Is pretty privilege real? What’s your input on it/how bad do you think it is?

Question

I personally think it’s real

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Okay, look. I've been beautiful. And I've been ugly. And I can tell you that being beautiful is very bittersweet. This is going to be a long story so bear with me. When I was younger and in my ugly duckling phase, most people would ignore me. Usually, whenever people would make fun of me and give me negative attention, it was usually the guys. The girls almost never gave me any attention because I wasn't a threat. As I got older and became more beautiful, I noticed how guys would give me positive attention. But I always knew there was only one thing they liked and it wasn't my personality. The girls would usually give me negative attention and if they started out giving me positive attention, they would eventually make a full 180 and decide they don't like me. I have maybe 1 female friend that I truly trust. I also have a couple acquaintances I trust well enough. Other than them, I have a lot of women trying to be my friend but eventually the friendship sours. I start to notice the looks they give me. They start making comments comparing the two of us, one upping me or they tell me something for the sole purpose of bragging to me or comparing themselves to me. Like one of my friends, let's call her Sarah. She would always give me compliments to the point it seemed a bit ingenuine. May it also be noted, she's not very secure. There is a guy she is in a "situationship" with and she asked me if she was pretty enough for him. I felt very sad and told her to never let anyone say she's not pretty enough. But one day, she kept telling me how this new girl who works in her department was telling her how she was the prettiest Asian woman she's ever seen. We are both Asian and it kind of came out of nowhere so I could tell it was to kind of boost up her self esteem.

One time, I complimented another friend's hair and makeup. Let's call her Maria. And instead of just saying thank you, she said, "And I didn't even try hard." She became friends on Instagram with this one girl, Dalia (I'll get to her later) and I figured it was fine and that just because I have issues with her does not mean everyone else will. But one day, she brought her up in casual conversation and told us about her personal life and said, "How can a mother" fill in the blank. She also talks a great deal about who's sleeping with whom and I am very weary of her, now.

There was another friend, Erica, who started off as my friend. She was telling me how she wanted to go get her EMT license renewed and become an EMT. I told her how that would be awesome and if I ever promoted to something, I might try for Corporal. The next time a Corporal position was open, I considered applying but decided against it. But soon after, Erica was promoted to Interim Corporal, which I thought was great for her. But even though she was technically promoted to "Interim Corporal," everybody was congratulating her on becoming "Corporal" and she kindly accepted. But when I congratulated her on becoming Corporal, she said, "Actually, I'm just Interim Corporal. But thanks anyways." I heard she was in a serious car accident and I texted her asking if she was okay. She responded, "Who is this?" Meaning she deleted my phone number. I told her who it was and she told me she accidentally listed me as someone else. But I knew that was not true because I texted her the first time I received her phone number. I also noticed she stopped following me on Instagram and she told me how someone stole her account like what happened to me. But later I found out that no one stole her account and she actually blocked me on Instagram. But after she resigned, she started following me on TikTok. Then there was Dalia, who started off acting like we were best friends. But I started noticing very mean girl habits. Like when she found out I have never been in a relationship before, she blurted out my relationship status and told everyone, "Abby doesn't date. She doesn't like boys," with a smirk on her face to try and embarrass me. It got even worse once she became Corporal. We were both female Dispatchers. Which is funny because when we used to be friends, she was telling me how she never wanted to be in Dispatch. But two weeks after I was "voluntold" to start learning, she volunteered to learn, herself. She always treated me poorly when I was Dispatching and once she became supervisor, she accused me of insubordination and got me written up. Then she complained to the Administration regarding my voice (I have a voice disorder) and got me kicked out of Dispatch. She was eventually termed and they put me back in the day after, lol. But she has tried to add me as a friend on Facebook twice and I declined. But she went ahead and liked one of my pictures, anyways, even though we are not even Facebook friends and I kept declining her several socialmedia accounts she would create and delete. All of these women started out really wanting to be my friend. After a little while, they just changed their minds. Also, now that I am pretty, I have heard three rumors regarding me sleeping with my coworkers. Apparently, I am sleeping with an EMT, my 67 year old supervisor and my 38 year old coworker who had been married for 10 years. All of these rumors were reported to me by friends. Sarah told me about the 38 year old and asked me if I was seeing him. I'm not sure if she misheard me because she told me it was weird and gross because he was married. Maria reported the rumor regarding the EMT which came about because of a female supervisor, Karen, reporting to another female supervisor, Marissa, how I was sitting next to him at a get together with coworkers. Maria also told me how the Lieutenant was "crying" about it when he heard and put the emphasis on "crying" with a look. But she didn't tell me about the actual rumor. I found out through a different friend, Connor. So long story short, when you're pretty, men will kiss your ass and women will be vicious.

