I really like a guy I’m dating but he’s going through a lot of problems in his personal life and is distancing himself… what can I do to help him?

[Anonymous]

[Screenwriter]

If he's distancing himself, respect that move on his part and leave him alone. He feels this is what he needs to do to heal himself.

There is absolutely NOTHING YOU CAN DO. You cannot help him or rescue him, unless. he ALLOWS you to do some things for him, such as listen to him talk over a few issues.

But you also CANNOT BE HIS THERAPIST. That is not your job. He needs to get that help from a professional. You might suggest that to him if he hasn't already done this. But otherwise, keep your distance.

If this distancing goes on too long, you may have to reconsider this relationship. He may not be ready to have one. You could talk THIS over with him because it relates to you two.

If he seems at all unsure, I believe it's time for you to bow out. This hurts, but better to know this early on so he can do HIS work and you can find someone who is available to you, now.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Give him the space he needs. And be there for him when he is ready.

[ProbablyClueless]

I learned this with the last lady I was quasi-dating. If the person has shit in their life and they have decided that they need to push you away for whatever reason, all you can do is love them from a distance.

DON'T FIGHT THEM ON IT. They'll just dig their heels in and push you away harder.

If they start pushing you away, just go. I know it sucks, and I know that their decision probably doesn't make any sense. They most likely know that. Challenging them on their decision will go over like a shart in church.

[Summeroflove]

Respect his space if he needs it. But genuinely show him your compassionate and nurturing side. Maybe he doesn’t want to talk. Maybe just be held for a time. It’s okay.

[DoggyDude]

Just be understanding. Let him know your there without imposing yourself. He will soon be back to you.

Regarding helping. The best help a partner can give is by showing understanding of the person and their needs and also providing gentle challenge when they diviate from whom you know them to be spiritually.

So, be there, listen, don't impose yourself, make him feel able to open up when he's ready.

[Natasha2024]

I've been in a similar position where the guy u was dating was facing some issues and he would distance himself only to find out he's been cheating. My opinion in this case is just to wait and see if he does open up byt if he doesn't, its likely because he doesn't want your help and he won't consider it. Just keep checking thw signs and don't act too desperate. If a guy values you enough he won't have to distance himself and he should want to have you by his side.

[Chelsdope0]

So true! Just experienced this.

[Natasha2024]

The worst feeling ever but we move!!

[Chelsdope0]

O man yes…. I see you’re 18. Just a heads up… men don’t ever grow up..

[Natasha2024]

Thanks!!

[magiusX26]

just be supportive and patient. you can not control or force another's way to process (deal) with emotions. same as when you are dealing with some big thing/s, people can not dictate how or when you get through that/those thing/s. it is an internal process.

[JacobJordan]

Be there for him even though he is distancing. Man has probably been in this situation before and the woman threw it in his face later so if you are there for him don't you dare ever use his vulnerability as a weapon

[Coolcow245]

First you need to love bomb him, then take away your attention and become cold. When he starts to chase you, make him buy u a Gucci bag. Message me and give me the bag.

[myacaii]

On top of supporting him, acts of service. Those can be done even if he distances himself and I’m sure he’d appreciate your efforts

[Paris13]

If It's True He Says, Just Let Him Know You are Here for Him. xxoo

[Amara_09]

Space. Give him space , that’s the best way to help a guy.

[hunterzoloman6555]

Let him come to you as a guy we don't like talking about feelings or emotion cause society has ingrained into our brains that we are suppose to be the strong one the one that shoulders all without question don't rush him let him come to u

[sheikalana]

Be supportive. Give him space but check on him regularly.

[DARKCLOUD1945X]

You are not going to fix him. Give him a lot of space he will let you know when he is ever ready.

[Charliefretz329]

Be supportive, be there for him. It won’t be the first time in your future lives that he needs a friend.

[linka_pat307]

Don't be forcey like getting him to talk about his problem but just give help where he asks

[Surely]

The best thing you could do or be. Show him that you are a friend and be there for him. But, don’t crowd or smother him.

[pickles77]

Help him process what he’s going through and stay by his side. He will appreciate it even if he wants to isolate himself.

[Staximus]

You can do what he's doing, distance yourself from him.

[noohair]

The only person that you can fix is yourself. I created my problems so I had to fix them.

[Nice222]

Just let him work through his problems and just let him know you are willing to help as much as you can. And just be there to listen to him.

[ImHere22]

Give him a blowjob

[spartan55]

Be 'hands off' supportive.