Why is it so hard to find a penpal?

[Guardian48]

Hi,

I'm tired of looking for someone to talk to, share ideas, have fun and improve my English skills. I've been trying to get fluent for years. My department had the education language of English, I've been working for multinational companies for almost 2 years. However, I'm still not comfortable with my English.

In order to maintain consistency, I'd like to have a pen pal but it's been impossible for me to find someone for years. The platforms that serve as a bridge between language learners have not helped me till now. Maybe that's because I'm the only one who tries to use these platforms in accordance with their purposes. I'm exhausted and discouraged. I'm about to give up... I can't even understand what's wrong. Is it me or others or something else? I don't know. I truly need your thoughts. I'd be so glad if you could help me. Thanks in advance.

[FunkyMonkee]

You can probably blame it on short attention spans thanks to things like twitter, facebook and people that mostly believe an e-mail should be no longer than a sentence or two.
I tend to write long ones and think of them more as what they are supposed to be, electronic letters. Some people get pissed at me for writing so much in an e-mail but, in the first place, I'm kind of in the same ball park you are: I can't find anyone to talk to or be friends with and, even if I do, it's just via typing away on the internet instead of actually having someone stop over for a while to talk, play cards, listen to music, etc.. I had very little of that before (most of my life) but, where I am now, I get NONE of it!!
And, secondly, it's BECAUSE I have no one to talk to that I write so much! Even worse is when I write a long e-mail in hopes that I'll get responses of some sort to all of the stuff I talked about in the e-mail and, what I get back is a sentence or two! That's not a response! That's more of a brush-off!! "I don't have want to take the time to write you a response to everything so, I'm just gonna lump it all together and respond with, 'Wow! You DO have a lot on your plate! Good luck with that!'".
I get a response like that and I think, "Gee! Thanks for your advice!!" Now I know who not to try to get advice from!
Your English "sounds" fine, to me.

[Guardian48]

I do understand you, and I feel you understood me. It's both good and bad to see someone knows what I've been thorugh. It's good, because I've someone who understands me. It's bad, because I'm not the only one suffering from all these. I don't know what to say. I'm speechless, and I'm exhausted, out of energy. I've no motivation and desire to learn and improve my language skills. I think it's burnout what I'm having now. I'd like to write more, and actually I can. But my brain almost stopped working :D Will be back tomorrow with a fresh mind. It's nice to hear that my English is not that bad :D

[FunkyMonkee]

Yes, I know exactly what you mean.
So far, your English is much better than most native English speakers! I see TONS of stupidity and grammatical errors in the way people born & raised here talk and write! I can only imagine it's one of two things, 1. Teachers no longer teach, or 2. Students are too busy playing with their little toy phones to pay attention to the teachers that DO teach!

[chulo1992]

Finding penpals are easy... it's finding genuine people that want to link up in person that is the problem

[JoyGirl]

Speak English whenever you can, and you could find someone on G@G to be your penpal.
There is a guy from Turkey who hit me up to help with his English a year ago, and we talk every now and then.

You can also try penpal sites (Google good ones). :)

[Guardian48]

I've been on Cambly for a year and making 3 lessons per week. We speak (not much because I'm working remotely) English at job. I'm trying to contact travellers through Couchsurfing, but you know, the pandemic has cut it :) I guess I tried almost all penpal sites, I even bought premium subscriptions but didn't work. I don't know what people are looking for. I'm baffled. As seen, I've already put incredible effort and time in finding penpals and making friends, haven't I? What do you think? Isn't it really enough effort? I feel overwhelmed now, I think I've lost my focus and attention on learning. Since I'm no longer able to figure it out, I wanted to ask you. Thanks for your message, I appreciate it! :)

[JoyGirl]

Hmmm…then I don't know what to tell you. 🥲

[JoyGirl]

Maybe travel to English speaking countries when you can? 🤔
It doesn’t have to be a lot, but enough to keep your English well.

[Guardian48]

You know, it's not that easy to travel abroad when you have a full-time job. Even if I manage to go abroad, it's only for a limited time. It looks my bad luck loves me so much :) You can't imagine how disappointing it is being day by day... Strolling along the shore and having a cuppa would be lovely now ahah