HitsyHonesty · Accepted Answer

Real!
You get approached more, for romance. For job opportunities. Friendship! Because they associate that with being the best kind of person.
I could be a stuck up bitch but they don't know! Blinded by pretty!

caring__1 · Accepted Answer

Pretty is a double-edged sword. It opens some doors and closes others. People start treating you based on your looks rather than your abilities. That can be both positive and negative. It can be hard to feel truly appreciated as a person. I've tended to pass on pretty girls, as their looks or focus on their looks tends to complicate their life, and I've always preferred simple to complex.

I've seen some pretty girls hired because they are eye candy, yet they're never given legitimate work to allow them to advance. I've seen guys choose pretty girls, yet their focus is more on how it boosts their status rather than showing true caring for the girls. Focusing on appearance is very time consuming, taking away from other opportunities that might be more meaningful. Some people just focus on certain aspects... they may cover up their lack of self-care with fancy makeup, hair, nails and clothing, yet they can't actually hide what is underneath.

Make the most of all your true assets, in all areas. Subtle enhancements are fine, but never attempt to be something you're not, as you'll only look fake. Set your long-term objective priorities before choosing what you want to spend the most time on. Make sure your efforts are cost effective (time, money, energy, etc.). If you look around, you'll notice, that not all married people are pretty. There are qualities some people prioritize over looks. Looks may draw people's attention (both good and bad), but what do you bring to keep the relationship new and alive? For every type of person, there are people who appreciate that type of person. Be the best you rather than attempt to mold yourself into any ideal.

RoοstеrBrеаst · Accepted Answer

Is pretty privilege real, or is it all in our heads? Is beauty the key to success, or are we being misled? Do we judge people based on their looks, or on what's inside? These questions and more, make us want to hide.

But let's not shy away from the truth, shall we? Pretty privilege exists, whether we like it or not, you see, It's a societal norm that's been ingrained in our minds, For years and years, we've been taught that beauty defines. ﾠ

It's not fair, we know, to judge a book by its cover, But that's what happens when we're in a hurry or in a stupor, We don't take the time to get to know the person inside, Instead, we rely on looks to decide. ﾠ

So, what can we do to break free from this cycle? How can we unlearn what's been taught since preschool? It starts with ourselves, and the way we treat others, With kindness and compassion, like sisters and brothers.

Screenwriter · Answer

Pretty privilege not only covers women, it covers men. With men it's handsome and tall.

Though we are biologically programmed to, generally, genetically comprise intelligence and attractiveness, those qualities don't always come together. This means there are as many dumb, pretty, careless people as there are attractive, sensitive, smart people.

And there is a final caveat: Because we LIKE attractiveness, humans GIVE privilege to the attractive when they have not earned it. If you're Ken and Barbie, and just as plastic and emptyheaded, you'll be awarded what you haven't earned.

They've done studies. So check yourself, as well as everyone else. A pretty face is no guarantor of a pretty brain or soul.

zeitgeist057 · Answer

It's real, but it's a sword with two edges.

On one hand, you do get benefits of better treatment, more opportunity, lighter penalties for bad behavior, &c.

But with all that good treatment, there is a higher risk of getting "spoiled", and turning into a monster. This is a very real and life-affecting problem. Physical beauty doesn't last forever, and those who didn't need to have a good personality, and therefore never developed one, suffer more in the long term.

Also, there will be a higher amount of unwanted attention. Just as a celebrity can't really just go out to grab a bite to eat without getting a half a dozen or more fans wanting time them, beautiful people will also get "fans" who feel entitled to some of their time and attention. They can also turn mean if not given what they want. Not always, but enough that it can affect how the "pretty privileged" person sees the world and the caution or attitude they start to project out there.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/Wv7ZT8M32A8

Maybe not the first time, maybe not the 50th time, but eventually other people being entitled will wear down almost everyone.

