Should I be mad that my friend stood me up again?

[Anonymous]

My hall mate and I made plans to go to the campus block party, and I texted her what time I was leaving. She never responded, so I went with my roommate. I even saw that she opened and read my text, so she could have at least told me that she couldn’t make it, instead of standing me up. Then yesterday, we made plans to go to breakfast together (we usually go at 10:30) so I texted her and asked if she was still coming, again no response. It pisses me off that she makes plans with me, stands me up, and doesn’t have the courtesy to tell me that she can’t make it. So, I don’t want to tell her how I feel, because she has paid for my food in the past, without expecting me to pay her back.

[zanypanda]

I do not think that you should get mad because sometimes your friends may be suffering with other things and that's explain why they cancel. I had a friend who was doing the same thing and I found out eventually that this friend was suffering from depression. You should speak to your friend one and one and explain how you feel; you shouldn't feel uncomfortable bringing up your feelings with a friend just because hey have paid for you in the past.

[Asker]

She didn’t cancel, she straight up stood me up. I think I know why she didn’t show up to breakfast with me; she likes this guy who has a girlfriend, and he has told her that he has a girlfriend, and yet, she still wants to hangout with him. Since I saw them and a few other people together the night before, my guess is that she got in late and didn’t feel like waking up early. However, she still could’ve told me that

[zanypanda]

Oh I see. Well you should let her know your feelings and explain to her that you would like if she informs you when she wants to cancel.

[Asker]

She did this before in the past, and I talked to her, then we stopped hanging out for a while.

[zanypanda]

This is a tough situation

[Asker]

Yep. So I think I’m just going to stop hanging out with her.

[Leafpool2]

I think you should ask her what's up. Like don't be angry about it just "hey are you okay we were gonna meet up for breakfast and you didn't come in no big deal just wondering what's up" if she ignores that then I don't know. But she could just be feeling kinda shitty I don't know her.

[sadismyname]

Um ok she paid for your food that's nice but it doesn't mean you have to tolerate everything because she paid a I don't know 30 dollar bill. Tell her if you can't make it at least tell me so i don't have to wait for you so long. just talk to her about it.

[veronicalynn]

Most definitely.. Send you a text a call email smoke single something not just leaving you hanging

[Asker]

So should I talk to her about it?

[veronicalynn]

Absolutely.. If you can't count on your friends then that's not much of a friendship

[Asker]

She texted me back and said that she was up late and just saw my text

[Drumlin2001]

If you're brooding over how she's treating you, not talking about it is only gonna let it simmer.
It dosent have to be a big deal, just let her know that it's a little disrespectful to treat you that way.
Of course, maybe you should think about whether you continue to make plans woth her if she's going to be so flaky

[Caaarl]

Yes but at the same time if she's canceling on you more and more you should stop trying to go out with her. I wouldn't ask a friend to go out the next day if they ditched me the day before. That seems really needy.

[Asker]

She made plans with me both days

[Caaarl]

strange i just would start passing on her unless she was litterally at the place

[Paris13]

She is giving you a hurtful hint that she really doesn't want to be your friend. xx

[gcusack]

If you are close friends yes but if you are afraid to tell her it sounds like you aren't that close and while you shouldn't stop being friends, it would seem you aren't a priority for her, it sounds like you might need to find other people to hang out with.

[Masculion]

She bought you food, she didn't buy your silence. If you feel upset about something, talk to her about it. This may just be part of her personality which you can either live with or move on. But it can't hurt to talk about it.

[Anonymous]

I'd stop making plans with them and if you want them to come send a message something like "I'm going to get food at 1pm if you want to come?" Then you can get food then and it's up to them if they do or don't come. Become the boss and make it more your allowing them to socialize with you rather than you want them to be with you

[Lee06]

So because she has paid for your food in the past means she can just walk over you? Yes, you should be mad! Definitely discuss this with her.

[Paris13]

Fair Weather Friend to the End..
Stay Clear, dear... She will Not even Notice you not Near. xxoo

[BadAssHunter]

What does her paying have to do with her being a jerk? Don't invite her anymore. Go out with someone else and if she ever brings it up then tell her why.

[ParsnipDuck]

I have friends that read a question and dont reply its annoying but I don't really get mad over it, then again I don't make plans with them people so I woulnt count them as close friends

[Fred0]

Thats what i do, then they ask why I'm not trying to hangout with them.

[CINDY16]

so what if she pays food for you in the past? you should be mad

[monkeynutts]

Don't invite her, she will be wondering where you are.

[Meta_4]

wouldn't bother wasting my time with them.

[thottiana]

She doesn’t want to be friends anymore

[sidvt]

U talk to her n solve it

[Steveg82]

me too lot