I'm afraid my boyfriend thinks I'm a loser! Need help.

[Anonymous]

I don't know how to deal with this anymore. Sometimes I just want to die, because I feel so sad. Usually I don't pity myself, but other people make me feel like there is something wrong with me... like my boyfriend.

I don't have friends. Sometimes I meet people but it's never long term. They come and go.

For instance, I switch jobs a lot because I can't keep one, so if I meet people there I hang out with them and after

I leave a job I usually don't hear anything from these so called friends.

I don't know why people don't like me but I've learned to live with it. When I met my boyfriend I tried to hide this from him. But as our relationship progressed into a long term one, we have been together for almost 5 years, he started to notice things...such as that people never called me and I never hang out with friends. At some point I told him, well he asked.

He is the cool, popular guy, very social so he doesn't understand. He makes friends everywhere he goes.

Try to explain that to a guy like him why you suck at making friends...it's hard.

I'm so unlike him, but I start to notice that he is really worried about me lately. Well worried... I don't know whether he is worried

or tries to ridicule me and make me feel bad about myself. I don't know.

Recently he is trying to bring the subject up all the time and he keeps telling me how to live my life... Get up, don't just sit at home, get out, yada yada...

It drives me nuts and he puts me in that vulnerable and uncomfortable position every time he brings the subject up. Why is he having that weird smile on his face every time he brings the subject up?

Sometimes I just feel like a loser around him. Sometimes I'm like...will you please shut up. All that talking is not going

to make my situation better. Right now my confidence level dropped to a zero. I feel so anxious, unlike myself around him.

I constantly think he thinks I'm pathetic loser. I feel so depressed and bad about myself. My boyfriend keeps me reminding of my past, just like those teasing kids at school did and those depressing feelings are back.

I don't what to do anymore... am I really such a bad, pathetic person? Is there something wrong with me?

Why is my boyfriend acting like this? Is he worried or trying to ridicule me?

[human_condition]

It sounds like he's trying to help, but as an introvert I know how annoying that can be- people that make friends easily just don't undestand that I can't talk to people.

However it sounds like you can talk to people, you just have trouble holding friends down. Try and get close to one or two people, really get to know them.

You're not a loser and it's impossible that people just don't like you- if that's the case why is your boyfriend with you?

I think he genuinely cares, but if he's hurting you then you should talk to him about it. Explain that you're just not as social as he is.

[Anonymous]

To me it honestly seems like he just wants to help. That could be what the little smile is for. He's trying to show you it's not that bad and he wants you to be more open with people. You are definitely not a pathetic loser, and I wouldn't think he'd think so, unless he was very ignorant.

[Kelrya]

I want to help but I think I need to have more details of what your like with friends and what he's doing exactly.

[Marina_22]

It is not the real relationship if you are afraid to show your boyfriend you are scared of smth.. or you are scared to look ugly... I mean first of all you have to try to learn how to be yourself...

Believe me from my experience, I am only 27, but the life showed me a lot of times when you be yourself you will be more happier :)