Kiss_Me · Answer

Yes, I do believe that attractive people have it easier than the unattractive.

Power dynamics in Human interactions work just like Thermal dynamics. Power, like heat is NEVER taken. It must be given.

I spoke about this with my Father. He told me to view attractiveness as a curse. Pity the beautiful girls because its VERY hard to have a true friend. Other just want to associate with them so they can elevate their own social status. Romantic interest are mostly efforts to score bragging rights for dating, etc. with a hot girl. Privately they are more lonely because many date worthy guys will not ask them out due to the potential social backlash.

I had to learn to treat them no differently than anyone else. Depending on the girl, sometimes it comes across as, "I'm JUST having a conversation with you. NO, I'm not hitting on you. Get over yourself." Other times its, "You are cool, interesting, and fun. Lets go out. I don't give a damn how pretty you are."

Don't give attractive people the power to act stupidly, and they usually will not.

It seems to work for me.

4ngelic · Answer

its very real (and its scientifically a thing anyways). like the better you look the more people like you, the more your treated well, its easier to get jobs, stuff like that. and on the flip side, the worse you look the worse everything is

i've had my weight fluctuate in my teens so i've been at different degrees of skinny and fat, and i could tell that after a certain degree of overweight people start treating you less well. like they dont treat you bad (at least at that degree of fat), they're still nice but they're not as nice. and the more up you go, the worse it gets. on the flip side, the closer and closer you get to a pretty weight, the nicer people treat you

Rei13 · Answer

Pretty privilege exists for both men and women. If you’ve gone from unattractive to attractive, or vice versa, you will notice it a lot more than someone who hasn’t been on both sides. Though uglier people will notice it more than someone who is attractive. There are pros to being both ugly or beautiful but more for someone beautiful. People will pay more attention to what you have to say on average, they’re kinder to you, it is easier to find someone to date and have more options, easier to find jobs, people are more forgiving of your faults, etc. Cons are unwanted attention and your relationships/friendships may not be totally genuine. I have always had a pretty face so I’ve always been treated ok, but when I lost a ton of weight it is wild how much changed when I don’t think I changed that much as a person. It honestly made me more conscious of the people around me and making sure I’m treating them ok.

CrimsonAngel09 · Answer

It's like a saying I've come up with.

"You look beautiful, you get treated beautifully. You look like s**t, you get treated like s**t"

Unfortunately it's the latter for me, no matter how nice I am.

I had several instances while going to school, but I'll give one example.

Two popular pretty girls were heading to gym. A guy sees them, he smiles and holds the door open for them. Sees me coming he grimaces, and follows after them.

He was such a gentleman (sarcasm).

jennifer_bloom · Answer

I don't have a problem with pretty privilege unless the person with privilege cheats the system, like getting a 80% on a test when they only got 50% of the questions right, or being served before ugly people when the ugly person is in front of them in line. I once got annoyed cause a very very very good looking woman got higher status then me in university when I was more qualified than her because her professor probably had a crush on her.

Leapfrog00 · Answer

For some people maybe. I used to have a friend girl want to get hit on everywhere she went. She had blonde hair, blue eyes and a thin build. Every time I was with her, guys would tell me "you're one lucky guy" even though we weren't together. She would correct them and say we were just friends, but then again, she let it gets her head so bad, but it made her a class a bitch.

I would never date a girl like that, they are so self conceited. The blond friend I had was pretty to the guys who had low standards, who just wanted laid, but to me, she was gross ugly. People who date on looks deserve to get cheated on, and this girl cheated on every boyfriend she ever had, got pregnant 11 times, had 9 abortions.

If I talk to a girl who is pretty, if she only talks about herself, then it's a given she's got personal issues, so I do believe some girls think theyre privileged with beauty.

Flatmanlewis · Answer

Yes. It’s a real thing but, as other said here quite eloquently, it is not all perks. I’ve seen some of the prettier girls at work absolutely be harassed by the more typical or even unattractive women. They are almost picked on to the point that they just move on.

I have been able to get to know a few really beautiful women in life and it’s amazing how often they are all absolutely drenched in insecurity and self doubt. When you have been told you’re pretty all your life you often just want somebody to see you for who you are on the inside.

jshm2 · Answer

No, it's not real. Everyone is ugly to someone.

