Would you give a long distance relationship a try?

[Anonymous]

I got out of a relationship 2 months ago and decided to take a break from dating. One of my friends said she “didn’t want me to give up” so she shared my photo with one of her friends back in her home country which is 4,300 miles away. Her friend thought I was attractive and wanted me to message her.

I decided to give it a shot and we’ve been messaging on WhatsApp for a week. She’s a nice person but we have to use a translator to talk to each other which is kind of annoying. I tried to video call her, but she’s scared to do so because she shares a room with her 2 nephews and the house is loud at all times. She’s also a workaholic and works 3 jobs. Despite her busy schedule, she makes more time and effort to message me throughout the day than my ex did and even apologizes when she’s slow to reply.

Despite how attractive she is and the nice things she says through translated messages, I’m not convinced that this could work logistically. If you’ve ever been in a long distance relationship, did it work out?

[Rosexøxø]

Yes I did. Was very hard. I should mention long distance shouldn’t be done LONG term. They should have moving in mind as youngsters who date have marriage in mind. Marriage is an option to them.

C’est la vie. But moving is necessity and they can’t stay apart forever.

If they do their will, will be put to the test, as well as their feelings for each other. I met my husband through LDR and he’s from another country… not even driving distance away. We are both on the same page. Fully committed. I ironically cheated (unintentionally) and he forgave me. We’re stronger than ever. Have eyes for no one else, and give no room for such things. We still very much want to be together and he’s willing to move to my area and work so we can both save up for a better place.

I didn’t meet him from the fish net of dating sites. I met him from a game. It was a place to chat more and not rush into nxdes and all. The intentions I’d say were okay and we were lucky.

[runitupkai]

I've had plenty of long distance relationships. They were amazing and good, it made me happy because most of the guys there liked someone else, didn't see the signs, or alr in a relationship. My most recent online relationship was ok even though I am taking a break from e dating because I feel like you can experience so much more when your relationship is in person. I've got my eye on someone right now as we speak. But if you want to get into a relationship online then go for it!

[Purpleronnie]

Well I did try this , and I considered myself deeply and madly in love with this girl and we made it work for about 20 months. It was crazy hard on us , we were both busy career and life wise and still made massive effort to spend time together taking turns to make the commute or meeting in between for romantic rendezvous but what started as temporary parting became permanent for her and I chose not to follow and change my life. It absolutely broke my heart in a way that I have no words to describe, a pain that thankfully I have never experience since. Had I the chance of a do over I’d make the same decision and for certain I know that for me LDR don’t work.

[Rosexøxø]

Wow that was awful to read. Maybe not enough context or emotion shared but awful in the sense you seem fine. Hope she moved on well clearly she had the drop off done to her and she wanted it with all she had. You just had to decide to say no.

Maybe you loved and chose the healthy option and saw it not for you but to commit you really did take some of her time too and made her believe it could work. Maybe you were just young, but luckily you didn’t do that again.

If you mean well glad it worked out. If not… that’s just awful. Such a plot twist too. I thought with the time spent it’d be a happy thing. :\

[Purpleronnie]

I was in my 20’s , so no not young. It was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made for our relationship to end. When your heart wants but head disagrees. Trying to make the long distance relationship work for me was based on her returning to me and where she “choose” to stay was based on purely what she wanted , she had other choices, including coming back to me. Me choosing to stay was a decision based on my family , my friends , my career , my home etc in complete conflict with my feelings for her but she was also making the same decision on her side by choosing not to come back to me.

The decision I made haunted me for quite some time after but I knew it was right and still do. I didn’t keep in contact with her , I couldn’t bare it , I felt I had to rip every part of her from my life to make it hurt less so I drove to her with all her belongings and then removed every other piece of us from my life and said goodbye. My life and ll that I had achieved couldn’t have been moved to her it wasn’t a sacrifice I could ever make for love. We all have to put ourselves first and this was me betting on me and not gambling it on love

[BonzoInBitburg]

Long distance is hard enough if you speak the same language but you never know if you don't try. Try to learn the culture and a bit of the language. You can always bond over food so learn some of the food in her culture. But don't enter a long distance relationship without planning on visiting her. It's going to be different in person than over chat. Hopefully it's better in person but you never know

[MsProsperity]

All relationships can work out, it depends on the effort you’re willing to put to make it work. So if y’all like each other, give her a chance. Meet her and see how it goes. If y’all get into a relationship you will have a schedule of when you’ll meet, maybe twice a month. Get out of your comfort zone

[menina]

I thought that I would get into a long distance relationship but it didn't work out. However, I would still give it another try.

That being said, I believe that a long distance relationship can work, but it takes patience and a lot of effort and sacrifices. It won't be easy.

If you feel that LDR's are not for you, then maybe you should say that to the girl you've been talking to. That way, you won't make her waste her time and you won't hurt her feelings.

[Simslover92]

I am advocate for long distance relationships that are less than 1,000 miles away. I don't think it's going to work tbh. I'm in a long distance relationship but we're only 2 hours away. I don't think I could do more than that. Some ldr that are more than 4000 miles can work and have been successful but it's few and far.

[CriticalCatDad123]

Am of the long distance relationships I've been in ended because she cheated. I cried so hard once I started laughing. That's the day I think everything changed within me

[slatyb]

Only if there were plans to meet reasonably soon, and then possibly for one of us to relocate.

[Miristheiss]

Nope. If they move away then that is a break up.

[DextroShade]

Long-distance relationships are a waste of time unless you are a passport bro planning to go over there.

[Nikki1989]

What would be the point. I can walk out the door and meet a new guy in 5 minutes.

[In_Trance]

Nope

[Asker]

These locations are oddly accurate. You stalking me? Lol

[Iron_Man]

I’ve done that a long time ago. I was very successful.

[dragoblack]

My personal experience... it all feels like text roleplay and completely fake.

[DishLady]

Maybe. Depends on the quality of the fellow.

[rosemilk]

no. waste of time.

[mono_gram]

Ideally no, but I will have to pretty soon.

[Pinay_ako]

Yes.

[strateguy632]

no because can't even kiss.

[ToriitheGoblin]

I did, and now we live together

[sheikalana]

Not at all. That sounds childish.

[Hellur991]

I don't believe in that

[noohair]

Been there. one worked one did not.