If you had to pick, would you rather date someone significantly older or younger (assuming they're legal)? Why is that?

[Anonymous]

Significantly Older

Significantly Younger (but legal)

Just show results

[Pinay_ako]

I don’t want to date someone over 5 years younger than me. Or 15 years older than me. I want to spend quality time with him as we both get old together, not me wiping his ass/changing his diaper or him taking me to a nursing home. 😑 NO

[MCheetah]

Younger, for obvious reasons.

But ideally, I'd want a woman between 23 and 30. The oldest I'd be comfortable with is 39 (unless she looked MUCH younger, like 25-29), and the youngest I'd be comfortable with, is 21.

I've pretty much always just wanted a woman in her mid to late 20s; post college and a little more mature and past her "experimental/slut" phase, but hasn't hit The Wall yet.

[Finchie40]

I don’t really hold age as a deciding factor , As long as her and I have great chemistry and connection and attraction to each other that’s all that matters to me , she can be older , younger , my age etc. It doesn’t matter as long as her and I have a great connection

[letuswaltzforthedead]

If I was older, I would rather date someone a few years younger I don't know about dating someone "significantly younger" since that would imply that I'm much older and still single.

[Asker]

Haha. But, theoretically, if you were in your 30s or 40s and sill single would you date someone significantly younger?

Also, why do you prefer younger to older?

[letuswaltzforthedead]

Yeah, I think I would always prefer to date someone in their mid-20s or younger. It feels like it would give me more time to bond with that person even if it isn't actually true. Plus, as long as they're not immature (for their age) and reasonably intelligent, it would be fun to be with someone who's still "new to the world" and more energetic.

[letuswaltzforthedead]

I'm also planning to freeze some of my eggs and take precautions like those so biological isn't as big of an issue for me and I hope by 40, it won't be as well.

[Asker]

Why exactly do you think being with someone much younger could/would give you more time to bond with them?

[letuswaltzforthedead]

I'm honestly not sure since it's just a feeling that it gives me, not really logical. I know that a 20 year old has more or less the same chance of dying tomorrow as a 60 year old despite the difference in age, plus the fact younger people are more likely to be doing dumb dangerous things in the first place but the feeling is still there.

[Asker]

Yes, being with someone much younger makes it a lot more likely you'll outlive them

Also, for what it's worth, I'm married to a guy 15 years younger and it's the best relationship I've ever had. At first I was super hesitant because I was worried the age gap would be a major problem. However, it's not a problem at all (especially since he's very mature and consequently our maturity levels are compatible) If anything his age is a plus. He's more adventurous and energetic (and can match my energy much better than men my age), he has less relationship baggage (and is more optimistic about our relationship), he's more open minded/supportive of my career/not intimidated by my professional success, he makes me feel younger (in all the best ways), it's incredibly flattering he finds me super attractive he's got a smoking hot muscular body, his sex drive is compatible with mine (as opposed to men my age who have lower sex drives from my experience), and (of course) he gets harder and recovers faster.

[letuswaltzforthedead]

That honestly sounds like a very lovely relationship, I hope you both have many years together ahead of you :)
I didn't think of many of those benefits but those definitely sounds like positives, I appreciate you telling me your story. Have you gotten any remarks from other people? or are the majority of those you know indifferent?

[Asker]

That actually is a drawback. We have gotten quite a bit of judgement from our age gap. It was a lot worse at first though. At the beginning our families both very much disapproved. They didn't disown us, but they certainly were unsupportive. My family became super worried that my judgement was being tarnished by a mid life crisis. They told me things like he was just using me as a fetish and he'd eventually get bored and leave me for a younger woman. They said he might be a gold digger (even though he never asked me for money and even refused when I offered to give him some) They said the relationship couldn't work out with such a big age gap. His family (particularly his parents) were worried I was just some old floosy who was going to screw up his life and future. His family (particularly his parents) were particularly worried that if he stayed with me he wouldn't be able to have kids (and his parents really wanted grandkids from him). They said things like “Maybe you'd be happier with someone who for certain has all of her eggs,” or, “Perhaps, you want someone who isn’t on a timeline of starting a family.”

All these things brought a lot of worry and insecurity out of me. However, my husband (then boyfriend) is an amazing man who stuck by me, supported me, and helped me feel better/get over all those insecurities.
For a good while the family judgement was really rough. However, after a (fairly long) while the family came to see how much we cared about each other and were good for each other. They all eventually (but slowly) accepted (and eventually even supported) our relationship. His parents still remained pretty cold towards me, but once I got pregnant (with twins) their attitude completely changed over night (although it took me a while to stop feeling bitter towards them).