Also, pretty "privilege" assumes there are people who get by on looks alone. Sure there are people who manipulate, but that's a mental skill - it's little to do with looks.

You only need to pick up any newspaper to see the sort of shit supermodels and other "pretty" people have to go through. They have little real peace or ease in their lives. Hence why most of them are addicts, or have mental health problems.

silvermoon84 · Answer

Yes and no. They might get more offers for jobs and relationships but they’re also less likely to be taken seriously. Look at the legally blonde movies. In the first one, even after Elle overcame the ditzy blonde stereotype and proved herself, her professor came on to her sexually, her fellow law student overheard and assumed she was having an affair with him all because she was pretty. In the second movie, her colleagues overlooked that she graduated from Harvard and still assumed she was stupid because of what she looked like. If she had been a plainer looking girl, she would have been taken a little more seriously.

My point is the more average Joes and Janes might get overlooked more, but when they are the chosen ones it’s for more substantial and less superficial reasons, so even though it seems like the pretty ones are winning, they’re really not.

Notfrommars · Answer

I know I’m in the minority opinion here but I personally don’t think it’s real because other women have vocally expressed hatred towards me or been afraid I would take their boyfriends from them because they think I am “prettier” than them (I am extremely shy and have never hit on a guy in my life and I always want more female friends but I have only ever been able to be friends with either women who are themselves pretty or who are lesbian). No man has ever really loved me-usually I get hit on a lot but it’s because they want sex. Im kind of happy that I’m getting older actually because people might start to take me seriously. When I was 18 and in college sometimes when I would try to participate in class people would say things like “shut up princess” (I come from a working background so definitely wasn’t a comment on any money I had which was none).

Biancam13 · Answer

Yes because I used to be unattractive as a preteen. I was dumpy and hadn't 'blossomed' yet. I was treated with apathy by most other kids and adults unless they knew me and loved me as a person.

Now, since my glow up, I make friends much easier on the whole and people make an effort to get to know me; people who don't know me still know who I am, (which never happened before might I add!) And men are much much nicer to me. Looking nice just gets you noticed; it's a social currency whether you like it or not. People also see your 'weirdness' and 'quirks' as 'cool and hip', whereas before they just saw you as weird when you weren't considered pretty.

Meropatrick · Answer

Its real but pretty disadvantages is real too. Some people get Bullied out of jealousy just because they r pretty. Even killed. Same sex people will LOATHE U. u will never have a same sex friend that easily and any friend u will get might end up leaving u bcs they will keep feeling inferior to u or fear their partner will be after u. The opposite sex will get obssesed over u and also they won't see u as a friend but as a possible booty call. Yes looks can bring u more money, confidence, nice treatment, its like taking a drug u get high on compliments and just looking g in the mirror. but on the other hand every coin had two sides. If u want to see the other dark side of being beautiful watch the materpeice of a movie called malena a story of a beautiful woman who got abused by the whole people in her town for being pretty woman who is alone with no Husband. Plus getting old is never easy especially for a hot person it might be traumatic too

Potteplante · Answer

It's real, I'm no beauty queen but I experience the difference in how I'm treated now vs at 110kg (220ish lbs) due to the simple fact that weight loss made me more pleasing to the eye.

It's real - it's bad, people's worth and how they get treated shouldn't be rooted within their sole.

Anonymous · Answer

It’s very much real- also known as desirability politics. As soon as people see the word “privilege” they become so defensive and will do everything to deny it but privilege is not the absence of hardship.
But I can acknowledge that it’s easier to see the effects of privilege when you’re not the beneficiary, so I can’t assign them all the blame.

soulOnDisplay · Answer

Of course you think it's real because Communism is being injected into your mind through social media and the greater culture. "Pretty privilege" suggests that conventional beauty is property that must be reclaimed, or seized by the less physically symmetrical proletariat. The idea of privilege is marxist. Stop allowing yourself to be controlled so easily.

Anonymous · Answer

There is no question pretty privilege exists and it is a powerful thing. Beautiful women are some of the most privileged people on the planet, but most of them take it for granted and/or deny they have it.

