I am having lunch tomorrow with a guy I like it’s our 2nd meeting, how to open the topic and tell him how I feel?

[Anonymous]

I told him in messages that I liked our 1st meeting and him too as a person he said I’m glad to hear that. Since it was only our 1st meeting I think it went smoothly and we got to know each other (since we meet in person we firstly met online). During our 1st meeting we talked about basic things as jobs etc he showed me his area where he lives we ate lunch together. At the end of our 1st meeting he asked if we can meet again.
So tomorrow I don’t know how to bring the topic without sounding desperate 🥺
Do men like it when a women simply shows her true intentions? We are both into our 30s I’m 31 he is 37 so I don’t want to waste our life and time with games and unnecessary struggles

[OlderAndWiser]

@coachTanthony has it right. At this point, you lke what you see, but realize that there is MUCH, MUCH more for you to learn before you decide whether he is The One. Confessing feelings to him now will only make you look desperate and clingy, and that is NEVER a good look!

So instead of a confession, have questions to ask him.

"Ten years ago, what did you think you would be doing now? Has life developed the way you expected?"

"How often do you spend time with your family?"

"Do you regret not having your own family at age 37? Do you get annoying comments from friends and family about that?"

"If you won the lottery today, what would you do with the rest of your life?"

You didn't mention whether either of you has previously been married. If he is divorced, you can ask him "Do you think you're a better person now because of what you learned when you were married and going through a dvorce?"

But don't ask these questons like you're conducting a job interview. Let the conversation flow freely and pull out ONE of these questions only if there is a lull in the conversation.

[spartan55]

Best advice 👍

[Asker]

Hi thank you so much for your comment. I agree with you and that’s how I am I haven’t really told him exactly how I feel all I did was simply message him that I liked him as a person in person I felt good being with him. And I though I deserved to say it because we went to so any places and he always insisted paying. I don't know how it will go but he wants to go out everywhere with me even tomorrow he booked for us to go and see the phantom of opera it went like 800$ I asked him to give me his Zelle or PayPal so I pay my share he said no way it’s on him.
Today was our 2nd meeting and when talking to each other he said don’t worry being shy we have only met 2x twice. And it’s true I agree why the rush we only met twice so that clicked to me. Also I’m
Going away for 3-4 months for my graduate school so I’m continuing my things anyways. We talked that we will still talk during that time until I’m back.
He said until you leave let’s go to many places
That’s all it’s been so far
When we are together we talk random stuff and we laugh a lot. But he is very careful of what he says. It’s like IF he wants to make sure when he says- I like you - he means it. So far he haven’t expressed any of that beside that- he enjoyed spending time with me -

I agree with you 100%
Thank you ♥️

[OlderAndWiser]

All of this sounds very encouraging. Good luck!

[Summeroflove]

You should be honest and show your intentions. Don’t be disingenuous. If someone’s into you. Showing attraction is a good thing.

When it’s not good is if someone’s not into you and someone won’t leave them alone or someone with no personal boundaries.


Most people don’t like games unless they’re also a person who likes games. Many times when someone starts playing games. The other person looses intrest and they act all confused wondering why someone used to seem interested but isn’t anymore

[Adaeva]

If you were beautiful so that he was more into you than you are into him and if he believed you are the best that he could ever do, you could express your feeling and he would jump at the opportunity to marry you. However, that is not the case. You meet guys like that and you don't want them and you will not date them because you know you can do better.

Unlike you and other women, guys are not choosy about who the date but they are very selective about who they marry. Therefore, since you believe you are doing well but, almost certainly, he doesn't believe he is doing well, it will not help if, early on, you leave him with the impression that he can do better. Therefore, you need to cool it until after he has invested so time dating you. Then you can express your feeling and maybe there is a 20% chance that he will marry you.

[Asker]

I don't know if you are really 14 but your comment truly hit my heart I agree 🥺💜

[Asker]

I haven’t let him know that much actually I’m continuing my doctorate away for a semester so we’ll we can See what Happens

[Adaeva]

You are probably doing right. However, it is very difficult for educated women in their 30s when the high caliber men in their 30s they want and probably deserve, are chasing after women in their 20s.

[Adaeva]

Thank you for the MHO.

[CrazyGirl2]

You’re going out with him, I think he understands that you like him. As far as telling him anything else about how you feel… Sure go for it, if you wanna scare him off, that’s a great idea. However, if you do like him and want the relationship to actually go anywhere, maybe wait until you have been dating more than a month!

[spartan55]

Crazygirl ain't talkin crazy here...😁

[CrazyGirl2]

@spartan55 Thanks 😊

[coachTanthony]

Just relax and have a good time. Have a couple of good compatibility questions ready to go. Remember you still need to vet this person to make sure you're both aligned. A good question would be where do you see yourself in five years. If you want a family and he wants to tour with KIZZ then needless to say you're not a match. Just keep these things in mind.

[Vikkrram]

If you think he is into you then of course you can bring the topic that how you feels for him. Why can't you bring that topic don't listen to that shit that " A guy would only makes the first moove ".

[ZenJen444]

You're doing too much and sound desperate. I'm sure he sees that and is not interested nor invested in you but will use you until is dream girl comes along

[Asker]

Even though I’m speaking my mind here I’m honestly trying not to show as much with him at all.. but I think whatever happens tbh I don’t want to give anything

[Asker]

I don’t want to worry anymore * not give lol

[AmeerX]

Don't bring marriage even if you want that. He will think you are desperate. And withhold sex too

[Iron_Man]

It’s to early for that act interested set up another date eventually soon you can tell him