Sometimes I just want to get to know a guy as friends because I am interested and not afraid to ask guys I am in casual terms with to get food or hangout. I try to keep it natural as if I ask one of my girlfriends to hang with me but I wonder how guys feel. Do guys automatically think the girl likes them?
Do guys think this is too bold or strong for a girl to be this straightforward?
They could mean it like a date, yes, but it depends: if it's someone you use to hang out with already (because he is in the same group of friends) or someone you talk with very often, meeting alone for a dinner could look like just a continuation of what you do already and not like a date.
However I can give you a story here: when I was 22 I enjoyed talking with a guy (26) online for a couple of days, and he knew I was not looking for any date or relationship because that was a topic in our conversations too. So, since I wanted to go in a specific restaurant again, and our convos were very fluent, lot of common interests and topics to discuss, I decided to invite him there. I specified a couple of times to not mean it like a date because I'm really not looking for any of that and he was chill about that.
At the end of the evening, after the restaurant, after cool convos, I was leaving him under his house with my car and he didn't leave, staying still and expecting something else from me, but without saying anything. I (stupid), not understanding, was puzzled so I spontaneously invited him to get out of the car, to unstuck the situation. He left in silence with a mildly pissed face, and our talks quite stopped afterwards.
So this teaches me: even if you specify and are very clear about your intentions, and, even if the conversations you have bring actual content to discuss so it's not just meeting for "knowing each other", still, the guy can expect something. I think in my case the guy was too fresh, he was too "unknown" still, so that might have contributed to make it look like a date.
Some guys will, but just be straight up when you set the dinner that it is just as friends. Make it a group thing to send a stronger message.
But beware. You're likely gonna have at least a few hidden incels or nice guys in there who won't be able to handle the idea of a platonic friendship. When these creeps reveal themselves, dump them as friends entirely and block all contact.
Just make sure you clarify what Hangout you're talking about because there's nothing like getting them mixed up and say sure okay and next thing you know you turn around and you're hanging out and they say what the hell is that what are you doing you asked me if I wanted to hang out with you so I pulled it out LOL that's really a tricky when you got to be careful I'm telling you I don't mind hanging out but going to get dinner at the same time I'm not sure about that one
It kinda depends. Usually I would think she's interested, but one time when I was like 21 a female friend asked me to go see a movie with her. I was infatuated with her roommate at the time and I missed all the signals she was sending me. I truly thought it was just hanging out as friends.
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It’s always fun to hang out with people who’s company you enjoy. And not every restaurant visit is a date. People get too hung up on ‘The Date Scene’ and forget that spending time with people can be fun without ulterior motives. If your worried the guy might misconstrue the invite though, maybe invite some of your friends, or ask him to invite some of his.
It definitely crosses the friendship barriers unless both have clearly been friends for some time and openly discuss their relationships and love interests. If you never discuss other guys with a particular guy and then suggest hanging out, he probably will suspect you like him.
No, it's not too strong for me.
I personally do, that if you approach me first, I'll let you approach me if I have mild interest in you. And if I'm free. What you do next after you approach me is what I use to define what is your interest related to me.
I personally would take this as a date invite if you said dinner just because that's rather traditional and if it was implied to be a one on one thing. However usually the "hangout" is a indicator of strictly being friends so if you really just want to get to know them as a friend than I'd make clear to him because it might feel like a date to him If you don't already know him that well.
I like to think of it as completely platonic unless stated otherwise, I’m not one of above average looks or qualities besides my personality and sense of humor (my opinion) which is why women would need to be straight to the point if they wanted a date or if we are just friends/acquaintances 😎
Guys usually don't look for female friends, so if you aren't out for a date. You shouldn't really be asking us out. You should just remain friendly, if there is anything worth building a friendship by it will happen over time.
I’d suspect the possibility if they weren’t in a relationship to my knowledge, but keep it subtle just in case it was just out of friendship.
And no, this is not too bold or strong. Both genders should feel equal in proposing a date of any kind.
I think that it would be easy for guys to make assumptions based on that scenario, but that it doesn’t necessarily imply anything.
A lot of guys would actually appreciate you being straightforward, as opposed to selling a lie.
Maybe she is interested in me or she just sees me as her pal. I don't know with women you can't tell.
Flattered. I enjoy stuff like that, even when it isn’t a romantic thing.
We do assume that. Men who have women as friends 99% of the time are attracted to them. So don't give the guy in the friend zone false hope!
Depends upon whether they expect them to pick up the tab for the whole thing - especially if he doesn't get anything for it.
I have been asked that zero times so I would feel like they’re not serious
A way to a guys heart is through his stomach
It would be a surprise (I'm always the asker). I'd probably say yes just out of shock
I can tell you without a doubt that the majority of men never get asked by a female to do those things
That depends how she asked and where she was taking me.
Id be stoked, and especially if I was into her.
Intrigued because it’s rarely ever done
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