I want to date this guy but there's another guy in the picture?

[Anonymous]

Ok so this other guy (I'll call him Jake) has liked me for almost 5 years straight and I've liked him too, like a lot, and I kinda implied that I wanted to date him in the future. But anyways, I later found out that I didn't want to date him due to moral and religious difference, the main one being that he is homophobic and transphobic and I am bisexual and genderfluid. But I'm afraid to tell him because I still have to go to the same church as him ( my parents make me) and I'm afraid that he's going to tell people and my parents will find out that I'm party of the LGBTQ+ community. Anyways it would ask not be a problem if I didn't like this other guy ( I'll call him ducky) ducky is just absolutely perfect for me, and he likes me too, like, a lot. And I really like him too. I want to date him so bad, but I can't until I figure this out. What do I do? I can't just tell Jake that I like someone else and move on with it, it'll break his heart and I'll have to see him every Sunday and sometimes Wednesdays. Uggghhhh 😩😩😩 I really need help, please.

[slatyb]

Yes, you can just tell him. His feelings aren't your responsibility. But why do you have to tell him? Is her badgering you for a date? Then just say "Sorry, but I don't think it would work." That's ALL. He's not entitled to an explanation.

[Asker]

Thank you this was the most helpful response I've gotten

[slatyb]

We raise children to be considerate, particularly girls, but rarely teach them to have boundaries.

If a man expresses interest, your only obligation is to respond truthfully and politely. In responding there are only "yes" and "no". You don't need an excuse, but you are free to make one up, whether true or not, whatever you think will get them to go away quietly. "Sorry, I'm already seeing someone" is fine, even if the only person you are seeing is your mother.

Here's a song for you: https://youtu.be/gvY3SSQ3HR0

[Krillind]

Just tell him you don't want to date anymore. I'm sure he'll find someone better anyway so just leave it at that.

[Asker]

You're right yeah

[Guy13]

You are stuck and no time to decide... what's your plan?

[Asker]

Bro I don't have one

[Avicenna]

You need to find a way to reject him

[Asker]

Yes but what do I say?

[Avicenna]

Just tell him you want to date another guy

[Asker]

That causes problems tho, of my parents find out they'll barrage me with questions why, and who and I'm not ready to tell them yet,

[RobT312]

Go on a date with each of them and see who u like better

[Anonymous]

Never date a bigot, they are simply not worth it.

[Asker]

Yeah but what do I do?

[AsaKyo]

Wtf lmao

[Asker]

I don't know man, I got too much rizz

[Anonymous]

Date both...

[Asker]

I can't, they aren't polyamorous

[Opinion Owner]

Both guys come at church?

[Asker]

No, but I'm not going to be a two timing cheater, bro what?