Would I be an asshole if?

[Koneko911]

I work at a daycare for those of you who don't know. And we are understaffed. I work with the babies, which has 6 kids enrolled currently. And a teacher is only allowed to watch 4 babies at once. So we have two teachers for this room. We'll this morning the other teacher told me she's thinking of calling out tomorrow to spend time with her daughter who's home from college. But this is annoying because that's not to me a reason to not come in. Of that was then I'd everytime my boyfriend was on town use him as an excuse to not work. She has the weekend with her kid. But I had to tell her it's fine, because of I don't she'll be mad. Bit would I be an asshole to be honest and tell her it's not fair. That she needs to come in because that's shitty to me. Especially when she was just out for a week saying she was sick

Updates

2 mo

Well my idiot boss let her take 2morrow off. So im gonna be stuck with all 6 babies

Updates

2 mo

by the way to make it even more annoying she lied Monday her kid missed the bus just to take that day off as well

[rosemilk]

that actually is a fair reason, do you not have PTO? and you should be taking PTO every time your boyfriend is in town (sounds long distance so you two don't have much time together) to spend time with him since you barely see him. why do you not take PTO? work isn't life... it's called work/life balance. how is this not fair? because you don't take time off? so you don't want others to take time off? because it'll be hard on you? that is life...

[Koneko911]

I wouldn't care if she didn't literally just take a week off faking sick (and she was faking. I literally saw her out of work fine). And she whines anytime anyone else takes time off for reasons she thinks is stupid. And constantly has no issues wirh leaving me with 6 plus babies but bitches if I leave the room 2 even use the restroom and she has more than 4 babies for like 2 minutes

[rosemilk]

okay i see that. but just don't make work your life. please take time for yourself too. it also sounds like you need to find a new job

[Koneko911]

I try to. But I get bitched at by my coworkers for taking time off. Even when sick. Literally got called out by one of them during a meeting about taking time off when sick

[HelpfulWoman]

i mean, it isn't fair and it's illegal to have not enough carers for the children.
its not being an asshole to point that out. if she wants time off with her kid, she needs to organise it IN ADVANCE.

[Koneko911]

How? All I did was point out she lied to take another day off. That's not trolling 😒 that's pointing out I have a shitty coworker

[DJB72]

Time off when there's a legal minimum staff ratio isn't something you can just take like that. It could result in you losing your job if an inspector makes a drop by visit. They'd close you down and it's likely you'd lose police clearance to work with children as well.

She's the asshole.

[Koneko911]

Unfortunately we aren't due to have an inspection just yet. And the owner is sorta a dumbass he let's them just take off if they want because they go to his church.

[DJB72]

Whistleblowers have legal protection normally. A "drop in" inspection isn't scheduled by the business deliberately. The idea is they can arrive at any moment - often in reaction to a tip...

[Koneko911]

U have no idea how much I seriously wanna call them. I'm so annoyed cause again I wouldn't gave cared most likely, but this working has been bitching the past 2 weeks about another worker she claims doesn't help her. Yet she has no problem constantly leaving me with the kids by myself, but if anyone doesn't help her she whines. I literally have text from her just bitching all last week

[DJB72]

So look for other posts, and talk up where you are -"it's great but I need more space for advancement" etc.

Then the day you leave call the inspector...

[Billlewis]

I've enjoyed reading your questions and comments and I think you're entirely within your rights to do this. I started following you and I'd be delighted if you'd like to follow me as well, ma'am. Thank you very much.

[KostasKouvalis]

Looks like I'm a little late here, but this happened constantly at my old job. Before we got new supervision they used to rotate us so no the same people didn't always have to work weekends. They stuck me on weekends for the whole season, while the new girl I was originally supposed to work with, got put on Mon - Wed, because she had no time to hangout with her boyfriend. Not my fucking problem. What did you put on your availability form? He can change HIS schedule. Figure it out! It seemed like everyone at that company had an excuse except ME. When I asked for weekends off they only gave me Sundays and made a huge fuss about it. And the stupid thing was, if you wanted to work 4 days you HAD to work weekends.

I don't know what happened to employers but they've gotten too soft. Back in the day you would have to lie if you wanted to get a day off for something like that. "Wanting to hangout with your boyfriend", is not an excuse to not come to work. It's also funny how the boyfriend never asks for time off at HIS job. If I were you, I wouldn't have shown up either or at least demanded overtime pay. I wonder what they would have done.

[Koneko911]

Oh I didn't come in yesterday after her pulling that shit Monday. Now she's acting all pissy to me this morning and frankly idc. She knows why I'm mad and that she's wrong

[TheSpaceGnome]

"to spend time with her daughter who's home from college."

