My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. Im still in school and I dont have class everyday so i have much more free time than him. He has a stressful job, works 5 days a week, ends 5-6pm, sometimes 7 pm. So we only hang out 1-2 times during the weekdays after his work. its usually just grabbing dinner and go home. My boyfriend recently got into basketball and he's been going quite often, 3-4 times a week. But with how busy his work has been. He has been going every sat with his friends. I migt be overthinking. Even though he once told me to feel free and join him but I can't find myself joining because I feel like im interfering his alone happy time. This is because I might not have been the perfect girlfriend. Sometimes I might be unconsciously controlling and he would feel like he doesn't get to do things his way or what he likes, but we have addressed this and im trying to change. So thats why I feel like if I went, and if we fought or he suddenly gets annoyed of me, then it will be like I have taken away his comfort zone.
I also feel like his hobby is becoming more important than me. Since we barely see each other on weekdays, I look forward to spending weekends with him. I don't know why but everytime im about to ask him to hangout with me, he would be the first to mention that he's hanging out with his basketball friends on sat. (He usually wakes up late and plays basketball for like 4-5 hours, and eat dinner with his friends after, so there's no more time with me on those days). Then i just couldnt find myself asking him to hang out more cos i want him to rest or spend time with his family on Sunday. It might be my fault I didn't have a specific plan Or tell him to hang out on this or that day. But am I expecting too much for him to put me first? To be the one who says that we should hangout! To plan a whole day spending time with me because now its like hanging out with me 3 hours a week is enough. I know Should he be more active in asking me out?
