Does my Lesbian friend like me? Or is it just me? I'm a girl. (SHORT)

[Anonymous]

I'm bisexual. But recently I've been picking up on something more with my friend who is a lesbian. She talks to me alot, laughs alot, always wants to meet me, have lunch and just 'hang out'. She texts me a lot and always makes sure I get home OK or asks if I was alrite. When I leave, she hugs me.

I'm beginning to like her, but I don't wanna make any moves, as she just dumped her ex AND I might be mistaking her friendly persona with flirtation. Last night, I was jealous when she was having a great time with her long-time friend (who is straight). I'm confused, maybe she likes her? I don't know.

So, any signs that would make me sure of whether she likes me? First time crushing on a girl.

Updates

+1 y

Oh I also forgot, my family don't accept homosexuality and do not know of my sexuality. So making moves is more difficult than it seems.

[butterfly333]

The case is that you are nervous about your feelings, and you don't wanna lose this friend... Ok. I understand, that you need to know if she likes you more than just "friendly", but no signs can tell you for sure the real feelings of her. If you are friends, as good as you say, you should be able to talk about (almost) everything, so you can try this - tell her that you have feelings about a girl (not her) and ask her for advice... Her jealousy - if existing - will appear... depends on her character how, but for sure - from silence to convincing you that women are bad choice for you, it is a sign that she has something more than a friendly care for you.

if you are younger, care is a sign of protection, which is sign of love. But love and sex are not the same, you know. So to identify the love she has for you, you need to be more open to her.

And not "only her love" is what you want, am I right? You desire to get to a deeper level in your terms, so start it light as a joke. You need to see her face, though it is hard in a moments like this... because chatting on-line or messaging is just words, while feelings are directly "projected" to the face.

If she is in love with you, she would do special stuff for you, as little gestures of care - gifts or helping you in difficult moments. - sign 1. Her eyes would follow every single reaction of yours. - sign 2

(If you are in trouble - for example - you can't get home, because you have lost your keys, and she is there for you no matter the early hour and no matter the things that she has to do... then you have a love sign.

I could tell you more, but while having no idea about her as a person - (behavior, experience and etc.) I might get wrong. So try it slowly and carefully. My advice is that being sincere is the best plan, at least you will know if there is chance for something deeper. If there is none, you might lose her, but think of this - love sometimes goes to a bad end, but loving in secret is suffering too, are you strong enough to suffer this way?

[Asker]

Thanks for this. You really made sense when you said to take things slow and yeah you're right, because I don't want to lost that friendship we have. I can't believe I'm feeling for her, my family do NOT accept homosexuality so it is hard for me to think it is OK feeling this way but I can't help it. We remain the best of friends and she still always texts me. I've given up pursuing this relationship, it may not ever go further because of my family. I can't hide things from them. Its complicated

[butterfly333]

Your parents want you to be happy, though not the way that it would make you happy indeed.

It is not only about sexuality, it is about everything. The ancient war between generations, is not for lack of love, but for lack of comprehension -> different times bear different points of views and believes.

One day you will have to chose what's more important for you - to be happy inside, or outside. One fake smile and 1000 "I am allright"-s doesn't make you feel happy and sensible...

My advice about this state is keep your private live - "private" indeed. What's behind the bedroom's door is your life, - not public, not even theirs... Why?! Because they have never asked you,( I am sure), weather they have to have sex or not... Sorry for this uncouth explanation, I do not tell you not to respect and love your parents, nooo, but to respect and love yourself too! No matter if you will be with a guy or a woman, no matter if its concerning your job, skills, dreams and ect. You are the Sun in your Soul system, the rest are just... satellites. Take care and good luck!

[snowboarder720]

hmmm... Have you tried the "Hair Whoosh technique"? If I was a lesbian, I'd be a sucker for the hair whoosh. Like the ones they do in Herbal Essence commercials and sh*t. Yeah, make sure there's a fan and everything, then when she's looking at you for a response to a question... LET HER HAVE IT. Do the hair whip and turns with a flirty smile. If possible, have "I just died in your arms tonight" played by The Outfield...

That should leave her speechless and jaw dropped. Let me know how it turns out for ya. Also, get it on video too if you can. Send me the link to it.

[Asker]

You know I want to move our relationship to another level but I can't, family reasons. I really want her to myself though. Argh, why is life so damn hard. But thanks for your input. LOL and no, no video, I like things private.

[snowboarder720]

You should'nt let your family control what makes you happy.

[Asker]

Thanks snowboarder720, means alot

[HandsomeRaj]

Relationships no matter what type are sensitive. In this case why not allow her to make the first move.

Put your emotions aside (easier said than done - not impossible) and use your head more than you heart if you want happiness for you and those around you.

Every behavior cannot be completely analyzed even by a professional, so I recommend you do what I'm telling you there.

And oh, if she's having a great time and you are getting uncomfortable then 'I' wouldn't call that love (for future reference)

[Asker]

Im basically waiting on HER to make the first move. But if she does I don't know what I would do, first time coming out for a girl and my family don't know that I'm bi-curious. Well her having a great time was different, she was having a great time with some other girl...not me...so I guess jealousy has got to do with love at some level lol

[HandsomeRaj]

1. The girl with who she was having 'a great time' is HER (long time?) FRIEND (straight too at that, so no question of sexuality where generally one get's jealous)

2. She's just broken up with her flame so please give her time and be with her when she needs it, that way you will get a chance to get noticed the relationship way. AND if & when she gets interested in you (which is likely if you do this right) then she'll tell you herself

3. DON'T rush things else you'll spoil things for yourself.

[Asker]

Oh I see, you are totally right. Thanks for this. I tend to rush into things. But yeah you made perfect sense. Thank you.

[HandsomeRaj]

Happy for you and I pray you get what you want :) good luck

[Asker]

Thank you Raj :)

[pirofaz]

well, just go for it and hide it. its not that hard, as a girl it isn't odd for you to have female friends, just pretend she is just a friend and make sure to not do anything that risk you getting discovered. as long as you don't kiss in public places or in your house you will be ok.

i know itsw hard but you only have to be like that until you attain economical independence. go to college make a good career, be the best at it, etc. family is important, but to not have a girlfriend for a prolonged time, a specia one, will make you go dry in your soul.

just be smart at it.

[phonezoo]

If her friend is straight, it wouldn't matter if she likes her or not, right?

Just make your move, see what happens

sounds hot, btw

[Asker]

My family don't accept homosexuality so its pretty much hard to 'make a move' and I mean a move in terms of going out with her.

[phonezoo]

Then you have to ask yourself, is family more important than love, or not

[Asker]

Wow. That's ...reeally hard. lol

[phonezoo]

Yeah, something's hard alright ;)

[Asker]

Oh for heavens sake lol

[phonezoo]

What?

[Konnour]

It doesn't sound any different how straight girls treat each other.

[Asker]

Well perhaps this case is different because I feel for her? lol

[Konnour]

Probably.

[Catapillar1]

When you say your family doesn't accept homosexuality are you referring to your parents?