Actually thats a good reason.

Its stupid to let your job interfere with your life. its supposed to provide income so you can live how you want. If it doesn't do that, its not the right job for the person.

[Koneko911]

Her daughter had been home for at least a week by then, had visited the day prior also. And had just been home on holiday during December and January. That's why I'm mad about it. Had she been home for only a few days I wouldn't have cared. But she has been home several times

[TheSpaceGnome]

It doesn't matter if you're mad about it.
You don't get to choose how many days a year that anyone does or doesn't work (aside from yourself of course), If you feel that you cannot or just don't want to pick up the slack, then don't, just work the amount of hours you want to work, and if that job doesn't allow that, find a different job.

[Koneko911]

Actually it does when I'm left with 6 babies by myself constantly because she chooses to call out or just not help me in the classroom. Then yes it does become my problem and my business. If she can't do her job she needs to. quit or be fired. It's not about if I can or can't pick up the slack, I shouldn't have to when a worker decides she just doesn't wanna do her job

[TheSpaceGnome]

If she quits, and no one else takes up the job, then your entire rant becomes meaningless, and you are still stuck deciding to either pick up the slack, or quit yourself. Since you can't stop a person from quitting, you cannot control how many hours they work.

[TheSpaceGnome]

The bottom line is you will just have to choose to do what you want to do, and others will do what they want to do.

[Anonymous]

You should call off for tomorrow. Fuck her and that stupid boss. Let the boss come in to watch all 6 kids since he’s okay with her leaving you stranded so often? No you are not a bad person for prioritizing your own needs when someone is clearly taking advantage of your kindness and being selfish with all the time off she’s taking. Call in sick tomorrow and see how chill the boss is then about her taking even MORE time off.

[Koneko911]

I took Tuesday off because I was mad about Monday. She's been angry since

[Opinion Owner]

Oh well. She can get over it. She does you dirty all the time, don’t worry about her or her anger. You didn’t do anything wrong by asserting boundaries with her.

[Koneko911]

I know and I don't care. I'm sick of her whining about others not helping her but she doesn't care when doing it to me

[Opinion Owner]

I hear that. Dealing with people who are so selfish can be a real pain in the foot.

[OlderAndWiser]

You don't supervise your co-worker, so I wouldn't question her decision. She needs to get approval from a supervisor, right? And apparently she has done that. I would simply ask the supervisor who else will be working in your classroom tomorrow.

[Koneko911]

No one was but me. I had all 6 kids that day, then the following Monday all 6 again when she randomly called out and never showed up

[OlderAndWiser]

Do the DCF inspectors ever talk to employees to ask about ratios?

[Koneko911]

Unfortunately no. They come and inspect but by then everyone has moved around kids or we get lucky and they come on days we are in compliance with ratio

[OlderAndWiser]

Do you want to move to another daycare?

[Koneko911]

I'm hoping to leave in a few months

[OlderAndWiser]

If you report this to DCF now, you will probably lose your job.

[Koneko911]

Yep. Unfortunately

[Still-alive]

How often does her daughter come home from college?

if its a one time thing then I don’t see an issue with letting her go. But if its a regular thing then i can see an issues with that.

[Koneko911]

She's been home for about 3 weeks now. And was home back in January as well

[Koneko911]

Her daughter was literally here at the daycare yesterday afternoon

[Still-alive]

Hmm if it were me i'd allow it but only one day

[Koneko911]

Okay

[Still-alive]

However im not in your situation to really know how she is completely. if you feel like she is just trying to avoid working then don't allow it. use your best judgement.

[Koneko911]

I feel like she is. Cause she's been literally whining to me this past two weeks because another worker was wirh her fir inspection and she kept bitching the worker don't help and guilt tripping me back n2 helping her

[exitseven]

Okay, you suck it up and the next time your boyfriend is in town you should bang in sick.

[Koneko911]

Honestly I'm thinking about next time my boyfriend can get a good day off, taking the day off myself and having him pick me up and we go to his house all day

[exitseven]

@Koneko911. Do it, you won't regret it

[jahaims]

Family is more important thank work

[Koneko911]

I would agree if her child hadn't been out of school for weeks now, and she has the weekend to see her. It's not like her kid just came home from break

[Bklynbadboy12]

Sometime you do come across a bit rude

[Koneko911]

please explain how cause I'm curious as I'm definitely not rude at work

[Bklynbadboy12]

I don't know about work but on here you do sometimes I don't know if you mean to but sometimes you do

[Koneko911]

Like? Cause I just feel like you're referring to me telling you I'm not into you when you kept trying knowing I had a boyfriend and you were making me uncomfortable

[Bklynbadboy12]

What?