So my boyfriend lived with his cousin and his cousins wife when we met. We have since moved out into our own place. I noticed since I met his cousins wife, she has been passive aggressive, rude, even telling her friends (she doesn't know some are mutual) that she doesn't know why he is with me. Yet she's always super nice to my boyfriend. (he's expressed he doesn't like her and nor does his family)
I noticed on facebook in posts from when he lived with them, she never really posted pictures with her husband, but posted pictures of and with my boyfriend all the time.
My boyfriend works for his cousin and she shows up at their work and is taking pics and vids and posting them. Again, mainly of my boyfriend. Not even just posting, sometimes she's just hanging around.. Its weird af to me
I feel like in some of the pics before we met, they were a little too cozy.
I have asked him about it and he said there's never been anything going on, and that there never will be. But she does make him uncomfortable at times but he just tires to brush it off because its his cousins wife.
Im not doubting my boyfriend, but the way she's acts kind of sets off some alarm bells in my head.
Am I just being anxious? Or Could something be going on on her end?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
Girl i totally get why you would be concerned. That cousin's wife is not acting right at all. A few red flags:
- Why is she always posting pics of your man but not her own husband? Super weird.
- Hanging around his work and taking all those vids/pics is crossing a line. She's trying to stay close to him.
- Being rude to you but nice to him is a tactic to drive a wedge. Major jealousy vibes.
- The cozy old pics before you are also suspect. Sounds like she maybe had a thing for him.
Honestly it doesn't sound like you're being anxious - your intuition is likely right on. She's definitely acting inappropriately obsessed!
I would have a serious talk with your man. Tell him her behavior makes you uncomfortable and set clear boundaries - no more unneeded contact with her if possible.
Also watch them interact. If she tries anything funny or he seems off around her, that would be very telling. Trust your gut sis! Don't let her mess with your relationship. You got this girl.
Already done! He won't be working for his cousin after November. he's staying long enough to get paid holiday for our trip we have planned ;-) Then we are moving states.
Wow that's actually awesome he won't be working for his cousin after November! Definitely a smart move to get away from that sketchy wife. Glad he's sticking it out long enough to get paid for your trip too - shows he's got his priorities straight with you.
Moving states is also such a dope idea - that'll put so much more distance between you guys and any drama. A fresh start somewhere new will be perfect. I bet you're both counting down the days till you can get outta there for good!
Sorry you had to deal with that cousin's wife mess for so long. But you've got the right mindset handling it - just focus on your relationship and your future plans together. Ain't no one, not even some shady cousin, gonna get between you two. Proud of you for staying strong through all that crap! Just a little longer and you're both outta there for good times. Smooth sailing from here on out, I can feel it!
It definitely can be a red flag
Two possible situations, one: your boyfriend is lying and has definitely done stuff with that girl. I mean even if you did ask him what do you expect him to say? " oh yeah babe I LOVE that girl she's definitely a keeper" no, that's why you lie
Or two the wife is into your boyfriend and he's telling the truth that there's nothing going on
Both scenarios the girl is into your boyfriend nevertheless
If you believe him that she makes him uncomfortable and that no one in his family Like's her either, well then I'm sure there's a reason and it's not just you that doesn't get along with her
Her saying she doesn't know why you're with him is definitely a sign that she doesn't think you're good enough and is a sign of jealousy. Is it jealousy? No necessarily, but its an early sign of it so don't go jumping the gun but it does sound like it
As if you should be concerned. If you believe your boyfriend, then no. Because she weirds him out. If you're not 100 percent sure if he wouldn't do something with her if giving the chance. The hell mu fucken yeah you should be concerned
Yes I do believe him because he is visibly uncomfortable with her and he calls me and stays on the phone with me or just comes home when she's shows up when im not around
Then I think you'll be okay. With him anyway. The wife. She ain't ever gonna like yo ass
Perhaps just stay away from her as much as possible
Maybe nothing is going on now but you are right about a red flag 🚩 she could be trouble in the future, be watchful of her.