[Asker]

Even though we don't have to worry about family judgement we still get judgement from people in general. Getting rude or ignorant comments about the age gap isn't uncommon (as well as weirded out looks). Interestingly enough, the biggest judgement seems to come from women my age (probably because they're jealous they can't snag a sexy younger guy. haha). It was hard for a while, but we've gotten to the point where it doesn't bother us anymore. We just smile and hold hands. However, if someone is particularly judge-y (especially a woman around my age) I'll tell my man to flex his bulging muscles while I squeeze them. Then I'll squeeze his ass, pull him as close as possible, and give him a long, huge, passionate, sexy kiss just so they can all see. That's loads of fun. haha

[letuswaltzforthedead]

Lolol Rolling other people sounds fin, ay least its something to laugh about together 😆
Its a share that both of you guys' parents didn't really think the relationship was valid at first. It sounds like the relationship between you guys is much better now, hopefully they won't be so quick to judge next time something happens lol. Anyways, thank you a lot for talking about this 😊

[Asker]

The relationship between us has always been great. The difficult part was figuring out how to work with all the judgement coming from everyone outside of us.

Our families are very supportive of our relationship now. Others, not always. However, we can work with that. Also, like I said, giving my man a big long sexy smooch in front of super judge-y people is often really fun. Haha

Happy to talk about it. If you've got any other questions about anything don't hesitate to ask!

[Avicenna]

At my age, significantly younger is better. I'm also around young adults most of the time anyway.

[bayoubob]

Absolutely no one points out the fact of that hottie with that old man in the pic is a Gold Digger. No one points out the old man wants that hottie tail because he has money. If I were a super hottie, let's face it, she's the equivalent in hotness to what straight women like in a Ryan Gosling. So, why the question?

[TheSpaceGnome]

If forced between one or the other, younger.
Significantly older women do not share any of my hobbies except maybe drawing in a tiny percentage of them, but many younger ones are gamers who like science, drawing, cartoons/anime, science fiction, fantasy, etc.
I Prefer someone close to my age though. Too young or too old feels weird.

[Shayyyy1]

Older so i could get back at my dad and see what it like. old guys aren't bad. My dad lied and is 15 years younger than my mom total asshole for that, knocked my mom up when he was 25 total shit head. perfect go fuck yourself plan.

[Apple1996]

Definitely younger since if it's legal like 18-early 20s they will probably be closer to my age then the older person that might be 15-20 years older then me and I just wouldn't be able to relate to them.

[FilmGuy93]

Younger. I have seen the same mind-blowingly immature shit from people much older than I am, as I have from people younger than I am. At least the young people have an excuse.

[Guardian45]

I think we dated the same women! 😂🤣👍

[TheUniqueOne96]

Older, because I feel like they'd be more caring and nurturing.

I don't like the idea of dating going significantly younger for some reason, like I don't mind a few years, but not for me.

[AviatorTom]

If I had to pick, younger. At my age, a woman significantly older might not be able to keep up with me. A younger woman might do me in, but what a way to go.

[lilyanony1]

I'm 31 I don't think I can handle a young man. So an older one might just want food and to sleep.. I'll sort my self out!

[Coden7]

I prefer someone more mature. They can be younger, if they hold themselves more mature. Most of the women I have found attractive have usually been a couple years older than me. But there have been exceptions from time to time.

[TroyDT2]

I normally do not go younger, but an 18 year old might conceivably be acceptable if she is mature. An 80-year-old? Not likely to be able to keep up with my active lifestyle or share my interests or even survive till I reach 40.

[bigmatt98]

People my own age annoy me to death. So younger I feel like I would truly go insane I got an old soul and I’ve always preferred woman older then me.

[exitseven]

I am over 50 and if I dated someone older I would have to have sex in a nursing home.

[FreyaRed]

Perfect 90/60/90 man. 90 years old, 60 days to live and 90 billion bucks heavy.

[genericname85]

Younger. Cause i can't have kids with a girl significantly older. Like I'm not "really"planning on having kids but would be nice to have that option on the table.

[Summeroflove]

It depends. They have to be between legal age and child bearing years

[Jamie05rhs]

Younger, of course. I can't date someone my mom's age. That would be weird.

[Berethor]

You aware that men tend to woman's value and fertility above all else? so yea younger.

[misogynistic_pig]

I only like younger women, my girlfriend is 16 years old.

[XXblack88]

Probably younger. With my dad being 55 dating someone significantly older then me would make me feel like I was dating my dad.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

I once dated a lass almost my mum’s age, like a year younger.

[XXblack88]

@HippieVeganJewslim if your ok with it that's fine. But I feel weird dating someone old enough to be my dad. Now most of my friends are either 2 to 4 years younger then me or they're 5+ years older then me. So while I have no problem hanging out with people my dads age I don't want to date/ be married to someone my dads age.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

I don’t believe in age, as people can look old and be young or vice versa. Jesse Tuck looked 17 while being 104.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

He told Winnie, 10, to drink from a magic spring when she’s 17, so she could look the same forever and ever.

[XXblack88]

@HippieVeganJewslim well I'm clueless on who that is. Ik people aged differently. I still don't want to date/ marrie someone my dad's age.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

It’s in a book by Natalie Babbitt, Tuck Everlasting. A person aged 66 who exercises, eats fruits, and gets sunshine can look way younger than a person aged 39 who smokes 40 fags a day and noshes junk food. They can marry although still be old enough to be parent and offspring.