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah.
Doesn't mean you have it easy, but you do have an easier time making good impressions on acquaintances.
Honestly it sucks, but unless the whole world goes blind, you'll have an easier time just playing the game.
(on a sidenote you can definitely cheat the system by wearing fakeup shhh)

AngryCarl2 · Answer

I don't see pretty privilege as a bad thing. Beautiful people improve the world just by existing. It's only fair that they are rewarded for it in some small way. In fact I even think that if pretty privilege didn't exist I would have to invent it.

FreyaRed · Answer

It's real but it's not everything gold that shines.

inhua · Answer

it's bad enough where criminals can get away with their crimes

on the flip side, an innocent but ugly person is automatically guilty in the court of public opinion, no matter how much evidence there is to prove his innocence

BarryLiverstone · Answer

Omg it’s bad. In high school these girls were sooo stuck up! But were popular cuz guess..

msc545 · Answer

Of course it's real. A better. A person looks the more privilege they get. People who are not physically attractive are paid less money, get fewer if any dates, get poorer service in restaurants are less likely to be selected for a job and are generally discriminated against.

Guanfei · Answer

It is. And so what? Of course you're gonna be nicer and more attracted to pretty people, that's kinda normal.

As an ugly guy, I'm sad that I can't pretend to that privilege, but it is what it is.

What could we do against it? Disfigure them?

exitseven · Answer

It is very real. You never see hot girls working as bank tellers or telemarketers. They get hired for the jobs that everyone wants. Television work or executive secretaries.

Pacquet · Answer

It exists but I feel like worrying or thinking about it is a bit of a waste of time. It’s probably not going away in our lifetime or the next. Not until humans evolve into balls of light if we make it that far.

AaronKrieger · Answer

Sure, but I do not focus on it, since I do not see the point and it also comes with it's own disadvantages for women.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Sometimes people can get positions for which they are unqualified because they are "attractive." Other times people are prevented from getting advancements because the managers are jealous and feel threatened.

lightbulb27 · Answer

it is, it's offensive and disgusting too.  Unattractive rights!!!

boggboss · Answer

I think most know its real lol

genericname85 · Answer

no, that's a missuse of the word privilege. sure people tend to treat you better when you're pretty but that's not what privilege is.

Unit1 · Answer

Yes!

Anonymous · Answer

yes especially in america. Americans treated me like i was a celebrity or something whereas here noone gives a shit if you're handsome as buggery

Nifrayu · Answer

Of course it is. All forms of privilege that you hear about exist to a certain degree.

Grond21 · Answer

Pretty privilege and pretty discrimination are both real

Anonymous · Answer

NAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! Pretty people have no more advantage in life than the uggos. Why would you even THINK that?

Anonymous · Answer

It is. Im not even that attractive at all but if i were uglier i dont think guys would treat me half as nice as they do now.

Counterclocking · Answer

Looks do matter to be honest. However, looks can only go so far.

dolemite58 · Answer

of course it is, a pretty girl has so much power and can be so lazy at the same time it’s nauseating.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, if they don't like the way you look or the color of your skin they will treat like you like you don't matter.

Wise4myage · Answer

Yes, its very real and not fair.

Nikki1989 · Answer

It is very real.

Kelly6 · Answer

it is very real

bornnoutisdee · Answer

Yeah it’s real

Iron_Man · Answer

Some people get pretty privilege

RedInnocent68 · Answer

I give in to pretty girls all the time 😉

you_asked · Answer

I am pretty damn hot but do not get any privilege.

andy530 · Answer

Studies have shown it is

Christoff92 · Answer

Sure. Depending how it comes out

elizamichale1 · Answer

Yes it is

PrettyCrumblBb · Answer

Yeah and I have it

urpapi69 · Answer

It's real. Do you have this privilege?

Stacy2003 · Answer

To an extent their some unwanted advances also.

Anonymous · Answer

What's pretty privilege?

Teedragonborn · Answer

Im very attractive and my life is trash af... lol

SUMAIREBRAHIM · Answer

Yes 👍 100 percent

RyanK9b · Answer

Obviously duhh...

jahaims · Answer

Duh.

MissBoogus · Answer

Of course

Is pretty privilege real? What’s your input on it/how bad do you think it is?

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Is pretty privilege real? What’s your input on it/how bad do you think it is?

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