Pressures Of Being In Your 20's

[HeBrokeMyHeart]

So lately I’ve had this tremendous amount of pressure put upon myself for making the right choices for my future, and hell I’m sure we’ve all been there. Having to decide what we want to do for the next 40 years, how we’re going to get there; is it all the right choice? And heck it’s not like someone is forcing me to make these decisions right here and now, except my own stubbornness to succeed in life. I see people my age all the time, who are making something of they’re lives as if the road they have laid out for themselves is the red carpet! People starting families, buying houses, getting married and succeeding in their professions. It’s as if I’m back in my year 2 race and I’m last because I’m skipping through enjoying the scenery!

But after nearly 3 days of antagonising myself, applying for relentless jobs in Management and question what the fuck I actually want to do in life I’ve come to the decision, this is no race, these people who seem to have everything together actually don’t. In reality I’m only 20 years old …. 21 in 2 months, eek! And I have this whole massive journey ahead of me, I don’t have to have it all planned out and prepared because things happen, things change and you grow as a person – Hell when I was 8 I wanted to be lawyer, and then a fashion designer – Oh and lets not forget my stage of wanting to become a pop star. Truth be told were in a generation were people now go through up to 5 different job roles in their lives, do I think I will want to become an account for the rest of my life? No thank you. But at this moment in time I enjoy it, it’s something I know how to do, which also pays a decent amount of money for me to live.

You see, when were little our dreams are so big we don’t see any hurdles we have to jump, we don’t think about what it will cost us to get there, we just dream big and won’t let anyone tell us otherwise and I miss that, I miss thinking that if I want to do something that’s what I’ll do. Now I can’t even pin point five things I want to do, well I lie, I would love to make a difference – how I don’t know, but something I truly believe in like women’s rights or volunteering in poor countries – I also thought about saving lives and becoming a doctor but well I hate needles and veins, so that kind of counts me out. The problem is who knows if I will feel the same way in the next few years, what if I change my mind?

Really all I’m trying to say is, if you feel like you should have your life together in your early 20′s – don’t! We still have a long old process to get to where we want in life, so in the meantime tinker with shit, explore your options, travel and embrace the fact you can do whatever the hell you want why you don’t have very much responsibilities. The day will come when things just click in place.

[ManOnFire]

It's amazing how life hurts differently for us all. You are expected to do all the things you stated, by friends, family, or society. It's a pressure that's hard for us, it really is. And when you do achieve those things - or in a more timely fashion as far as society is concerned - you're a loser or whatever. Most people go down the beaten path because they're afraid of being their own person.

And then on the flip side, it's interesting to see how there are others out there who are in the same age range and feel bad about themselves because they haven't even accomplished some of the most basic things about being an adult that the rest of us have! I've heard about adults in their 20s who have NEVER had a job, never had a car, never had a bank account, or ever had a lover. They have even less experience in life than people their own ages and younger. Society REALLY laughs at the ones like this, but I feel bad for them, because they obviously didn't have what they needed to get to the level the rest of us could get to.

[SakuraCherryBlossoms]

Do you really think the people who haven't done much in their twenties should be laughed at? It is a shame they didn't experience much, but they also don't have to experience everything they have because of debt. There are tons of people in their 20s who are in thousands of debt over cellphones. All because of the status they bring... I think society should laugh at those kinds of people instead.

[SakuraCherryBlossoms]

*losing everything.

[ManOnFire]

@SakuraCherryBlossoms Oh no I certainly don't think they should be laughed at. I think it's stupid that society expects so much from us. I mean, we're still young and still trying to get there. I agree, the people who should be laughed at are the ones who've abused their privelages and advantages.

[SakuraCherryBlossoms]

Yeah... but isn't it really having a fake privilege, if you don't really own the things you have and you just really own the debt?

[ManOnFire]

@SakuraCherryBlossoms Well, yes, that TOO is a very awesome point. Something I never thought about myself. That is resoundingly true. Yeah, they really just own debt and bondage, and whatever job they have and money they make is really only to help them survive their bondage, not get ahead.

And that would probably be about 60% of the population.

[SakuraCherryBlossoms]

xD I'm surprised you think it's an awesome point! I thought you'd disagree but yeah. People only really work to get out of debt a lot of the time. But most people I know just add to their debt load over and over again anyway.

[ManOnFire]

@SakuraCherryBlossoms Oh no I never disagreed with a single thing you said. You've said a truth that a lot of people really would not admit to.

[Anonymous]

I really think you shouldn't group all of "20s" together.
I personally know I was a way different person at 25 than I was at age 20.
At 29, I'm the same as I was 25 for the most part but instead I have even a better sense of self.
4-5 years between ages makes a difference.
I think you should rename this to "early twenties".
Because as you age, you grab a different grip on things.

[HeBrokeMyHeart]

I still think you have the pressures in your late 20's too, I know my aunt did especially when deciding if she was leaving it to late to start a family & I know it's plaguing her as she moves into her 30's

[Opinion Owner]

I don't know because I had kids in my early twenties. I guess my biggest pressure is not yet having a career as quickly as I want. So I guess u r right

[MrMuffinMan]

I agree with this. Some excercises I did to figure out what I really wanted.
-Just pay attention to the things you would like to do and eventually you will see a common thread between them all
-realize that while money is nice; most things, if not all, have a lowest common denominator. Think about what you would do if you had all the money in the world, why do you want all that money. Then trace it back to what you really want to do as a lowest common denominator of those things. How can I live the life of my dreams, while still being an attainable goal, for me, not someone else? (Based on your skills)
-what do you already do, on a regular basis, without getting paid for it? How can you make money off of that?

good luck!

[Spirit_Is_Free]

Wise words for a young woman - If you don't have a fixed plan in your head at 20/21 don't worry - I would make decisions as they arise go to school, further education with a job or a certain career go with your gut - I have a friend who qualified as an accountant, worked for a few years then decided this isn't me and retrained as a speech therapist which she says is the best thing she ever done. She now runs her own successful speech therapy clinic.

[apple24]

Thats inspiring! <3 lol

[TheGuyNextDoor01]

Most girls screw up and sleep around a lot. Decent guys with options don't marry whores. Those girls that sleep around end up alone or with loser husbands they secretly despise and cheat on. There is a price to be paid for sleeping around.

[Anonymous]

I Agree, there is wayyyy to much pressure being in the 20s nowadays...

There is so much pressure to Find any job, Find a career, pursue said career. Find interests and passions, join clubs, have tons and tons of sex, be in peek physical condition, support your parents, travel, spend time with friends, party, stay trendy, and the list just goes on and on...

So much pressure :(

[phil2]

have you ever heard of quarterlife crisis? maybe you are having a little one. I had one too. I looked up the book and the website

[Anonymous]

We usually do this

Go to school
Have at least a part time job
Whine because we can't get a boyfriend or girlfriend

[QuestionMan]

My life in a nutshell lol

[YourFutureEx]

20s - too young for 50% of the things in this world, too old to do the rest.

[Deft_maiden]

God I hated my 20's. Young, dumb and never saw the big picture.

[Mustachekitteh]

Well I'm screwed since I'm 24 and still have no clue. :(

[fulloflife]

U should outline it instead of ranting. For example use bullets and pictures next time

[Dred1614]

Glad I have my life together. I feel bad for people that don't.

[amy_rhodes]

İ haven't got a boy friend

[SunsetRose]

Thank you for this