Ok, so my best guy friend and I used to be super close, we'd talk all the time, hang out all the time, pretty much share everything the way best friends do. (We were never romantically involved and there was no hint of either of us ever wanting to be.)
Then he started dating this new girl and suddenly stopped talking to me, stopped hanging out, stopped answering texts. He's obviously had other relationships while we've been friends and every friendship goes through phases, but he pretty much severed contact for almost a year. We'd run into each other at parties or dinners with mutual friends, but never talked or hung out. It really hurt my feelings, I basically figured I'd lost a really good friend for no reason I could think of.
Then- out of the blue he breaks up with the girl, and a couple weeks later he calls me and wants to go back to our normal friendship. Here's the thing- I missed him as a friend and I'd like us to go back to the way things were too. But I'm also kind of upset that he froze me out for a year and seems unaware of how much he hurt me.
We're pretty straight with each other, so while we were busy catching up, I pointed out I could count on one hand the times I'd seen him in a year. He said "Yeah, probably because the ex HATED you..."
And yeah, ok, I get it that you're going to try to make your relationship work, but it hurt me that he could willingly cut off our friendship like that. I didn't say anything more about it though.
Am I over-reacting, should I just let bygones be bygones, or am I justified in still feeling a little hurt?
Then he started dating this new girl and suddenly stopped talking to me, stopped hanging out, stopped answering texts. He's obviously had other relationships while we've been friends and every friendship goes through phases, but he pretty much severed contact for almost a year. We'd run into each other at parties or dinners with mutual friends, but never talked or hung out. It really hurt my feelings, I basically figured I'd lost a really good friend for no reason I could think of.
Then- out of the blue he breaks up with the girl, and a couple weeks later he calls me and wants to go back to our normal friendship. Here's the thing- I missed him as a friend and I'd like us to go back to the way things were too. But I'm also kind of upset that he froze me out for a year and seems unaware of how much he hurt me.
We're pretty straight with each other, so while we were busy catching up, I pointed out I could count on one hand the times I'd seen him in a year. He said "Yeah, probably because the ex HATED you..."
And yeah, ok, I get it that you're going to try to make your relationship work, but it hurt me that he could willingly cut off our friendship like that. I didn't say anything more about it though.
Am I over-reacting, should I just let bygones be bygones, or am I justified in still feeling a little hurt?
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