting boundaries surrounding moving to a different platform.

Honestly probably many more but it's been a while since I've been on a dating app

[Finchie40]

Most girls I have talked to online aren’t who they say they are , it’s mostly some sick twisted individual pretending to be someone they aren’t so the only way I would meet a girl off the internet is if she proves to me that she is who she says she is , So many cat fishers online pretending to be someone else which to me is demented shit , people that need serious mental health help that need to be locked up in a psych ward , I prefer to meet a girl in public but that’s isn’t always guaranteed as well , s many fucked up people in this world that lie and cheat , I had more luck with married women over single girls , which makes me not really want a relationship period , this world has gone to hell in a hand basket

[Bob92220]

It seems to me there are a lot of unhinged people these days. They lash out at others because they are unable to cope with their own issues. But these people aren't limited to online dating sites.

[Lionman95]

For me a red flag is a person that wants to have an open relationship.
A person that is currently in therapy or going through a trauma.
A person that is not over their ex yet.
A person that is smoking or doing drugs and doesn´t know how much alcohol they can handle.
For me it´s also a redflag if they don´t seem to have read my messages like if she doesn´t care what I wrote to her.

[Pinay_ako]

This inspires me to write another question later. Thanks

[Lionman95]

You´re welcome. I followed you to not miss the question

[Pinay_ako]

🥰 Thank you!

[dynamicyandere]

🚩 Lying & Deceit
🚩 Loyalty Issues
🚩 Commitment Issues
🚩 Insecurity Issues
🚩 Anger Issues
🚩 Manipulation
🚩 Mind Games
🚩 Inattentive
🚩 Any Toxicity
🚩 Inconsistency (Words vs Actions)
🚩 Narcissism
🚩 Sexism
🚩 Disrespect

[dynamicyandere]

If they’re in the clear for all of those things, there’s still the chemistry and compatibility to assess. Sometimes people are just not a good match chemistry-wise and that doesn’t mean it’s a red flag or they’re a bad person—it just means you two aren’t compatible.

[Crafteroon]

Any inconsistencies in their profile or behavior.

Just like here, you are less likely to answer a question if they claim they wrote their age wrong, or have numerous misspells on their own question.

If they don't put up the effort on themselves, they are less likely to put the effort on you. Any lie you spot them making is a warning sign. Directly ask about anything that seems weird is a good choice, gives them less time to make shit up.

[Kaneki05]

Online meaning LDR? oh that's a easy one if they've never been LDR before, not saying it cannot work with someone hasn't been so. But there is much value to knowing how it becomes not been able to see each other IRL and people going into say they can handle it but cannot.

If your not meaning LDR just any regular thing I would find a red flag.

[love_conquers_lust]

Online dating itself is somewhat of a red flag for me. I hate it, so god dam much.

Plus, I’m far more comfortable and find it far more palatable to let it happen organically. I had more chemistry with a random girl on a friggin app than those stupid sites. I almost don’t care if it means dying alone. Rather do that than fucking online date.

[WeirdoFriendly]

At first, before we meet up and we're trying to make plans? I guess it depends on their personaly. Whether they're a stuck up bitch or a sweet young lady.
And yes, I have had a girl in the past swipe right on me just so she could tell me how ugly I am to her eyes and that even me breathing is taking up the air (and I quote) "perfect people like me need."

[AnnieNonymus]

That's not just a red flag. That's a whole circus. Imagine how miserable of a human she is to try to go out of her way to try to make others feel bad. Beauty is skin deep but ugliness goes straight to the bone. I normally try to ignore people like that but I might have made an exception for her.

[WeirdoFriendly]

Well, she is one of the many other reasons I stopped using dating apps.

[Bob92220]

Wow, that's brutal. Did you say something rude to her for her to make that comment? What other brutal things have happened?

[WeirdoFriendly]

No. In all honesty, I was asking how she was doing and then she told me I was ugly

[Bob92220]

There sure do seem to be a lot of people who are "unhinged" these days. They lash out at others because they can't handle their own stuff. Sorry you had to experience that.

[WeirdoFriendly]

It doesn't matter now. But I appreciate your sympathies. It just gives me a goal to strive away from that and never end up thinking I'm better than anyone else.

[MrPickles13]

Wooden responses as tho they aren't interested in the conversation. I guess as well then only wanting to talk online.

I dislike the amount. That just put contact me on this social account. Cause it doesn't seem right to add them.

Tmi about either sex or there interests in sex I don't feel like that's a thing to know so early. Spacer piercings as well they really creep me out.

A lack of manners is a key one.

[DenizLikesTennis]

My red flags in online dating are:

1. Short and dry response to their hobbies/questions

2. Uninteresting/boring page

3. She has more turn offs than the opposite. She dislikes a lot of things

4. Unhealthy habits

[Th3ft]

I would say it is all a red flag. I don’t see it working for most of my friends and I dont see people respecting anyone else in online dating. Not to mention ALLLLLLL of the spammers and hackers that hangout on online dating sites.

[RavVid]

I think values. If you don't have similar values you aren't going to see eye to eye. You might have mutually incredibly carnal desires but without a similar world view you aren't going far past hot sex.